Queen's hospital or Newham?
Hospital/Midwife/Scan Advice
Hi all,
This is my 2nd pregnancy and I am worried about birth due to a few reasons.
My first birth was a fast traumatic one. 3 hours and 43 minutes from water breaking to birth of my son. I was 6cm when I got to hospital. It was all so fast even I didn't know what was happening.
Epidural was on my birth plan. I begged for it. They refused. Because this was a short labour, the contractions are more intense so therefore I was in extreme pain and gas and air was not cutting it and I begged gor epidural. Not given.
In the whole birth all I remember was probably 5 seconds that's it. Most of the time I think I blanked out from the pain but they wrote I was sleeping in the birth notes!
I remember them saying to me not to shout (my husband said I barely shouted or anything) and at another point they were like are you pushing, stop pushing and then they checked how far dilated I am and goes oh okay yeah push. My body was already pushing for me. And another time I could hear them saying hold your thighs...no stirrups were provided, they expected me in the throes of what felt like death to hold my own thighs while giving birth.
Here is the part it got worse. After I gave birth finally (they took gas and air off me as they said I was too tired and wouldn't be able to focus on pushing. It was 20 mins of pushing without it), this midwife came in saying time for stitches and I had the post birth shakes and said please no not now. She then proceeds to moan about being understaffed and they don't have time so I reluctantly let her and passed my son to my husband to hold as I was scared I'd drop him.
However, next thing I remember is what felt like she put her hand and arm up inside me and I just remember feeling like wind was knocked out of me. They shut me up and gas and air which did not do anything for pain. All I could remember is her saying 'I'm sorry, I'm just checking for clotting' after that ordeal I remember her saying 'and you wanted to go theatre for that?' Maybe she said something prior to doing that and I said yes please I'd like to have it done in theatre but couldn't remember. Then she proceeded to do stitches which I did not feel at all due to being traumatised from what I experienced. I genuinely believe she performed a manual removal of placenta without proper consent. Also nhs guidelines states adequate pain relief such as epidural or spinal tap must be given for this and must be performed in theatre. That's how painful it is. When I spoke to a midwife when I asked for a birth debried they dismissed this so I am in process of actually requesting my birth notes.
I was so traumatised that 3 hours after birth I was so numb. I can't recall anything. I missed out on golden hour with my son or just being able to take everything in. I developed post Natal depression as a result.
Being treated like that was atrocious as a first time mum especially. This was in Queen's Hospital in Romford. I was low risk pregnancy.
However, I and my booking appointment last week and they said there have been changes to nhs guidance or something and I'm now classed as high risk pregnancy due to some heart conditions and gastro issues and mental heath issues I believe. She also mentioned how my son was 8th centile and was small for gestational age. He was 6 pounds 3 ounces and I gave birth at 40 weeks so he should've been 7 pounds atleast apparently. This was all news to me and I felt sad.
I'm worried now because I think if you are high risk, you can't give birth in a birthing centre which I wanted to this time. My midwife who spoke to me said she was going to arrange a senior consultant to speak to me about previous birth, give me a good understanding midwife, gave me a letter to show GP about whether I need to take aspirin etc I think to prevent pre-eclampsia etc. She was lovely and seemed compassionate etc. However I'm terrified to give birth there again.
My friend gave birth in newham birthing centre and she said all doctors and midwives were fantastic. I also read reviews on reddit and newham was deemed more positive.
Both hospitals are close proximity to me. I live in goodmayes, Chadwell Heath. I'm worried I might be rejected by newham due to not actually being their Borough, I'm barking and dagenham.
If you were in my shoes what would you do?