CM and cloth nappies

[belleface]

regular lurker / occasional poster here - hope this is the right place to post this... just after some advice really...

DD is 13mo and has been going to a CM since the start of january. she has a great time and has settled really well so we're generally happy.

when looking for a CM, we wanted to find one that would use our cloth nappies and she said she was happy to, and that she'd used them herself years ago with her own kids.

however, after a couple of days there DD developed a horrible nappy rash and it seems to have started because the CM (and/or her assistants) didn't notice that DD had done a poo and so she wasn't changed that quickly. i admit it can be difficult to tell when she's done a poo as you can't smell it like you can with a disposable. the CM was really concerned about the rash and worried that DD was in pain.

we switched to disposables for the time she is there (3 days a week) and the rash is fine now. i think the CM is happier using them as she can tell straight away when DD has pooed (and sometimes this is 4-5 times a day ). however, i'd really like to go back to using the cloth nappies when she's there as i just prefer them etc.

am i asking too much to ask her to try them again? i don't want to make her feel uncomfortable but at the end of the day all i expect is that DD is changed regularly, which i think is understandable. but i don't want the CM to be constantly worrying about having to check DD in case she's done a poo.

advice appreciated!

I don't think you are being unreasonable but if you are concerned about your CM worrying, could you talk it through with her?

If your childminder really can't tell if your baby is uncomfortable I think using disposables isn't unreasonable, especially if you don't want to deal with this horrible nappy rash again. Maybe when your daughter is a little older and doesn't poo as much you can go back to using cloth nappies.

Your childminder sounds lovely and caring so I would do what she feels is best for your daughter. A good childminder is hard to find.

The childminder is presumably a lot busier with other children too than you are at home, so it's understandable that it's harder for her to notice a poo immediately. It sounds like she poos a lot too! I would rather stick with disposables and avoid nappy rash.

Hi

I'd second Jilted's advice of just talking to her and asking her if it really is too much trouble. Our Dd is the only child in her nursery to use cloth nappies and we had to ask a few times for them to change her more often than the other children. We did feel bad for asking (felt like we were nagging to be honest) but I plucked up courage and sent DH to ask and asked if they would use them before we enrolled and we are paying them lots of money to look after her.

I'd ask, give it another couple of goes (with perhaps another couple of naggings) and then if it really isn't working for your baby, I'd give up.

Sorry, that didn't really make sense! Basically, I plucked up courage and thought to myself that I had specifically asked whether we could use cloth nappies before we enrolled her and we paid lots of money, so the least they could do was try a bit harder. I said that in a much nicer way, though, of course!

Have to agree you can't smell poo easily in cloth nappies

2 of my temp jobs use cloth and I hate them :(

Girl always seems to have sore red bum :( and mum also doesn't like using wipes so use wet flannels that come with nappies and hard to get semi dry poo off skin :(

Have to say the smell after a long sleep / overnight is rank as well. The smell of wee is awful / almost like a pissy tramp :(

One job a I do regularly I said to mum could I use disposables and she brought me some :)

Obv a cm has lots of children and may not notice / smell the poo and if this causing a rash I would let her use disposables

If the nappies have a pissy/ammonia smell it's probably from a build up of detergent on the fibres - let the mum know she needs to strip wash them by washing them first cold then hot without any detergent until no soap suds comes out of them during the wash.

I have mentioned this to her as have several friends who love real nappies nutters but she says they are fine

I have gagged when changing her in the morning after 12hrs in nappy and eyes water at the ammonia smell :(

Op if you discussed real nappies and cm agreed then go back to them and see how bum is

I have turned down a perm nanny job as used real nappies - the smell /sore bums is bad enough but you take so much out with you with bag for dirty/wet nappies which is horrible scrapping off the poo a few hours later when home

I look after a toddler who uses real nappies, and it was tricky to get the hang of when he had done a poo, but I learned and now it's not a problem.

I think maybe now your DD has had a chance to settle and your CM has had a chance to get to know her and how she usually is, it might be worth a try at least as the CM should be able to notice the difference in her behaviour.

FWIW I also look after a little boy who uses disposables and he can develop the most godawful bleeding nappy rash in a heartbeat, so I think it's as much about a child's skin sensitivity as it is the kind of nappy you use.

I don't think it's too much to ask her to try them again, as long as you're prepared to accept that she might want to carry on using disposables.

thanks all for your responses, much appreciated.

i think i'll chat to the CM about it but perhaps leaving it until DD goes slightly less often please when will this happen?! and/or she's able to communicate better that she's done something might be a good idea.

it will be good to keep the discussion open with the CM and let her know that's i'm still keen to use them sometime (and see how she feels about it) rather than just turning up with an armload of cloth one day and shoving them on her

thanks again

and also blondes FWIW i second thescience's advice about the mum needing to strip-wash the nappies - ours started to smell a while back but now strip-washed are fine.

i definitely wouldn't feel comfortable with DD wandering around in smelly nappies. and i certainly wouldn't want someone else looking after her to have to put up with it. it's not nice at all.

I'm a childminder who uses cloth nappies and wipes on my own babies. I clearly wouldn't have a problem with using them on my mindees.

I find that strip washing makes absolutely no difference at all to the smell. We use eco washing liquid with plenty of rinses, never had suds at the end of the wash, just some children have smellier wee than others!

It's also worth noting that my DS would happily sit in his own poo for hours if i didn't change him. If it wasn't for the almighty grunting sound he makes, i would never know! I have to physically look into his nappy through a leg hole to check sometimes. It might be worth asking her to change nappies ever 1.5-2 hours instead of just when the nappy feels wet, so there is less of a chance of this happening again.

I have to agree that some children will be miserable and show it the moment they are even damp, whilst others happily sit in their own poo indefinitely, and some of those don't really give any sign that they are "doing one" either! It will obviously be harder to spot subtle signs if there is a lot going on.

maybe my lo does have smellier wee then others? not sure, but i have advised mum to strip wash the nappies and she wont, so smell is horrible - this has been going on for over a year that i have looked after her on and off :(

you can lead a horse to water but you cant make them drink

and yes some children/babies will happily sit in poo so really hard to pinpoint the time they poo unless check every 5 mins :(

My daughter started with a CM in January and we also use cloth nappies and have been having nappy rash problems. We just about get it cleared when we have 3 days straight with her and then it flares up again at the CM. I don't really know why it is as she gets through the same amount of nappies we would in a day. She has been happy to have advice on them and when I asked her to change DD an additional time per day (as she was not changing her very often at all at first). She actually said she didn't think disposables vs. cloth would make much different, DD is obviously just going through phase of pooing a lot (sounds like we have the same child!). As a middle ground I do put liners in the nappies for the CM as she finds it easier to manage disposing of the poo and doesn't have to worry about slathering on nappy cream. So you could do that and see if it improves?

yes i guess DD does poo a lot and also she doesn't seem that bothered being sat in it (although sometimes she'll get upset if she's napping and she goes then she'll cry and that's the end of nap-time!) so it is hard to tell. at home sometimes it seems like me or DH are checking every five minutes by looking into the nappy, which is obviously not something i can expect the CM to do as she'd never get anything else done!

i was hoping to chat to her about it the afternoon when i picked DD up but she had to come home early as she was under the weather . next time!