Is it wrong to feel so gutted?

[staylucky]

Have been told in pretty much no uncertain terms that I will have to have a section in 2 weeks due to baby's position.

I'm trying really hard to get my head around it.

I don't want to cause my baby any harm, of course I want what's best.

I'm not saying that anyone who ever had a section got an easy option.

I'm just really totally disappointed in myself that for some reason I couldn't pull this off without help. After a failed ecv on Tuesday the midwife basically said that I should be thankful for the opportunity of a section because nature had a way of making descions for you. Meaning that left to my own natural devices my baby would suffer or die?!

I will of course go along with what i'm told because I could never face myself if they were right and something went wrong but I can't help feeling this way.

If it's any consolation at all I was told at 39 weeks that my baby was breech and told I'd pretty much have to have a section.

I was scanned a few days before my EDD and she wasn't breech. I had a horrible natural delivery though and thought afterwards that I would have much preferred the ECS. It's probably of little comfort to you but just wanted you to know that the grass is not always greener!

Totally agree with CurryMaid - don't want to scare you with my birth story but it was bloody awful and a section would have been infinitely preferable. I very much doubt I'd have felt cheated in any way, in fact, I'd have enjoyed the first few months of DS's life a lot more... what I'm trying to say, very inarticulately, is that it's all a matter of perspective and we absolutely, completely understand how disappointed you are and will be crossing all available appendages that your little man turns and engages in time.

I wonder if maybe you have a condition we quacks chiropractors call In-Utero Constraint. It can make it difficult for babies to turn head-down and engage, but it can (in a lot, but not all cases) be corrected by a technique called Webster's Breech Turning Technique (also Webster's in-Utero Constraint Technique). You could try Googling it and seeing if any chiros in your area can do it. I wish I could help you but I'm on the West Coast of Canada so not much practical use to you. I've used it on a number of patients though and I'd it works in 7-8 out of 10 cases.
Some things you can do on your own to open your pelvis are

• deep squats, knees wide apart while trying to keep your heels down. This stretches the inner thigh muscles which attach by your pubic bone as well as helps to open up the "bowl" of the pelvis
• the inverted position to encourage the baby to turn: if you have stairs in your house, go to the bottom of the stairs, get on hands and knees and back your knees up several stairs until you're head down. Stay there for a minute or two, several times a day.
• sit on a birthing ball with knees wide apart - another pelvis opener

If nothing works, then I guess... but hopefully you can enjoy the experience somehow. Will be thinking of you and watching for a birth announcement!

Jacksmamma, I'm seeing my chiro again this week. He doesn't specifically 'do' the websters technique but has said he knows that adjustment can be beneficial.

When I saw him last week he didn't attempt any adjustment prefers to concentrate on deep muscle massage and trigger points??! I have a great belief in the whole practise though has got me through some very shaky times with depression last year.

I will let you know x

Great! Your chiro sounds like he's right up my alley. I do soft tissue work on my pg patients as well. For what it's worth, I usually work the iliopsoas (right inside the hip bone) and the piriformis, as well as the dorsal sacral ligaments and the sacrotuberous ligament. Works for me.

Good luck!!!!!!!

hadn't thought about that until I read mary's post, but now wonder if one reason why I didn't care about ds being born by caesarian was that my own brother was adopted and I knew it didn't make any difference to my mum or her ability to bond with him

SL I feel for you as I did a post exactly the same as yours exactly 4 years ago. I pinned so much hope that the ECV would work and it didnt and then spent a manic 2 weeks trying moxibustion, reflexology etc. I reluctantly resigned myself to a section and the day before it was scheduled I went into natural labour which was closure for me and it turned out that babys cord was wrapped around his neck and chest twice, he was trapped the poor thing , and I was so relieved that he was fine but I still felt a failure afterwards and cheated. I was lucky I had a great consultant and midwife plus a supportive partner who understood. You will be fine, your baby will be fine, your honeymoon passage will be intact (only joking) but dont be afraid to talk about it if you feel the same afterwards. Dont be fobbed off by the "be thankful you have got a healthy baby" brigade. Good luck, let us know how you do.

Hey everyone, sorry i'm late with this been so busy admiring my new baby boy!!!

He never did turn the little tinker and my waters broke before the planned cs date.
I was told that they would not allow me to labour which I thought was a bit off but then again I just wanted a safe arrival so signed consent for an emergency CS. Like two minutes later (or so it seemed) i'm being handed my litle fella.

OK it will never match the wonderful experience I had labouring with my daughter it was just too much like being at the deli counter (take a ticket your next)but fact is he's here and GOSH he's amazing. We've bonded immediately, i'm breastfeeding successfully this time (i'm so proud! ) and we can't stop grinning.

Thanks for all your kind messages and thoughts and hope you're all well x x x x

Congratulations x

Congratulations and enjoy! xxxxx

The most important thing is the health of you & your baby.
Don't feel cheeted, you've done the hard bit (9 months of not being able to see your feet)

My first was a normal average delivery, my second was an emergency C section.

The first left me feeling crappy, anaemic & very sore.
With the C section I was up & about the next day, just needed a couple of paracetamol for a day or so & NO PILES!!!!

Not trying to make light of your feelings but honestly how they caome out makes no difference as long as they come out healthy.

Congratulations!!!

OH, that's wonderful. Many congratulations, and a big big kiss for your little boy

Congratulations on the safe arrival of your little boy.

My dd was breech at 38 weeks and I was told I would definitely be having a c-section and it wasn't up for discussion. Went in for a scan to ascertain the exact position two days later and she had turned. Went in at 10 days past my due date to discuss induction and she was breech again! Lovely, lovely consultant who just happened to be there at the time managed to do what seemed like the quickest and easiest ecv ever and she stayed head down long enough for me to be induced the next day, labour was 1 and a half hours from not even slightly dilating to baby (still in her amniotic sac complete with waters) arriving on the bed like a torpedo! No time for pain relief, no-one believed I was in labour and I never made it onto the labour ward! On reflection I think a planned cs would have been less traumatic! That said, she (now 25 weeks old) was worth every bit of it and I'd do it all again for her in a heartbeat.

Again many congratulations and well done with the breastfeeding.