High conflict divorce with narcissist? Long post sorry!
First court hearing re divorce this week. His opening defense to court states: clearly she is bipolar and this is all a manic episode tied into BPD and I fear for my kids 🙄
Background - typical love bombing, fell hopelessly in love 7 years ago. I fell pregnant and he started changing. Things got weirder and weirder and i didn't listen to that feeling in my stomach. Last year Christmas fights with my teenagers (from previous marriage) escalated and for the first time ever I stood up to him and it went really bad. I realized what he was an started to withdraw. Lead to a 2 week sequence of events - hacking into emails, installing hidden cameras, stealing my passport and apostilled birth certificate, changing door locks so I couldn't lock bedroom (we slept in separate rooms) etc etc. I got a restraining order vs him. Felt so good!
We found hidden cameras still running while he was on the restraining order too.
Obviously he insists I am crazy and having an affair which I'm not!
Only negative thing against me is these recordings obtained during the restraining order captured me and my 13 year old "prepping" our 4 year old about the meeting the next day where she would be interviewed by child protection services which he now is using to state I was grooming her. Wasn't grooming, was just trying to prepare her to tell the truth about how he pushed her big sister around etc. That is the only negative thing against me. I know it wasn't right but I was in a panic and wanted our 4 year old to be truthful. And her 13 year old sister was the one prepping her sister the most as she was the one he abused the most. I know it was wrong but we were all still traumatized after the events leading to the restraining order.
And then he has ten character statements from friends and family in his home country (Poland) saying how amazing and what a wonderful dad he is despite they only see him once every two years and don't know me, and he's of course the best gentleman in front of other people.
I have police reports about the cameras, stolen passports and recordings of outbursts to my kids. Along with a timeline of how he changed, his eyes going black and the rage... plus strange sexual things etc etc.
As well as documentation about his sudden shift to far right extremes lost (anti lgbt, fear of rainbows and unicorns, cutting my daughters unicorn horns off, anti Islam, anti immigration, pro trump, pro Andrew tate, red pill movement et).
Any advice at all? 🥹😢🙏🏽 I know prepping our 4 year old was wrong but that's all he has against me.
He also raises the fact thst I took drugs and partied in my 20s against me in his statements.
FYI hearing is in Amsterdam as we live here now.