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Shall I patent this idea for social distancing?

28 replies

Coronapip · 23/03/2020 17:41

How many people even know how far 2m away is?

Shall I patent this idea for social distancing?
OP posts:
SeasonallySnowyPeasant · 23/03/2020 17:43

I was thinking a zorb would do the trick. Stops people buying crap too.

EL8888 · 23/03/2020 17:44

How about the cone of shame that cat / dogs wear but sealed and 2m in radius?!

Coronapip · 23/03/2020 17:46

With eye holes ...?

OP posts:
Coronapip · 23/03/2020 17:47

I should have added a button to press to collapse rotors when approaching doorways

OP posts:
homemadecommunistrussia · 23/03/2020 17:47

You might come a cropper getting through the front doorShockGrinStar

Medianoche · 23/03/2020 17:47

The best, but not cheeriest, reminder is ‘leave enough space for a dead relative lying on the floor’.
Admittedly, only works if your relatives are quite tall.

BonnesVacances · 23/03/2020 17:49

DH has a metre rule which I told him he should wave about when he has to go to the supermarket. It's shorter than the required distance but I reckon people would stay further away from him than the end of the rule. Grin

user1353245678533567 · 23/03/2020 17:50

That looks like a lethal weapon.

Lllot5 · 23/03/2020 17:51

It’s one Richard Osman I think.

T0tallyFuckedUpFamily · 23/03/2020 17:51

This one, Medianoche?

GreenTulips · 23/03/2020 17:52

It’s like a 20th century chastity belt.

Plus it keeps the kids away as well! Bonus.

Works in all levels.

T0tallyFuckedUpFamily · 23/03/2020 17:53

Just use a hula hoop everywhere you go and it has the added benefit of keeping you agile and slim. Grin

Fedupandpoor · 23/03/2020 17:59

On the news this morning they said its the length of Peter Crouch. I'm imagining hundreds of people walking around swinging life Peter Crouch dolls around themselves in Lidl.

Coronapip · 23/03/2020 18:00

Or here's another potential application: those who refuse to comply with social distancing HAVE to wear one, by law - like a tag...

OP posts:
HonestlyItsFine · 23/03/2020 18:26

I saw official guidance that said 2 metres (around 3 steps) away.
I'm sure 3 steps, unless they are Basil-Fawlty-Esque, are not 2m.

lamppostdog · 23/03/2020 18:27

Reminds me of the collars they made slaves wear

Thisismytimetoshine · 23/03/2020 18:31

Tell the idiots still crowding onto the London tubes...

Fairenuff · 23/03/2020 18:31

I think someone beat you to it OP.

Shall I patent this idea for social distancing?
Deelish75 · 23/03/2020 18:33

I’m thinking of getting a Scarlett O’Hara 👗 I can do a LOT of swishing in that!

FadedRed · 23/03/2020 18:35

All need one of these, just hose it down with detergent and warm water when you get home.

Shall I patent this idea for social distancing?
MissPoldark · 23/03/2020 19:30

@fadedred like it, but how do you pick stuff up at the supermarket 🧐

EthelMayFergus · 23/03/2020 19:49

Fuck me, that's brilliant. I'll take six. How much?

FadedRed · 23/03/2020 22:05

£19.99 on t’interweb- marketed for weddings/proms/race meetings where people(women) are wearing big posh frocks.

FadedRed · 23/03/2020 22:08

@MissPoldark - long reach grabber - available all over the place, but especially in shops that sell disability aids.

RandomMess · 23/03/2020 22:15

I was just thinking of taking a hockey stick and waving that around...