first time nanny employer - help needed please

[silverfrog]

We are looking to employ a nanny to help wiht our 2 girls, probably a live in nanny.

What kind of hours are usual? I have seen threads talking about 50 hour weeks - is this normal?

Can we include regular babysitting as part of the contract? (surely part of the bonus of a live in nanny?) if so, does it come out of the 50 hours, with say an afternoon off in exchange, or is it on top of the regular week (and so presumeably paid on top, or not?)

duty wise all things child related are the norm, I am assuming. my girls are gluten and dairy intolerant - I am assuming it os ok for me to ask that she learns how to make gf bread etc, as part of cooking for the children?

hmmm, i had a few ore questions, but have temporarily forgotten them, so will be back later no doubt

oh yes, can anyone point me in the direction of a template contract as a starting point?

thank you

What kind of hours are usual? I have seen threads talking about 50 hour weeks - is this normal? - YES, perfectly normal.

Can we include regular babysitting as part of the contract? - BABYSITTING counts as part of normal hours - you need to agree with nanny if she takes extra time off in exchange via soem time off in exchange, or if she gets paid extra on top. It is only with Au Pairs that you get a 'free night' thrown in on top of the timetabled hours.

duty wise all things child related are the norm, I am assuming. my girls are gluten and dairy intolerant - I am assuming it os ok for me to ask that she learns how to make gf bread etc, as part of cooking for the children? YES, perfectly normal, though you would need to cover any training costs or wahtever.

oh yes, can anyone point me in the direction of a template contract as a starting point? CAT me and I will send you mine.

thank you

thank you, I will CAT you.

My dd1 has SN (ASD), and currently we are having issues with bedtime/sleep. we have to sit with her until she falls asleep (we are withdrawing, and have managed to get to the point where we are outside the room, and there is a structured plan in place to ensure the withdrawal continues)

do you think it is reasonable to ask that the nany sits there (as part of paid hours) a couple fo times a week? It is sort of like babysitting, but the seating plan is restricted, at least until dd1 falls asleep (usually about 9.30pm, so about a hour and a hald of sitting (comfortably) outside dd1's room... Is it reasonable to ask someone else to do this? We view it as part of our lives, and it is somehting that has crept up on us, so not sure what to think, tbh (have advertised job as SN nanny, so applicants already know some duties may not be the "norm" so to speak.

As long as you're paying for the time, I think you can reasonably ask a nanny to do anything directly relating to the children and their care.

Can't see why not Silverfrog

I am guessing you have recipe books for meal prep.

I feel that you need to make it clear to applicants that the job involves caring for a child with SN. If you tell applicants what the duties are, then the applicant can choose if they want to apply for the job or not.

I'll be honest and say that it could put some nannies off. However other nannies want to gain SN experience thus may jump at the chance.

With regard to the evening work, as long as you make it clear that evening work is involved then I can't see there being an issue. You may find it best to fix the evenings that are to be worked, so that both you and your nanny know that say every Tuesday and Thursday evening, your nanny is on evening duty.

we are definitely making it clear that SN involved. After all, we want (need!) thi to be a success, and there's no point getting someone on board who cannot (or doesn't want to) cope

the main interviewer will be dd1, tbh - if she doesn't get on with the nanny, then it's not going to work - there's no negotiating with ASD.

we will be upfront abut the type of duties we expect (and we want to be reasonable - the idea is not to just hand over all the harder bits of having dd1 around, but at the same time, the pooint of hiring someone is to give us a bit of a break at times) and then take it form there.

good to know that generally speaking we are not being wildly unrealistic in our expectations.

silverford everything you want seems reasonable!

yes 50 hours + 2 evenings (mon - thur) babysitting a week are normal....

and i cant see that making GF bread etc (I assume you have a bread machine?) is at all unreasonable!

I regularly bake bread etc at work (though just normal bread... yummmmmm fresh bread!)

the main interviewer will be dd1, tbh - if she doesn't get on with the nanny, then it's not going to work - there's no negotiating with ASD.

How very true. This is why I always meet families I babysit for prior to actually doing any babysitting - even if their child does not have ASD (though I do seem to babysit for quite a few children on the spectrum).

It will all boil down to the applicant and how they get on your DD1. If the applicant has a 'can do' attitude and has the patience of a saint, then it could work well. Finding that ideal person who remains clam in whatever situation presents itself is going to be hard... but not impossible. I feel they need endless patience, knows when to go with the flow and when that isn't appropriate, is very consistent in how they deal with things, is firm but kind.

It's not going to be easy to find someone but you may get lucky. I'd suggest trying asking around your NAS group to see if anyone knows of anyone suitable - you never know, someone might know someone ideal.

agree, nannynick.

we have been lucky twice before - once with a maternity nanny when dd2 was born, and then again last year with a mother's help. both got on brilliantly with dd1 (or should i say dd1 got on with them ), and were fantastic.

dd1 is quite easygoing, really, as far as ASD is concerned, btu you are right when you say "knows when to go with the flow and when that isn't appropriate" - that is the key, imo. sometimes you need to give in (when you wuoldn't do so with an NT child), and sometimes you need to hold out (when you wouldn't with an NT child) - not easy !

50hrs for live in is normal, actually very nice live in hours, often live in can be 12hrs a day - i know many live out who do those hours

bs isnt normally part of contract if live out, but live in often includes 1/2nights

i have no problem making bread, and sure gf isnt that hard, as long have recipe and a bread maker makes life easier

good luck

I do 60 hours a week, live-in. I also have one night babysitting included but my employers very rarely use it. One thing I insist on in my contract is that they cannot carry over babysitting. i.e. if they don't go out one week, they cannot ask me to do two nights (unpaid) the following week.

If you are up-front in the interview, you can pretty much ask a nanny to do anything child related that you want, the nanny then chooses whether or not to accept the position should they be offered it!

thanks everyone, this has been very helpful. we have had a few responses to our ad, so hopefully we are on our way to finding uor nanny!

just to clarify, when people are saying babysittign included in live-in contract, is this as part of offered gross wage? or paid on top?

completely agree, callaird, that babysitting shoudl not be carried across - that could end up being a total PITA.

if live in then at least one night a week is normally included in weekly wage

As a live-in you can include the evenings babysitting in the their weekly wage, I will only babysit unpaid mon-thurs evenings, fri to sun are part of the weekend and I get paid for babysitting then.

I had one family who wanted me to do a week with the children while they went away, they said that as they hadn't used me to babysit every week then I would have to do 8 days straight including weekends to pay it back!! Incidentally, I said no and quit a few weeks later. There were other problems but that was the final straw!

what a cheek from them!

callaird - I presume that's why you now have the clause about not carrying over babysitting

I have learnt alot in 23 years of being a nanny, I have loads of extra clauses in my contract that weren't in my earlier ones!!

I just explain to prospective employers why I have put them in, if they don't want them in them I know that they are likely to be more unreliable, so carry on looking!