i am so angry right now i can’t even

[ralsta]

so my ex of a mere 8 months has a new girlfriend. i found out from a half naked selfie posted to instagram. he denied anything going on with this girl for months and even told me i was being stupid for even asking!

so a while back he told me he couldn’t have his children this weekend (it’s his turn) so i said oh right okay. he said he has to go to scotland with work…he’s never worked away but anyway i suspected something. so roll on today, i find out he’s actually gone away for the weekend to scotland with her…so he’s lied (no surprise he lies about everythjng possible) but not just lied, he’s chosen her over having his children. i wouldn’t be as bothered if he’d been honest but he’s lied and lied about everything

he won’t end up seeing his kids for nearly 3 weeks.cos it’s my weekend next weekend and im not changing them to work for him.

do i tell him i know he’s lying/to sort his priorities?

he’s a drinker, smokes weed, sex addict, porn addict. you name it he’s addicted.

in all honesty i feel like if he wasn’t in their life it would be less damaging than him being half arsed

am i overreacting?!

what would you do?

I am in a similar situation (except mine has been with her since he left me) I used to call him out when he prioritised the new woman but I realised all it was doing was winding me up. I now very deliberately detach from it, say 'ok' when he tells me he can't come for whatever reason (generally not the truth) and just think 'he's her problem now, not mine'. These men are not good men, they are not men we would want back, we can't change them or their priorities, so just let them. Luckily I have a willing family member to babysit if he screws up my plans, but even if I didn't I'd still just ignore it, not worth the emotional energy.

@YesThatsATurdOnTheRug thats the thing, it winds me up and then i get more wound up that he quite obviously doesn’t give a flying fook. just thinking about his penis and his dirty weekend away. it’s so annoying isn’t it, like at what point do you just say either start showing up or get lost!

He sounds utterly foul. I would not want my children anywhere near him.

Your issue is not the girlfriend. It’s the smoking, drinking, weed, porn.

His new girlfriend is welcome to him surely? He sounds absolutely disgusting .

And it sounds as though the less his children see of him the better.

he’s a drinker, smokes weed, sex addict, porn addict. you name it he’s addicted.

Blimey, good luck to her.

If you don’t want him to have a relationship with the kids it’s not a bad thing if he’s distracted by the new woman.

Presumably it’s supervised when he does see them given his multiple addictions and substance issues?