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Divorce/separation

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Husband cheated via text denial and deflection

4 replies

Livingnightmare0 · 31/07/2026 22:49

I found texts by chance yesterday on my husbands phone, sounds like a young girl.

number not saved - back and forth about sex and missing each other. Asked if he would take her to a concert tonight which I googled and it’s showing tonight.

Chat about buying alcohol etc, I couldn’t see how long it goes back for.

He tried to say it was screen shots but it wasn’t as I was able to scroll, she also wrote his name on a message.

His reaction was firstly why am I looking at his phone, it’s private, it’s not him, it’s screenshots then he started reeling off all
my errors in the past. He thinks I was inappropriate with someone at work a few years ago, I was friendly with a male at work but nothing happened no flirting or anything and he was married with three kids and friendly with other females in the office also. I did not have any affair and be never crossed any boundary. At the time I did lie about messages because they were being taken wrong, he bought me (and others) a coffee but NOTHING happened and it was nothing romantic in any way, we just got on well. Regardless if I did something wrong there I don’t think that’s a valid excuse and I am totally disgusted.

i can’t stand for this and the men child behaviour we have 3 kids and both work I am so upset and let down and can’t believe he has been sat there writing these disgusting messages. Not spoken since he stormed off after grabbing his phone out my hands.

not sure if I just try and get on with it with our kids over the summer it is difficult to speak with them around but he is giving total man child.

OP posts:
Livingnightmare0 · 31/07/2026 22:50

To add I would be surprised if they have met in person and sounds more like a text thing as he is always at home and hasn’t worked late or anything.

OP posts:
Batties · 31/07/2026 22:51

Young girl as in a child?

Livingnightmare0 · 31/07/2026 22:53

Not a child as in like mid/ late 20s maybe where as we are mid 40s! Just sounded quite immature but who knows.

OP posts:
Changeaboutnow · 31/07/2026 22:57

Honestly OP this is where calling adult women girls is ridiculous because I was assuming your H was grooming a child.

Personally I don't see how your marriage can recover from this.

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