Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your leathers, black nail polish, air guitar and jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling. All welcome! (Part 17)

[MarathonMama]

Hello! Just miscarried and ready to start again, come and join us...

Waves to whatso glad you're feeling brighter today...do you think AF will be gone soon...hope so and that she doesn't overstay like last time! Well done with the running...I always end up feeling as though I'm about to pass out stop breathing if I try running...think it just disagrees with my body!! At least that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it!!

OMG Manda! please, please, please POAS soon. I don't think I can wait until the morning. If it is BFP, how do you feel about it? I know you were a bit wobbly before.

IQ so glad the bleeding has stopped. As everyone has said, bleeding in early pg is common although I know that won't help you feel any better. Got everything crossed for you. We'll all be rooting for you in the morning so let us know how it goes asap.

Pie how much spotting have you had? Could it be implantation bleeding? I had spotting this time. Only a tiny bit of pink blood when I wiped but I hadn't noticed IB with my other two pg so assumed it was AF on the way. How wrong I was!

Baby my DH was unsure about trying again straight after the mc. I think it was because I was very a bit obsessive. I was looking up fertility monitors and IVF clinics and I think it all got a bit much for him (who can blame the poor fella?). Luckily I calmed down within a few weeks and then he seemed much happier to try again. He's not been that excited by the BFP but I think, like me, he's burying his head in the sand until we're more certain of things. You may find your DH is the same, it could just be too soon for him to start thinking about trying again. I'm sure he'll come round.

MissG you're a bloody nutter. I did Body Pump once and didn't even have any weight on the stick but still couldn't lift the blinkin' thing. I won't be trying again any time soon, it was too embarrassing.

No news here, uneasiness has gone so I think it was tiredness rather than pg related . I slept for 11 hours last night, zzzz, bliss.

waves to everyone I haven't mentioned and welcomes new ladies with a

marathon Tiredness is never a sympton, is it... 11 hours sleep sounds pretty knocked up to me!

For the last hour or so I've had a dull, faint burning feeling in my uterus area.

Psychosomatic or symptom: discuss!

I shall try poas later if I can hold off peeing for another couple of hours as this early it really needs to fmu or held for a good 4-5 hours. But... just feel like a lony for even considering it. I should rediscard that temp and go back to being 5dpo even though I think I should be 3dpo... this is all too weird to jump from thinking I've only just O'd to thinking I possibly have a bfp!

Hello ladies. I look away for a minute and you go and get a whole new thread going!

Blue - glad the WTF cycle has finally ended for you :)

Baby, Hobnob and Late - so sorry you had to join us, but welcome. Passes round yet more chocolate.

Baby - I found out via a scan tht I had a MMC at 8+1. It was my first pregnancy and they said it was a blighted ovum, apparently meaning that the baby died shortly after implantation. I went for medical management (which was slightly traumatic - apparently it's not usually so intense) and by 8+4 it was all over.

It took three weeks to get a BFN and my DH and I started trying again straightaway in this cycle, though my DH was concerned about doing so (he wanted to make sure I was physically recovered as the MC really took it out of me, and emotionally, as I was pretty distraught). I'm now waiting to see if AF turns up (expected Thursday, especially as I don't "feel" pregnant, but who knows really). If she does, we'll be 'trying hard' again in about two weeks .

manda - OMG. Keep us posted.

IQ - thinking of you for tomorrow's scan. Slightly concerned by your weird dreams (the bowel thing was you right?).

I've probably missed loads, so apologies if I should have mentioned anything. waves to everybody else

Afternoon all.

Wow this has moved on again, hope to catch everyone....

Blue -your studies sound fab, hope it goes the way you want it too, very exciting for you.

Whatso - hope you are feeling better holiday is just around the corner. Hope you are getting into the spirit off it, start packing that always gets me excited.

Maraton - hope you are ok and everything is still as it should be. Thinking of you.

Baby - it is still such early days the first week or two takes some adjusting. I am sure your DH will be ready ready to start again soon. You know what men are like they have to do practical things in a crisis.

Pie - :-)

LTTBM - sorry to hear that you have had to join us, but this thread is very lucky. It takes time to adjust but it will pass and become easier to cope with. 37 is still young. Wait till you are knocking on 40 and trying...... we will get there.

IQ - really do have everything crossed for you REST UP and hope the scan goes well tomorrow.

Hobnob - give yourself time and space you will be feeling better soon. Be kind to yourself it is a loss and needs to be treated like any other.

Miss G - hope the LBT did not finish you off. Wouldn't get me near the gym but then that is why I am struggle through WW - weigh in tonight think of me. :-)

Lastly Manda OMG OMG OMG BFP go you.

Hope everyone is ok. Off to the dentist this afternoon - think of us. Had terrible day so it will top it off nicely.

Ooooh... Lovely new thread Marathon!

Thank you MandaHugNKiss, Blue, Summerbird, Missgiraffe and Whatsoever. I'm still in denial really. Like, it's not really real until I see a heartbeat this time. Feel really sick today, strange how that has made me feel better in a way!

I'm still lurking Missgiraffe, been doing double shifts at work so not been online as much as I'd like.

Sorry for everyone's BFNs, but crossing my fingers it won't be long now.

Prunes hey? If you really want to get a reaction, try combining prunes/prune juice with apple juice!

Babysaurus, Sorry for your loss. I was going to wait to ttc, but I found that I very quickly changed my mind once the mc was over. Your DH obviously cares a lot about you, but once he sees you're safe and well again, he may well change his mind about trying again.

Welcome too Hobnob, how was work? Sometimes it's nice to be distracted.

LateToThis glad you are feeling positive, it will be fun trying again! Good luck next week.

MandaHugNKiss Wooh! Can't wait for you to test again tomorrow!!

Insomnia Queen God, I have everything crossed for you tomorrow. Your sister sounds just what you need right now.

Oh dear, I'm not feeling so positive today, have found it rather hard to get through a day at work and actually had a little weep at my desk - and then I read your post Manda and it set me right off! So I'm sitting here typing through tears and feeling all sorts of emotions all at the same time...

The bleeding has nearly stopped, but I know the pip is still in there because I saw it yesterday. So I'm walking around technically still pregnant but knowing it's not going anywhere. I'm just waiting, waiting waiting. I want it out and gone so that I can get on with things, but bizarrely I don't want to let it go, and I feel so protective over it because it was so wanted and it's still my baby isn't it - even though it's dead and never got further than 4 weeks. It's safe inside me now, but as soon as it comes out it's going to just be flushed down the toilet or something and it's like I'm abandoning it. This is just so irrational

I'm all over the place, sorry for pouring all this out, I hope I haven't upset anyone

Oh late please don't worry about sharing stuff here - it's a safe place to chat and we're all here to listen...having had similar but different situations all of us can relate to what you're saying. I know that for me the only way I coped waiting for my next scan...with no bleeding or cramps at all...was the fact that I had only seen an empty sac on my scan - blighted ovum - so had to tell myself I wasn't carrying much around with me IYSWIM...I think your situation is much harder in that sense. Your feelings are totally normal and natural and you shouldn't beat yourself up for them at all. Do you have to stay at work much longer this evening...could you stay at home tomorrow? I know I definietly couldn't have managed at work if I had been bleeding not knowing quite what was going to happen next. Sending big [hugs] your way...

Late just wanted to add a sympathetic ear. I had my scan one day and ERPC the next because my baby was long gone (8-9 weeks when should have been 12+3) but if I was having to wait around I would have all the mixture of emotions you are feeling.

Hang on in there, there's no two ways about it: it's crappy just now.

Hi ladies and welcome to the new ladies, so sorry you have had to join us but we're here to help/support in any way we can

Just wanted to pop on to say Late I can really empathise with what you are saying. I mc at 6 (ish) weeks whilst travelling back from Greece on holiday. I remember thinking like you that it was horrible and wrong to be doing something so callous as flushing my baby away. I remember thinking I am leaving it behind in some dodgy hotel in Athens, I can't really describe how terrible that felt - one of the bleakest moments of my life. Its making me teary just thinking about it....

On a more positive note, to answer the questions from peeps about the festival I am going to its the Cambridge Folk Festival, don't know much about folk music but sounds like it could be very good fun - camping for 4 days. I am a bit worried that I will miss DS a lot (not DH though funnily enough ) but it will be great to have a break and to spend time with my mum.

IQ hope that all goes well tonight and tomorrow for your scan. Please let us know how you get on - I have everything crossed for you! If it is of any comfort with DS I had some light bleeding at about 7 weeks and everything was just fine.

Right, DS in bed, washing on, kettle on - beckons swiftly followed by some methinks...

Late just wanted to say please don't worry about sharing whatever you're feeling on here and that I empathise. Any chance you could take the day off tomorrow, or maybe work from home so you're comfortable and can see how you do? I've been all over the place the last few days and so has DH, I know we need time to heal. Work was OK today - it's helping me to keep busy - but yesterday wasn't good and I don't know how I'll feel tomorrow. One day at a time.

Fingers crossed for you tomorrow Manda and thanks again everyone for the kind welcome to the thread.

Late, as the others said, we've all unfortunately been there so if you want to vent you've come to the perfect place (says she the newbie!) Can I just add, and I hope this doesn't hit raw nerves, if the "pip" is still there you may be offered ERPC or 'medical management' (they tried and tried to get me to have the medical management option but eventually related and booked me for an ERPC although it didn't matter in the end as my body took things into it's own hands). I asked stuff about it on a thread about the time I had the longest week in the world and will put the link if you like (when posted this.) One of the things I was given the option for when I was discharged was whether I wanted it (I can't refer to it as my baby, it'll start me off, so want to keen it impersonal for headfuck reasons) cremated, buried in the hospital grounds or to take it home. I was very surprised at this as it was mainly (although I didn't rummage through it, obviously) clots and things and thought that these things just went in an incinerator. I am guessing that my hospital isn't the only one which would do this, so perhaps yours will too. I realise it's still shitty but perhaps a little less shitty than flushing something down the loo or in the bin...?

As for you being irrational, don't be ridiculous! Firstly, you are not at all and secondly, even if you were, you have the perfect grounds to!

Thanks to those who have told me what their DH's / DP's were like about both the miscarriage and TTC. I think whoever said that men like to have a practical answer to things are right, and as there is no practical solution to a miscarriage as such they don't know what to do. I guess it is VERY eary days anyway, I only stopped using sanitary towels two days ago, so there is plenty of time for him to get his head around things. Also, good news on the house front is that his parents and his brother are possibly coming, but staying in a holiday cottage, for a week to help us get going with the house. My poor DH is both working and doing the house, I have been especially useless of late, so this is great news. Perhaps solid progress there will make a definate difference to his frame of mind. Fingers crossed!

Even though I am a relative newcomer to this lovely thread, I am also in a state of excitement about Manda peeing on a stick as well as having crossed so much they are starting to cramp for IQ's scan tomorrow.

This is the ERPC / Medical Management thread I mentioned, Late, which may be some use. Weirdly, just looking back on oldish posts (barely a fortnight old too) it does seem a lot longer ago than it actually was. I can only think that that is a good thing.

late feel free to unload here - it's what were here for!!!! I know exactly what you mean - there is that little bit of you that feels guilty I kept saying to DH "I'm their mother - I should have protected them".....it is totally irrational and there was nothing that I or anyone could have done but you still feel these things. Try to let yourself just feel what your feeling and don't try to expect too much from yourself at such an early stage.

Hope your home and relaxing now!!! Xxx

It is such an enormous help talking to people who have been through it too, I have found it invaluable. The Miscarriage threads were fab too, at the time, but now feel ready to 'graduate' back up to the conception one's (if that makes sense!)

IQ hope you're a vision of tranquility!

oh my life - i know i have been away for four days but i cannot keep up! so apologies as i have only skimmed the two threads; however, a big welcome to baby late and hobnob and big hugs to marathon and IQ - i shall be checking the thread tomorrow for IQ updates; just to say that i had light bleeding for a day with DS, and all was well, i am keeping everything crossed for you.

thank you for sharing your sad stories on addiction on the last thread, and am sorry there are some of us who have experienced this with family, i just wanted to echo your thoughts on the sad death of Amy Winehouse, i too am getting at the insensitive comments on facebook. at the end of the day there is a father and a mother who tried everything they could within their power to get her out of the spiralling addiction. (her dad even begged the general public to stop buying her records or giving her awards).

anyway onto lighter subjects - DH and i had an amazing time in Edinburgh, we ate sushi, drank wine, shopped, drank champagne, drank gin, drank wine, drank beer (god we were dog rough!). and DS had a fab time with his nanna and grandad

anyway - i shall try and catch up with the posts tomorrow so sleep well everyone xx

Evening all...after all that mention of alcohol by summer i'm thinking a nice glass of might be a good idea though it might send me right off to sleep! After busy day at work I'm trying to study as deadline looming...have made some progress though am now v v tired and have been a little distracted checking up on everyone here with so much going on today

IQ really hoping you can sleep tonight and that all is well at your scan in the morning! Make sure your sis looks after you...though sounds as though she's pretty good at that!

manda how's that nice padded room we put you in earlier for your metalling before POAS again in the morning? Really hoping it's good news for you and not a cruel evap line playing havoc with your emotions!

marathon yeah for 11 hours sleep!! I wish...that sounds heavenly! My brain too full of work, studies, AF etc to relax enough for that much sleep...then again I suspect a small bean is helping you with all those zzzzz

summer so glad you had a good weekend in Edinburgh...one of my favourite cities but just so far away from London which is pants! DH has never been to Scotland and I love it...need to get him to Edinburgh and up the West coast to explore all the places we used to go on hols when I was little!

Apologies to everyone else, a is as much as I can manage...brain officially mush...think I need some mindless TV before bed...

Poppy I love a bit of folk! Big fan of Seth Lakeman and Cara Dillon - are either of them playing?

Summer - sounds a great trip!

Welcome back summer glad you had a fab trip!

manda fingers crossed for a nice FMU line tomorrow!

IQ hope you get a decent nights sleep tonight and will be thinking of you tomorrow xx

Sorry for short post, bedtime!!! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Well I managed to sleep - had a series of strange dreams where I worked at my old uni and had to manage the building of a power sub station.....not really sure what the heck that's about - then organised a reunion of my secondary school mates....this was nice but took place in Siberia...bit random and last dream is too rude to mention!!!

Other than a coughing fit at 1am I feel pretty rested - in fairness I had 2 naps yesterday so if I didn't feel rested I would assume there is something wrong with me. Just about to get up and start getting ready.....feeling really nervous about what today is going to bring. Sis has said that if it's too much I shouldnt look and she will watch out and tell me what's happening....I hope I'm not too frightened to look but who knows how I will react when I get there. She has also promised to shake/slap me if the need arises.....sometimes I wonder if she enjoys threatening me. I asked her yesterday and she said that "it's the only way to get through to you when your being hysterical".....my sis is nothing if not honest!!!

Keeping everything crossed that all is well and hoping that it's going to be good news - I'll let you know when I get back. Xxx

Good luck IQ we'll all be thinking of you

Keeping everything crossed IQ thinking of you lots.

Thinking you may have left by now IQ but just wanted to say thinking of you lots!

manda how's that FMU doing?

late how are you feeling this morning?

I'd quite like AF to leave now so that I can start cracking on with this cycle and get some serious SWI in ...think AF has particularly made me realise how much I do want to conceive again! Also I think my secretary had her 12 week scan on Monday (not that I'm supposed to even know she's pregnant yet!) and am sure she's starting to show a bit...definitely in the chest area as she's normally quite [ahem] small there, but as she's petite generally I think it's all starting to show...I seem to have a strange fascination with whether she's showing yet maybe it's just me thinking of where I would've been up to and how it might've compared...think it would've been 20 week scan anytime nowish though I don't really want to go and check exactly but onwards and upwards, must get on with the day and get myself off to work! Hope to hear some good news today!!

thanks for all your lovely messages, I was actually already at home when I had my meltdown (just as well!) and DH came home to find me in bits on the sofa! We had a really good howl together and I think it did us both good.

Thanks for the link babysaurus I'm going to have a good look at that, I didn't realise I actually had any options here, I thought I was at the mercy of nature & the medics!

I'm really glad I've found this thread, have bookmarked it and will return once all this is over - while I'd love to be getting on with trying again, I physically can't do so just yet, so I'll come back when it's all settled a bit. Yesterday's emotional tidal wave surprised me somewhat and it's dawning on me that this is actually a longer and more complicated process than just being told you're mc one day, sorting it out and getting on with making a new one the next.

Thanks again, & see you in a couple of weeks

FFS! I am none the wiser. Why? I woke around 4.30am to temp. REalised my mouth had been open when I woke up (such a good look, no?) so when that temp was kinda lower than I'd have liked I silently cursed, but didn't worry too much... then as I was drifting off I decided to get up for a wee. And there went my fmu. Did. Not. Think.

GAH!