What happens legally if my 13 year old refuses contact? How. Do I respond to solicitors asking for more contact ?

[OhMy2017]

I have been divorced a long time and have a 13 year old who is now refusing to see dad

dad has a controlling personality and child has been struggling for a long time

now snapped and refusing all contact

he’s got solicitors involved asking for MORE contact

how do I respond please?
where do i stand legally if 13 year old refusing contact?

please help
thank you

You just say your child does not want contact at this point. Then it’s up to dad to take to court. Your child is old enough to make a decision however I’d look at what (if any) contact they might agree to so you can offer that. Maybe tea every few weeks, emails, calls etc.

What do you propose if your child refuses to go to school, or refuses to go to the dentist? Careful this doesn't turn into wider displays.

There are ways to make the 'handover' more automatic, like he collects from school. Above advice, on what can be offered, looks sensible too.

If it does get to court/legal, then a lot will hinge on how mature is your 13 year-old to be making such decisions.

The good news is that parental alienation as a concept is very much on its way out of fashion. The bad news is that you can still be seen as obstructive. So be neutral. Tell dad you feel this is something best explored between 13yr old and him in family therapy. Make reasonable suggestions which don’t involve forcing a child against their will. Ask school for their input. Be the calm, considered one and trust that dad will show up in his true colours nicely to any official…

Nobody can force your child to go, at 13.

Stay neutral in conversations with your ex, and don’t speak for your child - they have to be firm in their decision in discussions with CAFCASS, solicitors etc.