Unpaid Spousal Maintenance

[NowAndAgain44]

Does anyone have any experience with variations/enforcing spousal maintenance? I’m going to court for a second time in 2 years with my ex husband because he isn’t paying court ordered spousal maintenance. He stopped paying 2 years ago because of a downturn in his industry and was only paying CMS. He was supposed to pay me £3300 a month (inc CMS) which was varied downwards to £2000 plus £24k arrears. He paid for 1 year and then filed for bankruptcy. He still only earning half of what he used to when we were together. The previous judge said she thought he had deliberately downplayed his income to avoid paying me. He has paid me around £350k over the last 8 years and I kept the marital home and my rental property. I’m now working full time earning £52k which is a lot more than last time we went to court. I’m also moving to a larger property. He lives with his partner in her home and he is bankrupt, earning approx £60k. Any thoughts on what the judge will do this time?

No he didn’t take anything, he just moved out. It was his decision. The judge did send the order back because it was heavily weighted in my favour but my ex insisted on signing it. He agreed so should pay.

Do you not feel like you are exploiting his poor mental health at the time?

Is this the mother you want to be? The example you want to set for your children?

Have a really good think about it

He way paying over £4k a month for the first 4 years, so yes I did expect him to pay it. He was a very high earner.

That’s not how the judge saw it 2 years ago. She was that he deliberately stopped paying. I was really ill over the last 8 years, I’ve had several major surgeries.

Just no. You took him to the cleaners already, you dont let him take them on holiday, you dont want them to go to his fucking wedding. Wow. If my mum had did this to my dad and I found out id honestly hate her.

Maybe he did deliberately stop paying. But he should never have walked away with nothing. So why not call it quits now?

That’s wrong. It’s nothing to do with the trustee, it’s separate and dealt with by the family court who can still enforce once he is discharged.

It’s not often I say this on here, but you sound absolutely awful. I feel for your husband and children.

It doesn’t sound like he was any fit state to be signing anything. I feel sorry for him.

Legally SM continues even after bankruptcy. It is payable as is CM. If not paid the amount will build up and interest accumulates, but I believe (I could be wrong) it's only previous 12 months.
SM and CM are not treated as a debt. It should be paid.

The parties can seek a new court order to re- examine both parties current financial positions. You can also ask a judge to re-examine a bankruptcy claim but you need evidence. If your ex is indeed bankrupt and you are working I would think the judge would end the SM and just continue with CM depending on your children's age.

Sometimes it just takes one woman to give all women a bad name!

I cant believe what I am reading on this thread. OP this is so morally wrong

This has the tone of a reverse about it. There are too many posts mentioning how severely depressed "he" (ie the real OP?) was.

And the blunt phrasing of how OP has planned her life around what he had promised to pay, and so wants what was arranged. There's no attempt to sugar-coat what reads as money-grabbing phrasing.

The hearing was set aside until he is discharged which he will be very soon. So we are waiting for a date as the first date was moved at my request. Then I am hoping they will enforce something as I don’t feel it’s fair for him to not pay any of the arrears or anything for the next 3 years. I have been relying on this money for 8 years.

Discharged from where?

How else am I to phrase that we have a long standing order which I had planned my life around. What else was I supposed to do? The judge seemed to agree last time too. She didn’t let him get away without paying 2 years ago. He was depressed, but I was also unwell with a chronic illness and several surgeries.

You get discharged from bankruptcy after 12 months.

@NowAndAgain44 Was the marital home jointly owned? What happened witht that?

I don’t believe 75% of Mumsnet posts!

He’s bankrupt, how can he pay you anything?