No luck conceiving 3rd baby

[Mamasuzette]

Hi,

I want to start by saying i feel so lucky and blessed to have two beautiful children. Last year we decided to start trying for a 3rd. It has been 10 months now and nothing has happened. I haven’t done any ovulation tests yet, i have just been having regular sex and have been keeping an eye on my periods on the Flo App. I am 34 years old (DH is 35).

One thing that is concerning me is that my cycles (which have always been on the longer side- 32-38 days) have become longer and longer in recent months. This month i am late, have had negative pregnancy tests and am on day 50. The longest cycle i have had so dar was 57 days. The weird thing is, i am getting all of the bloating/period cramps/PMS but no period. Is this something i need to investigate? What could be causing this? And is it the reason i am not falling pregnant?

My first and second pregnancies were when i was 24 and 28. At 34 could this be the start of perimenopause? I also had c sections with my two previous babies, could that be a reason?

We wouldn’t pursue IVF if it doesn’t happen as we can’t afford it privately, and we are content with our children. However, i can’t lie and say I’m not disappointed that it hasn’t happened for us. I was just wondering if anyone else had experienced anything similar?
Even if we could afford IVF, i don’t think we would pursue it as it’s such an emotional rollercoaster (friends of mine have been through it). We sort of have the mentality that ‘whatever will be will be’. I’m also wondering whether there could be a medical problem causing my lack of periods that i need to have investigated.

@Mamasuzette I just read this whole thread and am absolutely delighted to read your good news. Congratulations 🎊 I wonder was your fertile days just been missed by the flo app predictions. Either way its fantastic news 😊

Hello @Mamasuzette , congratulations!!

I’m just wondering if you’d share what you did differently this cycle? I know you used the ovulation sticks. I’ve been using them a while as well as tracking my temperature but no luck. Just going into cycle 7 following a MMC, my daughter was conceived cycle 2 back in 2021! How did you time DTD?

Feel like we’re trying everything and getting nowhere!

Thank you 😊
I think that was definitely what happened, especially at the beginning. I also think the ovulation sticks really helped (mentally), as i knew i was definitely ovulating. Before I started using them I didn’t actually know whether i was or not x

Thank you 😊
yes of course…

The ovulation sticks were the main thing. I didn’t track my temperature i just literally used the clear blue sticks with the smiley faces. Interestingly though, we DTD the day before the test showed i was ovulating (coincidentally), then again on the actual day. I think looking back in previous cycles it was happening too late and i was missing my window.

I have also been going to the gym three times a week for the last 5/6 weeks. I wasn’t over weight before, but my fitness levels weren’t as good as they could have been. I had also been referred to an endocrinologist by my GP because of my hormone levels. I don’t know whether subconsciously i felt more relaxed/optimistic about things because of that.

I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you, and hope you get your positive test soon xx

I also thought people might find this useful…

I had an early scan due to some pelvic pain. Baby is fine and growing well. But straight away the doctor noticed how polycystic my ovaries were. I had an ultrasound less than a year ago and there was absolutely no sign of this. It is likely the reason it took me longer to get pregnant this time. My blood tests had shown that my hormone levels were slightly off, but didn’t really indicate the full extent of it. I just thought i would update incase anyone is in a similar situation. If so it may be worth requesting a pelvic ultrasound if you are in a similar situation and are trying to get pregnant, even if you have had one not so long ago. I think someone else also mentioned that they developed polycystic ovaries not long after an ultrasound. I hope this helps x

I've just read your thread @Mamasuzette ! Congratulations ❤️ and thank you for sharing your experience! At 35 and trying for my third, its given me hope, I've had a really rough day after some nasty false positives and I feel much more positive after reading your news ❤️

I’m so glad it’s made you feel more positive ❤️ I hadn’t come across many positive stories during my journey, and they would have helped me too. Not to say that there aren’t many, but a lot of women probably stop posting when they do fall pregnant. I just thought if anything in my story helps or resonates with anyone else it might help in some way :) wishing you all the best xxx

I am going through my 2nd miscarriage.

I have two healthy DDs 7 and 5

Both miscarriages I got pregnant in the first month trying (unlike my two DDs) but I cannot pass the 7 week mark.

Each time it happens I try to convince myself I need to leave it at 2 DC and that is it.

However I know I desperately want a third and do not feel "done"

I really do worry about the age gap getting bigger and bigger with each lost pregnancy

Does anyone else feel the same re age gap?

Lovely news @Mamasuzette congratulations, I found it really positive to read your recent experience, and that's great baby is growing well. Thank you for the tips, I have a gynecologist appointment coming up so will ask about a scan. Hope you are feeling well.

@ohyesherewego I am very sorry for your loss, it's an awful thing to go through.

I am 36, have also had 2 mmc, one at 9 weeks, one at 12 but both only made it to 8.5 weeks.... it seems to be a strange pattern. Been ttc 14 months now since the last one.
I have 2 dc 7 and almost 5 so pretty similar gaps, my gap is alot bigger now than when we first started ttc but I just keep telling myself my dc are getting easier as time goes on which will make things easier if I ever end up with a third.

Have you had nhs clotting bloods ? Coagulation screen ?
Ask for that if not.

So sorry to hear re your losses

We know that pain

You can ask your gp to refer you a tommys baby charity miscarriage clinic

Have you had your thyroid and vit d and prolactin all checked ?

Dya take daily vit d ?

Getting your vit d to optimal ie 100.. helps some people sometimes.
Theres a link with vit d being high reducing miscarriage risk

I’m really sorry for your losses ❤️

I too have worried about the age gaps. I think there are pros and cons to bigger/smaller age gaps. My eldest two have a smaller age gap which is lovely as they are close, however, i remember when my youngest was a newborn… let’s just say i don’t know how i functioned on such little sleep 🤪 i think it’s easier for parents when the older children are that bit more independent. Also, i am really looking forward to seeing mine actually be able to understand what’s happening/ and be able to feel like they are ‘helping’ with baby. One of my best friends is one of 3 sisters. There is a 7 year gap between her and the middle sister, then 10 years between the middle and youngest. They are all really close. There is 10 years between my husband and his youngest brother. They are also really close.

I really hope you’re doing well at such a difficult time. Wishing you well xxx