third degree tear questions

[roseability]

I had DD on 16th June. Despite a lovely waterbirth I sustained a 3rd degree tear

She was large at birth (9lbs 8 ounces) but my second baby (first was 9lbs forceps delivery) and it was a relaxed birth

I don't understand why I tore so badly? Also when did other mums resume their sex life after a 3rd degree tear? When did you exercise again?

Did you have to have a caesarean for subsequent births?

Thanks!

Have the midwives given you any idea why the tear occured? Could have just been the position lo was in? Might have just been the size as you say?

My ds was only 6lb 5oz but due to being back to back with his arm above his head like superman.

Sex life resumed after about 12 weeks but I wanted to make sure everything was 'ok'. Has been fine ever since . Now pg with DC2!

Gradually got back in to excercise, went on long walks etc

Saw consultant who said i've healed well and should be fine for vaginal birth this time, think it depends on the individual and how you heal.

Sex was not on agenda for around 6 months, and I had no tears, due to fantastic midwife

I had a third degree tear after my first child (9lbs 8oz). What did the damage were the rotational forceps. I had numerous infections afterwards but luckily managed not to have any feacal incontinence issues which are linked to 3rd degree tears.

We had sex about 5 months afterwards (mainly because I had infections for the first 3 months and was so traumatised and scarred that I couldn't face it).

For my second I was advised to have an elective there was too much risk of it happening again. I really couldn't face it. The elective was fantastic and in comparison to a third degree tear my recovery was a walk in the park.

Good luck and my heart goes out to you a third degree tear is traumatic. If you decide to go for a Vbac next time or C-section it is your choice.

By the way I have heard that tearing in water births is really common because the mid wife can't see so clearly about when to push and when not. Unfortunately if you had a 3rd degree tear without any instrumental intervention it could be just the bad luck of the baby's position as they came out versus your vagina.

I too had a third degree tear with DS2 who was born 11 weeks ago. My labour was pretty good, and done with gas and air. The midwife thinks I tore as I went from 1-2 cms dilated to fully dilated quite fast( about 90 mins!) and so she said my body hadn't had chance to adjust and stretch accordingly.

11 weeks on, all is healing well. Resumed sex at about 6 weeks and it was ok. I was v nervous about it but it was nowhere near as bad as expected!! I am now excercising too. I started with the Wii Fit as thats quite gentle and you can build up gradually. I started that at about 3 weeks post partum. I just need to do a bit of work on my pelvic floor but other than that, al is ok. As far as next baby is concerned, they mentionned probably having to have a CS but I guess the final decision will be made nearer the time.

Roseability

My hospital have a 'birth afterthoughts' service where a dedicated midwife will visit you in your own home and go through a bit of a post match analysis to help you work out what happened and what to do different (if anything) next time.

I had 3rd degree tear with ds2 (ds1 an em c/s), and I can't rem when we started having sex again but he has a brother 2 years younger so definitely some time within the next 15 months! Not sure about exercise either - prob not for quite a long time - and I still wear a panty liner if I'm going to be doing any running/cross-training - just in case of small leaks

I was advised to have a c/s with ds3, but the reason given was the extent of nerve damage caused by ds2 birth and tear. I had quite extensive investigations with a 'bum doctor' to find out how bad the damage was - all pretty managable for me, btw, but the docs didn't want another natural birth to make things worse.