Can't move on

[amimadd]

So we grew apart, told him I didn't love him, I moved out with the kids and we have now sold today the FMH. I met someone else quite quickly after I moved out but took it slow, now xh wants to get back together and doesn't understand why we split up!!

My head is all over the place, I'm fed up, I don't know what to do - I thought I was doing the right thing by moving out and getting my own space - I enjoy living on my own with the kids, my xh seems to be missing the point, he wont listen and I cant seem to explain it any clearer - he's driving me mad. I do miss him and family life but I'm not really attracted to him anymore - he said he loves me and that's all we need?!

What do I do?!

Just say no. Limit contact and conversation. Move on.

Is it possible you need to be more assertive with him? Are you sugarsoaping the reasons why you left & he isn't sure why you left? If so then be clear & be honest & leave him with no doubt.

If he knows why you left but he's pressurising you to get back together then as Purple said, move on & only answer texts or messages about the children. Refuse to engage with any talk of getting back together.

He's the one who can't move on, not you!

How old are your children? As much as you miss family life, one day they will leave home and you don't want to be stuck with a man you're not really attracted to do you?

What about sex and romance? Are you really prepared to give that up?

I think you should discourage him from contacting you unless it's about the children.

Thanks all, yes I do need to stop contact - house has gone now so no financial ties just the kids. They are 9 & 16.

I tell him what the problems were but he doesn't listen - you would think moving out and selling the house would be enough of a message to say I wasn't happy! He admits he feels lost but that's not my problem, I don't feel any love for him and I cant be with someone I don't love :(