quick question on willys/foreskin and what to do with them!!

[neverlookback]

my ds is 2.8yo, now as ive never had a willy i dont know what is the correct thing to be doing with it!! Ive been told that from around now (he has just potty trained so is playing with his willy a lot more) I should be encouraging him to pull his foreskin back when hes in the bath etc, i have done this but it seems so tight, the hole at the end is tiny, will this just eventually stretch and then it will be able to be fully pulled back or is this too soon to be encouraging this? Ds is quite enjoying showing us what he can do with it he thinks its brilliant!!

DP says he was never told to do any of this and we should leave him alone but im getting conflicting advice from my friends who have boys! Should i take him to the doctors to get it checked?

help

short answer: if it is not red/bothering him nothing.
at this age it is still glued to the tip, it should loosen around the 3.5-4y mark.
when he gets a bit older, encourage him to pull back and wash himself with a flannel.

get him to keep trying to pull it back whilst in the bath, like you have been doing. In most case this will work - eventually.

be very careful my ds now 6 has the same problem and it did become infected which was absolutely excruciating for him. Sounds like a tight foreskin. The doctor told us to pull it back regularly when he has a bath. There is also a cream you can get that will help don't know the English name of it sorry.

i've got 3 boys and am leaving well alone for as long as possible! my oldest is only 3, can't remember what age i read they should start cleaning but am sure it's too early/not necessary yet.

You don't have to do anything. :) It is very normal for the foreskin to still be attached at that age and you shouldn't force it back at all.

no need to do anything to it unless he is getting infections. DS is 4 1/2 years and he can retract it now (but couldnt at your ds's age) and I encourage him to pull it back a bit when he gets showered but dont do anything to it myself.

brilliant, thanks for your help ladies, im sure everything is fine and he will work it all out himself in time!!!

All foreskins are different and it's guesswork knowing what to do for the best. If you leave it well alone he could have a tight foreskin which needs circumcising in late childhood or as a teen or adult. Very painful and embarrassing.

And, if you or he pulls it back too early, it breaks the protective adhesions and there is always chance of introducing infections underneath which can sometimes only be cured by circumcision.

Knowing when it is just the age for retraction to be tried and achieved and personal hygiene (which he may skip!) started and supervised is a real challenge for parents. TBH most boys are best left to work it out for themselves with a bit of advice from parents which can be included in sex education. Most will be OK an unfortunate few won't be.

I solved this dilemma by having my boys circumcised soon after birth when it is quick and simple with LA and leaves no memory.

from memory i think it eventually happened for him around the age of 4 or 5. Would never have had him circumcised as a form of prevention as, as you can see, it's very common for the early years to have it tight like this - but that's a whole different discussion thread....

Strange reason to get your sons circumcised so you don't have to worry about when they can retract their foreskin.
How odd.

DS was referred to a paediatrician when he was aged 9 as his foreskin was still very tight.
We thought he would need to be circumcised. He told us the latest thinking based on research was that this corrects itself eventually in all but very rare cases, usually after puberty sets in and sometimes as late as 16/17.
We left it and he was right. It loosened up when DS was 12.