Practical advice re 50:50 childcare arrangements

[blueandwhitestripe]

I am currently going through the divorce process and once we sell the family home, will be having 50:50 childcare arrangements. We plan to do week on / week off with changeover day being Friday after school. The children are 16 and 13 and have asked for flexibility to see the other parent on their ‘off’ week, which I welcome. Does anyone have any practical advice on how to make it as easy as possible - particularly re moving belongings between houses etc? We plan to live close to each other - 1 or 2 miles apart. Thanks.

It partly depends on your relationship with your ex. Unfortunately my ex is a nasty, narcissist who is bitter, despite the fact she ended things!

We also live close by but went for something like 2233 format, with frequent swaps. This means we get regular contact, and occasionally will swap days over. Personally I thought a week on week off a bit too long to be away from them.

I would map out the year so you all know where you are, agree any days to swap outside the plan (I.e. mums birthday with mum, dads with dad etc) and any holidays.

Agree what happens for holidays and any dates need to be agreed in advance (i.e you dont book a holiday impacting other parent till you get the ok). Do everything on email and keep it for records and proof.

Stuff at houses is tough. It is easy (my case) for the other parent to not pull their weight re: clothes. I try to ensure that clothes I buy stay at mine and vice versa.

I would also agree what happens with joint spends i.e. uniforms, haircuts and also that if they are with you and need doctors/dentist that is your responsibility and vice versa