Recommendations for a really good legally qualified mediator in or near London please

[3mum]

Hi does anyone have any recommendations for a good lawyer mediator in London or surrounding counties please. Think they need to be lawyers as STBXH and I both are and they need to be both tough enough and experienced enough to keep control of a meeting which may involve the two of us going at it hammer and tongs and also be firm enough to make STBXH actually produce the paperwork re income etc which he needs to (he is a master at just letting stuff slide and claiming to be too busy when it suits him). I have spoken to a mediator recommended by my solicitor but was a bit underwhelmed. We are willing to travel a bit for the right person.

Thank you

A mediator isn't going to force him to produce paperwork. The point of going to a mediator is to see if you can reach agreement without going to court. Give it a try - but it doesn't sound promising from what you have said here!

Have you looked at the Resolution website?

I agree with Olgaga that the point of mediation is to try to reach a settlement without having one imposed by a court, but mediation works in a legal context and it is important (especially in Divorce cases) for the parties to have a proper legal and factual basis for any settlement reached. If 3mum's STBXH is willing to engage in the mediation process, he will have to come up with the required information. The alternative is failure of the mediation process and court orders followed by committal or, more likely, a judgement based on adverse assumptions as to his financial situation. Nothing 3mum said makes me think their case is not suitable for mediation. Hammer and tongs are often part of forging an agreement.

Thanks both of you. Yes I know the mediator can't compel him to produce paperwork but one who is clear that it needs to be produced by the next meeting is most likely to produce results ie no wriggle room. He knows that mediation is by far the cheapest route so I am sure he will co-operate.

Try www.cadoganmediation.com, they have legally qualified family mediators (dual qualified barristers). You can have co mediators; man and a woman, which might make STBXH more comfortable and allow for greater control of process. They are central London/home counties. Once you get cracking mediation has a good success rate, best of luck.

You definitely need to equip yourself with legal advice before you see a mediator.

To be honest, mediation is something you are urged to do these days and it's worth a shot as long as your relationship isn't abusive.

You can read more about mediation, and why you have been encouraged to go, here.

I think it only works if both parties are willing to make it work and avoid court - and if you can't reach agreement between you anyway, I think that's unlikely! But it's definitely worth a try - it can save you a lot of money if it works.

Thanks Hickers I will check them out.

I'd suggest you look at experienced barrister mediators rather than solicitor mediators for the approach you're after. Some solicitor mediators can be a bit too weak (and I speak as a solicitor). I don't practise in family law so can't help with specific recommendations but an experienced (7-10yrs call +) barrister or QC if you have the money sounds the best option for you.

Try Family Law in Partnership, based in covent garden. Recommended from 2 sources for my woes. Your situation sounds familiar (re dragging if the feet)! Good luck

Thanks very much Cassell and Mango. Will check them out.