Almost feeling suffocated by nanny in home

[Sheissmallandveryspidery]

I have a brilliant day nanny. She is great with the kids- a little bit strong in doing things her way at times but overall she is fab.

The issue is me. I cannot bear having her(or anyone - it's not personal) in my home. I feel panicky that there isn't anywhere left that is my space. I really need space and solitude and early have people over (but go out lots instead) as I dislike having people in my house.

I just feel suffocated that I don't have anywhere private anymore . House is too small to shut off certain rooms.

Even worse is when she has people around that i don't know. I feel dreadful about this, I feel judged but people I don't even know. I just hate it.

I know I need to lighten up and unclench and all that but this is my home and I feel uncomfortable. I think the only cure is to find different Childcare but that would compromise kids (though significantly help my creaking finances).

Anyone else felt like this?

I know what it's like to feel your home is invaded but this is for a finite period of time, you can end it if you need to, it helps your children and your bedroom is always your space. Just think of how helpful this arrangement is and make an effort to be friendly and welcoming. With children you have to give up the control of the perfect environment and she is only there during the day.