Overweight 36yo TTC for first time - would love company to fight wait and weight!!

[ClairLesley]

Hello. This is my first time on Mumsnet. I'm 36 years old, overweight, and desperate to conceive. Seems I can't turn around without seeing women with bumps/buggies/babies .... makes me convulse with jealousy!!! My 28 day cycle runs like clockwork and I've just started using an ovulation predictor. I've had 6 BFN months in a row now and am starting to feel it won't happen. For a week each month I get so hopeful wondering if my premenstrual cramps & niggles are really early signs of pregnancy ... but no, just dear old Aunt Flo. If there's anyone out there going through the same thing and hoping for a BIG FAT POSITIVE in February, I'd love your company!

Hello Purple G! Glad you're back ... I hope your DP is recuperating well. Sounds like he's a real trooper However, I have to confess you've lost me with the pots thing ... I did tell you I'm relatively new at this

I'm just back from Tescos - I swear every pregnant woman in a 100 mile radius must have been there today . Won't it be wonderful when it's our turn?!? We'll be able to fill our trolleys with Pregnancy magazines, cleaning supplies (for nesting stage) and Maltesers ...

Day 2 of temping (CD5) ... I'm really getting into it, as is geeky DH and am looking forward to having a whole chart to torture myself with . Let's hope you get a BFP this month Purple G and don't need to buy a therm ... and I shall be expecting updates on symptoms (real and/or imaginary)!!

Womba - so sorry about last night!! My e-jackpot vibes must have only just missed you Like you said there are plenty of weekends to go in 2008 (and Wednesdays, and Friday night Eurodraws) ... I'll keep sending them your way just in case!! You are so fortunate to be spending time at home with your DCs ... sounds like they have a fab Mum!!

OK. My Legs Up the Wall Commitment for this month is to drink 2L of water per day (I believe this is meant to help EWCM & those precious little swimmers) ... oh, and to actually put my legs up the wall following the deed.

Anyone else like to make a BabyMaking Commitment for February?

Legs Up the Wall Forever

Hey Legs-Up-the-Wallers!! I've been browsing around different threads and found a post from a lady called Lily72 on the 15th Jan this year (my birthday!). This is what she had to say:

"After 10 years of no contraception and small possibilty of having children...My partner and I had sex one evening and joked about an old wives tale of putting womens legs up the wall to give the sperm a chance to travel their long distance. I put my legs up the wall and nine months later had a little girl!!!I have no idea whether this is related or not...I am just happy to have had my baby...(who is now 18 months!) Keep trying and relax. I wish you all the best in your efforts! "

It's a SIGN

Hello. To answer you question several posts ago - yes, I've had cramps now twice in the four months I've been trying and sore boobs and felt sick and both times been convinced I was pregnant only to get BFNs. Diet starts tomorrow though. Have BD'd so far on day 10 and day 11. Am now waiting for day 14. Any sure fire ways to get DP in the mood that night without feeling under pressure?

Hello again EllieL! Symptoms suck when they're not the pg symptoms we're hoping for

It's really interesting you mentioned BD days ... that's where I think DH & I have been going wrong. Think our BDing has been too late most mths. I've a clockwork 28 day cycle & always assumed I ov'd on day 14 even though EWCM arrived several days beforehand ... so now I'm not so sure I'm ov'ing when I thought I had (which is why I'm temping to try & find out). So this time around, I'm hoping we can BD every day or at least every other day from first sign of EWCM to a day or two past CD14. As for ways to get in the mood ... one thing I've found is that DH seems to prefer BD in the morning (bleughh!!) so I try to surprise him some ams. Haven't heard him say no to a.m. nookie yet

PurpleG, Womba ... any other ideas?

Morning CL... I read somewhere to count back 20 days before AF was due and BD like mad from then on... Tried that this month - and have been having a weird itchy belly and funny niggles over ovary area - bizarre! I tell you, you spend all your young adult life trying NOT to get pregnant, then when you want one - it's like rocket science - for chuff's sake!
The pot thing - ooh am so embarassed to admit this - - am just so knackered from all the bed bouncing that I thought a bit of DIY (for him) was in order! I just collected the 'sample' and went about putting it in the right place!!! Oooh - am sorry - far too much detail! Lol...
Other than that - I've not got a clue - obviously I'm getting a lot of 'lose weight' advice from well-meaning people but bigger women than me get pregnant all the time. Then you start to doubt yourself, then worse still you doubt his little 'swimmers' - ie if he's a lazy slug - will his sperm be the same??? See - I've gone from calm, collected professional woman to neurotic freak in under 3 months - aaargh! (stay sane, stay sane)...
I'm even trying to ration myself on this site to twice a day - it's driving me nuts this whole thing - and obviously that's not going to help...

Ha!! You are a genius, PG ... I wonder if turkey basters are still half price after Christmas? May have to invest ... that sounds so much more civilized

So - and sorry to be nosy - have you been BD'ing every day then as opposed to every other day? It's difficult to know what to do as you read pros & cons for each. Please don't tell me 3 & 4 times a day or I'll feel completely inadequate/crushed! I wonder what's up with the itchy belly/funny niggles dealio? Very exciting!! Which CD are you on again?

Counting 20 days back, BD would commence on Friday for me ... am going to give it a try!

Know what you mean about this site - although it's wonderful to have somewhere where you are free to let your neurotic freakiness out ... helps me hide it from everyone else in the real world

Hope you have a good day!

Hi CL - see I just can't stay away can I?
God no, we're not BD'ing every day - to be honest I'm getting bored of the whole thing... (every other day or 3 days is average at the minute)... I want a baby, and for us to be a family - but I also want to stop looking at my DP as a walking sperm bank...
He's not got that much oomph to be honest and that is probably going to hinder our attempts. He's a loving, caring cuddly man - I couldn't ask for better - but the sex life before TTC was easy going, it didn't matter if he performed or not (so to speak) TMI again! - you know what I mean?
Now, poor bugger - he feels the pressure to perform, he get's knackered & half the time I'm like - is it worth the effort - such a cow thing to say - but in my naive way - I thought it'd be a damn sight easier than this!
I'm on CD 12 - I've checked the dates for ovulation/fertile days on babycentre and this week is it - so here we go again! Will probabbly buy a temp pack and have a go from next month - if nothing else it will give me something to do, something else to focus on - and see how that goes.
If you like - contact me via MN & we can email - I have a suspicion he'll be checking my posts as he caught me reading with avid interest last night!
As for turkey baster - nope a syringe did it for me - but one lesson learnt - I used a sterile 5 ml syringe - and it wasn't big enough - made a mess, and probably didn't even hit the jackpot - so to speak! Lol...
Will have to get a bigger syringe and try again... ha ha ...
Oh the joys!

Hi Purple G ... I've been busted too! My own fault - I've never been one for chat rooms ... so when my geeky DH saw reams of writing & smileys he started to read over my shoulder. He's all for TTC ... but I think he'd be terrified if he realised just how obsessed I am right now

So I'll probably take you up on email Feel free to get in contact back!

I thought it would be easier too - all I can remember is my Sister in Law telling me how shocked she was that it was 'that easy' when she & my brother conceived their first child. Grrrrr ...

You are too funny re BD'ing & syringe. Although, I have to confess you are a better woman than I am. If truth be told, if it weren't for the whole TTC aspect of BD'ing ... I wouldn't really give a hoot if I never BD'd again. Try to hide total lack of libido from DH. Seriously, I'd much rather read or watch a good movie or look for something wonderful to win on eBay or fall asleep the moment my head touches the pillow

CD12 ... wonderful!! Best of luck to you Remember to pioneer Legs Up the Wall for us!!

Hi CL, bless your heart - my DP is exactly the same - would prefer to snuggle and cuddle - the whole 'I have to shag you NOW' thing is really getting to him - hence the DIY - figured he may as well have some fun!!! lol... OMG!!!
Feel free to contact me at [email protected] - and we can obsess at leisure - besides checking emails at work is far easier than MN obsessing...
Hope to hear from you soon... Night...

Hi Purple and Clair..how are you both?

You two are both making me smile with your posts, and i mean that in a nice way. You both seem like such lovely ladies and your overwhelming desires to be pregnant are heartwarming. But i do feel for your dh's...how must they be coping with all this BD'ing??

I remember my dh being a little put out when i fell pregnant so quickly...he was looking forward to all the practicing. And then, he kind of freaked out on me and became all protective and wanted to keep me wrapped in cotton wool. Nookie was definitely off the agenda too...he was too worried about hurting the bean or poking him!! I did point out that he wasn't that well endowed, but it didn't help matter!
So, you'll both be pleased to know that there is a possibiliy that your dh's will feel the same, and when you're expecting, you'll just get all the cuddles and then be left to watch the tele or bury yourself in a good book!

Clair..there are loads of conflicting ideas about how often you should BD. Some say that you should abstain throughout the month and only BD when you know you're ovulating, as the sperm will be stronger and more eager to hunt your egg out! Others say, if you can manage it, to do it every day etc...
The one piece of advice that seems to be the same throughout though, is that if you orgasm as the guy ejaculates, this seriously increases the chance of fertilization.
Obviously, a little DIY might be required but hey, whatever it takes huh??

I'm currently having a little panic of my own here. AF seems to be a little late in visiting me this month...by about 5 days so far. Since having my DD, my periods have been a bit all over the place so, i'm not reading too much into it yet. However, if i get excruciatingly sore boobs within the next few days... and

Anyway, i hope everything is going great for you and would you mind if i stayed in touch via email too? I don't get much time to come on mumsnet, although i always find time to read my emails! I'm not really that clued up on cycles, temping and turkey basters, but if i can be of any help in any other way, i'd be only too delighted.

My email address is
treacy claire @ gmail . com (without the spaces)

Hope to catch up with you soon...goodnight x

WOMBA - what do you mean AF is late in visiting? Has she been late by 5 days before? This has the potential to be very exciting!!!! At what stage would you test if she doesn't arrive soon? I can normally time mine to the hour, so I know I'd be freaking out if I was just a day overdue ... will definitely email. I'm clair . brigman @ gmail . com (without the spaces also).

Your DH sounds wonderful ... wrapped in cotton wool & no nookie. I can only hope!!!

No other symptoms apart from AF not here yet? Did you have symptoms early on in your other pregnancies?

Yikes!! Keep in touch!!!!!!!

CL.

Hi all not wishing to hijack but im in this position too and would like to hear any info...also your welcome to check out a thread im on caller read aim hangfire, all of us on there are waiting for different reasons