Who hosts?

[D20]

Is it expected of you and do you enjoy it?

We’re sorted for this year but next Christmas might come with some expectations shall we say and while we’re okay to be occasional hosts we don’t think we want it to become the default that we will always host. Is that fair of us?

We have hosted for the past 20 years. My parents and siblings and their families and dh’s mum and sis and her family. Obvs during covid we couldn’t do this. Last year we went to SIL - even our dc said never again 😂
We like hosting and because we’ve been doing it so long we know what to cook, timings, drinks, music, games etc

In practice I like hosting, occasionally. It doesn't even happen for huge family occasions simply because we have a small house so don't really have the room, either around a dinner table or for people to stay. We live enough distance from most family to warrant an overnight stay.

I think if we did live closer/had a bigger house, we might become the default option and I wouldn't like that. I like hosting when it's a choice, not a chore.

I think just be really upfront with people as early as possible to manage their expectations, you are not doing anything wrong by declining to host.

Move it round each year.
Especially if you have a larger family.

When I was a kid my grandparents probably hosted the most frequently but sometimes it was my mum and sometimes we would all go to my uncle and aunt... That way the burden was shared around. Generally somone at Christmas dinner would offer to host for next year and if nobody did it would probably default to my grandparents

I host every year. Biggest house and only decent cook. I don't actually mind the cooking and eating bit tbf it's the hours before and after that get on my nerves. I'd like a bit of time to myself as it's my birthday but it's a long slog Christmas Day and Boxing Day. I'm looking forward to 27th when I ban all visitors tbh.