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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

To stop breastfeeding?

4 replies

pisces5891 · 30/07/2026 19:46

I'm writing to ask what you all would do in my situation. I have a beautiful nine-week old daughter. for various reasons, From early on, We were supplementing with formula after breastfeeding. I've had plenty of advice and help. I've seen 3 different lactation Consultants, had her tongue tie cut, she sees an osteopath. But I don't see a way that we will reasonably be able to get rid of the top ups. She mainly gets top ups after midday up until the evening. And then overnight, she's exclusively breastfed into the morning when my milk supply is at its highest. I can't feed her loads during the day to increase my supply because she absolutely refuses to stay on the boob for very long. Skin to skin doesnt work. and for that reason, I'm not looking for advice on how to increase my supply.

I'm not sure how long I want to combi feed for. the benefits of comby feeding are that she's getting probably about 50 to 60% breast milk, and we have that time together on the boob, which is really special. I also can sometimes skip feeds and replace them with the bottle very easily and pump, which I've been doing a bit recently, and that's been really nice to be able to get out of the house. The downsides are that she definitely has a bottle preference, and I'd say about half of my breastfeds, finish with her crying because she gets frustrated at the slow flow, even with me doing breast compressions. it's a bit demoralising to feed her, and it ends in tears, I see friends breastfeeding and I'm pretty jealous of the fact that their baby falls happily asleep on their boob. I just don't think I'll get there with my darling girl. The other downside is that I really don't like breastfeeding in public (because it's such a wriggly experience that often ends in tears). I definitely don't think doing it outside would be helpful. And so it means that I'm a little bit more trapped at home around her feeding schedule. I find myself leaving places early to breastfeed her rather than just staying out and giving it a go. I don't think that will change unless she significantly changes over the next few weeks in terms of how she breastfeeds, but I don't think that's likely- if she's got a bottle preference, that will stay that way. I also feel bad that I'm somehow forcing her to breastfeed when she might simply be happier on the bottle. InMy situation, would you carry on comby feeding, or would you switch to formula? I'm really proud of myself for having got to 9 weeks and for her having had so much breast milk. there's a part of me that wants to continue for her sake and because it's lovely, but there's another part of me that thinks our lives will be so much easier once we switch to formula. We won't have the constant question every day of how much to top her up, which is a real conundrun sometimes! and she might be happier. I should mention, she's putting on weight beautifully. Anyway, advice appreciated, thank you.

OP posts:
Mousesandberries · 30/07/2026 19:47

You don't need to ask for permission. Do what works for you.

ImpatientlyWaitingForSummer · 30/07/2026 19:50

In your position I would move to bottle feeding, it sounds like it’s causing you both some stress and you some anxiety which is the last thing you need 9 weeks post birth! You’ve done incredibly well given all the challenges but if bottle feeding is going to alleviate some of the stress then I think that’s the way to go. For what it’s worth I combi fed my first initially and breastfeeding was just not for me for a multitude of reasons, my second was always exclusively bottle fed. Both my children are happy, healthy and thriving so please do let go of the guilt

Ponderingwindow · 30/07/2026 19:51

this is entirely your decision.

i am just going to mention that when we had this kind of issue early on the solution was an SNS. What we did. Ditch the bottles, use an SNS breastfeeding, it can hold formula or pumped breastmilk. Ideally you pump after each breastfeeding session to increase supply.

rcppab · 30/07/2026 19:52

Hi, just wanted to say I really hear you and remember exactly how this felt. You’ve done amazingly and it’s completely fine to stop breastfeeding now if it’s what’s best for you and your girl. What finally made me stop (because I had soooo much guilt) was realising how much it was upsetting and frustrating me, and remembering that a calm and happy mum is more important than the type of milk. I stopped exclusively breastfeeding at 6 weeks and pumped a bit until 12 weeks to let my supply decrease slowly. For us, formula was the best thing we could have chosen and I have absolutely no regrets. I have a healthy, strong, happy toddler who fights off infection just as well as any other kid, and it also saved my sanity!

Well done, whatever you choose, because it’s clear you love your girl soooo much and how lucky is she to have such a loving mum :) take care x

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