Infertility, miscarriage and now a BFP(and anxiety!!)

[chasingmyrainbow]

Hi all,

I just wanted to ask if any of you have been in a similar situation to me.
I have been TTC for over two years now and fell pregnant last Jan which I miscarried soon after.
We have since struggled to get pregnant. On Wednesday, I had my first consultation with the infertility expert at my local hospital who put us on the waiting list for ICSI due to male fertility issues (low mobility and poor morphology). We were told the waiting list was really long and we've felt really sad all week.

This morning on our 3 hour walk, I decided to swing into Boots and buy some cheap strip tests as my period is late. My period is so erratic that this isn't unusual and I tend not to test due to the heartbreak.
Anyway, a few tests later, I got a BFP. But here's the thing, I'm absolutely terrified 😔😫 ive had tummy cramps today and am paranoid it's going to all end in MC again. I work in a school and am super anxious about going in tomorrow as I'm just so scared of not being relaxed and doing anything that might jeopardise this pregnancy.
Really terrified 😭 anyone had a similar situation? Any help or advice is so appreciated.

Congratulations!!

I’ve had the exact same experience minus the bfp so can imagine how you are feeling. Trying 2 years, bfp March 2020 which I lost quickly after and still no BFP.

I would suggest taking some time off work so you can at least remove some of the anxiety. This BFP is precious and if that will make you feel more comfortable and in control then I’d do whatever you need to do.

I hope it all goes well for you xx

Omg this is fantastic news after all this time!! I bet you can’t believe it.

I was in a similar boat, TTC since July 2019, had an ectopic in October 2020 and got my bfp early this month and was a WRECK. I had cramps and felt like my period was coming for weeks, I still have some cramping now and actually read it can be your uterus stretching and now when I feel it I like to think it’s stretching because things are progressing.

I know it’s easier said than done but no panicking can change the outcome. You can spend all your time like I did in a complete panic for what will be to be, or relax and wait for what comes. I would recommend getting an early scan to reassure you as that was the only thing that put me at ease and re-asses my mental state (I know anything can happen still)

Do you have many students as schools are supposed to be closed? Can you get time off work?

Wonderful news! I would try to take a week off work to just take things very easy while your embryo beds in. Eat nourishing food and relaxxxxxx. Then you can return to work knowing you've done your best to help this one get started. Obviously a lot of this is totally out of your control but I do think a week of nurturing and nourishing yourself would be seriously beneficial on many levels.

Thank you all for your lovely messages. I've got a different teacher to cover me tomorrow and I will contact my GP for blood work to see if hormones seem normal (they didn't in my MC this time last year). I will then book a private early scan just to see if everything is ok.
My head is super supportive and has been through the whole journey. I plan on calling him after I've spoken to the GP and ask to have time to work from home until after Feb half term (that gives me three weeks). We are doing a mix of online teaching and lessons as well as in school lessons so I can still technically do my job but from the comfort of my own house (much easier on my body!).
Thank you all for your lovely messages. Every cramp makes me panic and I'm just praying for the best 🙌🏻🙌🏻💓

Hi @chasingmyrainbow ! First of all congratulations and I'm sorry for your previous loss. I am in exactly the same boat. I had a MC almost 2 years ago and I haven't been able to get pregnant since. I was diagnosed with PCOS in the summer and had no period since July. Anyway I was feeling a bit iffy in the week so I took a test and it was positive! 1-2 on a clear blue so super early but I am SO stressed. Checking the toilet every few minutes. I know it's not good for me so trying to keep busy. It's so terrifying and nerve wrecking but all we can do is stay strong and hope for the best xx

@eastview congratulations!! Sounds like we are in very similar situations. It's so stressful and I'm trying to stay as calm as possible but knowing what happened last time makes the anxiety so much higher this time! I've got some clear blue digitalis coming tomorrow and last time they said 1-2 weeks even though it was 6 weeks so that's what spurred me to get blood work, which was worrying, and I miscarried 2 days after the blood results. If the digital comes back 3+ weeks tomorrow il be relieved. Congratulations and keep me posted on how it's going with you 🤞🏼💓

@eastview also sorry to hear about your MC and PCOS, it's such a difficult journey. 💓💓

@chasingmyrainbow don't be too worried as I think clear blues go from conception! When was your period due? Mine was due yesterday and I got a positive clear blue 1-2 on Wednesday! Too scared to take another one (I did take 3 on Wednesday)!! Let us know how it goes 😊 x

My period is super erratic since my MC so it varies between 30-35 days generally. It's currently
Day 37 so only a couple of days late. I got 3 BFPs earlier and am going to use the digital test tomorrow to see what it says. Definitely having a few symptoms too x

That's great! I am going to try and stop panicking m, it's so cruel that MC takes the excitement away. When I was pregnant before (when I miscarried) I had no symptoms at all but this time I feel like I have loads so I'm going to look at that as a good sign and definitely book in for a reassurance scan at 7-8 weeks just to ease my mind a little! X

Congratulations @chasingmyrainbow and @eastview!

I had what seemed exactly like AF cramps when I got pregnant via IVF. I was so worried and no matter how many internet stories I read that said it was normal, it felt like a problem. I just wanted them to stop! The cramps were perfectly healthy- my baby is 7 months now.

Good things can happen, even after so long! Easier said than done but try to trust it. Like a PP said, how you feel won't make a difference to the outcome anyway