Reassurance wanted about trying to conceive at 34 to 35

[BunnyLover92]

Hi all, I'm just looking for some reassurance really. I'm 34 in August and myself and my husband had planned to be TTC by now. Unfortunately a few months ago he has a major vertigo attack and still isn't better, he's been seen by specialists and they don't have answers just it should get better in time. He works in the rail industry and is stressed about having to reapply for his role whilst he is sick as he feels he wouldn't perform well in an interview. He's also become very depressed as a result of being poorly for so long.

We've agreed he needs to be in a better mental state before we start TTC, I'm just looking for reassurance from people who have conceived at 34-35. We plan to be one and done. He's open to doing fertility tests at a clinic so I'm also keen to know if you think that's worth doing.

I'm concerned I'm going to be too old but I can see his point of view and how he's feeling.

I think where we are it's also that we are a uni city and our area has a lot of academics. Not known for being younger parents on the whole.

I didn’t start trying until I was over 40. I now have a wonderful DS. Good luck!

I conceived at 39. I'm on W23 of pregnancy. I was convinced we would conceive immediately. It took us 8 months of trying and 100% real talk the only reason our little girl is inside me now is because I quit my job. We conceived first try after my period when I wasn't stressed and he was relieved he didn't have to worry about me.

I know of loads of people who conceived at 34/35 and older. I was 35 with my youngest, it took me about 6 months. I did have a threatened miscarriage, but all was well.

I conceived as easily at 25 as I did at 35- one go (though first was unplanned). Obviously just anecdotal & one person. But I do know a lot of people who’ve had kids 35 and older, well into their 40s.

It took me 13 months with my first at 32 and 19 months with my second at 36 (with an early miscarriage second time round too). I don't mean to sound harsh, but if your husband has clinical depression it could be years before he feels ready enough to become a Father...it's not a broken leg you're dealing with here. So I'd be wary about waiting too long as you just don't know if you both do really want a child. Good luck!