Anyone trying for their first baby over 40?

[ConfusedCrab]

Hi All, I wondered if anyone else was in the same boat of trying for their first over 40? I’m 42, fell pregnant in July but ended in miscarriage at 7 weeks. Just had my period, so trying again. It does feel like the next couple of cycles are really it in terms of trying.

I'm 42 and have been trying for 4 years. I'm currently going through my 3rd miscarriage. I'm giving it until I'm 43 (about 6 months) then I'm done. And will enjoy many holidays in the future with my husband instead.

So sorry to read that @PaperSheet its a horrible thing to go through. Are EPU looking after you? I’m a similar time frame to you for one last shot 🤞

I'm 41 giving it a go for baby #2. In April/may I had a blighted ovum. Iv been taking lots of pre conception vitamins and Co 10 since the mmc so iv only plucked up the courage to ttc this month I'm starting the tww super nervous!

Fingers crossed for you @Itonlytakesone how old is your other child?

@ConfusedCrab
I only dtd once in my fertile window on cd11 so I'm not sure if that's enough. She's 5

There's no reason to think you've only got a couple of cycles left of trying. Have you both had a fertility MOT to rule out any issues? You probably have to go to a private clinic but it's worth spending the money.

I had my first and last child at 44 after 4 years of trying. We tried to speed it up by doing IVF but that didn't work and we conceived naturally at 44.

Thanks @Jk987 it’s more my own cut off. I have had a MOT and all ok from my perspective (though I had a miscarriage in August). Husband has checks on Fri with a view to possible ivf, but I’m not sure I want that.

Can I ask how you’re finding being an older mum?

Hi @ConfusedCrab, I don't feel like an older mum, just a mum and a lucky one at that. It's all I know! Where I live in London it's common to have them in your late thirties and 40's. Age is one component in a package of variables.

There are people on here who say they'd never have one past 35 as they'd be too knackered! That's because they've already got a busy life with kids!

I'd say there's no point in stopping ttc at 42 unless it's causing you too much headache. Certainly wouldn't go back on contraception, rather see what happens with an open mind. It's a very personal thing though. Good luck x

‘Age is one component in a package of variables’, I really like that! Thanks for your post @Jk987 thats really positive, I’m definitely not going for contraception again so we’ll see I guess.

Hi OP. Not my first but I conceived at 41 and had my daughter at 42. I am a bit more tired than I was with DD1 but it's certainly doable.

@Imalittlewitch the extra tiredness is probably because you've already got a little one rather than your age.

@ConfusedCrab sounds like we're in very much the same boat. I conceived first baby in July aged 41 and then had a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks in August. Period just started a couple of days ago and thinking about trying again. I think my worry is how many miscarriages I'm prepared to go through rather than necessarily putting a limit on age. Hopefully it won't come to that, but I think if we got to three miscarriages I probably wouldn't be able to take any more; though I realise I may feel very differently if and when it comes to it.

Hi @Fletchasketch sorry you’ve experienced similar.

Trying again this month as my period returned, my head is completely scrambled at the moment though. I keep thinking about what we’d be doing if previous pregnancy had been successful etc.

@ConfusedCrab @PaperSheet
I'm in same boat as you both I'm 41 I'll probably give it another go next month but I'm already thinking after that, is it something I want to continually go through? this tww is so hard imagining every symptom. It messes with your head🙈.

I'm 7dpo did a test this morning- negative I appreciate too early though but I did it anyway it was a cheap Amazon one. I don't feel pregnant though I think my tense stomach is just nerves -they are shot!

I’m 40 in January with 2 children aged 11&13. I have a new partner with no children so have been trying.
we had a chemical in June, got pregnant straight away after which ended in MMC at 9 weeks. I am overweight with BMI 32 which I am currently working on.
I had surgical option 3 weeks 5 days ago and ovulated 2 days ago. We DTD twice day before ovulation and day before that. I am obviously hoping to catch straight away and be be of those success stories that seem to be everywhere, and I don’t know emotionally how I will cope seeing a negative test.
i am also the same in the sense of it’s not an age cut off it’s miscarriage cut off, how many emotionally can I put myself through it. After having perfect scans at 6 and 7 weeks and baby growing until 9 just baffles me.
sending lots of positive baby vibes to you all x

@Joleyjojo
That must have been so hard to get the all clear 6/7 weeks only for that to happen at 9 I'm so sorry that happened to you. Don't blame you getting straight on to it people do say you're more fertile after a mc, don't waste the opportunity.

I had a mmc in summer saw nothing in the sac at 6 weeks 4days it was so upsetting that my body didn't recognise or miscarry by itself it ended d&c 9 wks. I'm currently 7dpo

Just checking in, how’s everyone getting on? Resisting testing at the moment, although I’m pretty sure I’m not.

Hi I am 10dpo and I had a stark white negative. I can also feel my AF is on its way. I am feeling sad but ok about it. This will be my first period after surgical management so I need to be grateful my body has got itself back into a routine. I haven’t excessively tried this month, done a lot of unhealthy eating and drinking too. I need to be grateful that my body is working. However I am throwing my all at it this time.
how many DPO are you?? 🤞🏼 for everyone x

@Joleyjojo
Hi, I started af yesterday after not being successful last cycle started testing 7dpo all stark white... Never mind on to this month. I'm trying to make healthier choices too. Just had an avocado read they're good for the uterus. I'm on pre conception vitamins too

The stark whites are soul destroying not even a hint of an evap to obsess over lol. But then I would moan about the evaps 😂
I have been taking my folic acid and Vit D but might invest in some pre conception vitamins. Which ones do you take?
I was going to start CQ10, not sure if BF should take them too or if it’s just a female thing x

@Joleyjojo
Soul destroying!! I stopped taking Co q10 only because it's expensive 🙈. Think it's just a female thing too yes. I'm going to try to eat healthier instead. I take the pre conception pregnacare his/her. It didn't work for me last month🤣 though. I also dont track ovulation I just dtd in my fertile window and hope nature takes care of the rest....Tests dpo are enough to stress over🙊

I’m 11dpo (I think), period due on Sat but I don’t feel pregnant. Going to try not to test until after Sat. First cycle post miscarriage and also not ate that well / been that healthy….

Just noticed the zita west tablets I’ve been taking are for the first trimester, hoping that’s still ok for pre conception 😬 I’ve also been taking vit D

Period arrived today. I knew I wasn’t pregnant as I just didn’t feel it. But still 😞

Mine came last week and Iike you I knew I wasn’t pregnant. All the stark white tests told me that, but it’s still so upsetting.
sending you lots of love. Onto a new cycle, I’m really trying to positive this month but then it’s a harder fall. Just can’t win xccx

Same to you @Joleyjojo , I’m allowing myself today to wallow and then onwards and upwards. Feel like my life has been on hold this year, it’s so difficult.