C section or natural

[newmumtobe1998]

So, I’ve always swayed towards an elective c section and stay am up for one, however, I recently heard you can have what they call a ‘medical’ or ‘assisted birth’ which is having the epidural and not feeling much. I have this huge fear that something will go wrong during natural labour I don’t know why, always have done so that’s why I’ve swayed more c section. However, is it worth giving natural a go?
I just always hear horror stories of people not receiving the epidural in time or short staffed etc and things going wrong.

Is anyone else in the same position?

Can you choose an elective c section ? Where I’m from they will not do a c section without good reason. Personally I’ve never had one but I’ve heard recovery is tough. I had a birth with an epidural and it was perfect . Couldn’t feel a thing and had zero pain from the moment the epidural went in. It was relaxed and for me not scary. I had a nap and the midwives told me when it was time to push. I’ve also had one without an epidural it was my second and I wanted the epidural but there was no time.. not going to lie it was painful but I was shocked and unprepared. Recovery was quicker with no epidural. You just sort of forget about the pain of childbirth not long after. Overall I preferred my epidural birth. Personally I wouldn’t dream of just going for a c section unless it was medically indicated .

I don’t think anyone can advise wherever to go for a vaginal birth or c section, only you can do that. But two points: you absolutely can have a c section for no reason at all. The guidance has changed, and they can’t say no to it now. Second point; c section recoveries don’t have to be hard. Compared to the brutal and loooong recovery from my forceps/ episiotomy/ tear birth (I’m talking many months), my c section recoveries were a dream. And no, I have not forgotten the pain of childbirth (before I had my lovely epidural) and I never ever will.

I had an elective c section because I wanted one and I’ll be having one again. It was very easy and recovery, although painful at first, was quick.

As someone who worked in maternity and delivery if I had my time again I would opt for a c-section every time. Natural birth especially for first time mums can be brutal and often end up with an episiotomy and assisted birth. I would rather take care of an abdominal wound than a vaginal 3rd degree wound

In my NCT group only one of us had a birth which didn't need any intervention (episiotomy, forceps, emergency c section etc) and that was the one who had an elective c section.

Everyone has their preferences. I knew that I'd rather have an episiotomy than a c section cut, some people feel exactly the opposite! Just got decide what would be your worst case scenario and head away from it!

Only you can weigh up the pros and cons for each. I had a vaginal birth, it was quick, easy and no tearing/trauma. I wont lie and say it didnt hurt but the pain came and went in waves. I was fully prepared on the knowedge of different pain relief and planned to have an epidural when it became too painful. However, i didnt need it. I felt really well afterwards.

I know some people have a difficult time but they can also have a difficult time with CS also.

The thing to remember, whichever way you chose is the right choice for you. Enjoy meeting your new little baby!

Whatever happens will happen. I had an epidural with first (now nearly 30!) but they messed it up and only one side of me was numb. I ended up having an emergency c-sec with him aftee 28 hours of labour... Eventually all fine but it was a long recovery.

11 years later, an elective c-sec and I was up and in the shower the next morning, lifting baby no problem. Home after 2 nights. Recovery involved a wound infection, so wasn't brilliant.

Looking back, I'd have wanted to deliver naturally if possible. The ongoing c-sec issues afterwards including lack of milk and being left with 'apron tummy'. It would be a last resort for me. Good luck either way!

It’s so different for everyone so all you can do is read others experiences and decide from that. My first was a natural birth which ended with an episiotomy and forceps but that was actually easy! I had barely any pain at all after, just felt slightly bruised for a couple of days when I sat down and the scar healed very well. My second was a c-section which was awful. I will always be traumatised by it. The pain and complications afterwards were abysmal, especially with a newborn and toddler to look after. Due to the complications I was told any further children I had would have to be via c-section so that’s made the decision for me that I won’t be having any more! But for others they have opposite stories of a c-section being easier than a natural birth.

I had two natural births and would prefer them very much over the elective c-sec with 3rd child.

Ive had 2 c sections. I was walking around with no issues the next day during my second in 2024 and barely any discomfort. Just basic painkillers and only took them as a precaution. For me an elective c section made sense as I needed some control after horrible pregnancies and late miscarriages. I also didn’t want to risk life changing birth injuries and incontinence. Wound always healed quickly. I’m a bit overweight but never had a fat belly or overhang so that likely helps with healing.

You should explore a course like Birth_Ed on instagram - online and pretty cheap. It’s really good at helping you understand natural birth physiology, choices, what to expect etc. Try the course then see how you feel would be my advice. FWIW I ended up having 2 x c sections and they really are not an easy way out. It is pretty grim being awake for major surgery, terrifying actually, and you can feel so much (not pain but loads of pulling, pushing, tugging) not fun at all

I’d a vacuum delivery and episiotomy and recovered very quickly from that so it’s not all doom and gloom if such interventions are required . Glad you recovered quickly from c sections . Not everyone is the same .

Im currently about 7 weeks and this is a decision I still need to make! I am generally panicky in a medical setting so was considering epidural but my other half things elective c section because I am very petite so he thinks it may end up eith that anyhow! Ill follow this thread with interest as yet Im still on the fence.

I have the same issue as you, I’m very tiny and petite too and struggle with things even like smears. My partner also thinks c section but it comes down to us to make the decision it’s so tricky.

I’ve had both an emcs and a VBac. If I was to have another I wouldn’t want a cs. My cs was straightforward and I was up and about quickly, driving after 2 weeks but it was still painful and I had numbness round the scar for months. I have a slight shelf now.
Had an episiotomy with the VBAC stitches were very itchy a few days after but it healed really quickly. It wasn’t a quick delivery and it was painful but it was so much easier afterwards

I’ve had two spontaneous labours and an induction turned EMCS. If I were to have another baby (I absolutely won’t be!!), I would opt for a C-section. My spontaneous labours were fine but painful - I had an epidural too late with DD1 and I was too far along with DD2 for them to give me one. I wanted another one for DS but he needed to be born earlier.

My induction with DS was very scary at the end. The C-section really was an emergency and the decision was taken out of my hands.

The reason I had never wanted a C-section before was because of the recovery afterwards. Yes, it was harder in lots of ways than recovery from spontaneous labour but it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be.

Everyone I know who had an elective C-section describes it as a really calm, lovely experience.

Elective csection always! It was actually reading MN that swayed me because there are statistics which nobody in your real life will tell you. Did you know that 30% of natural births end up in an emergency csection so chances are high you will have to get it done anyway. There is also a 42% chance of birth injury. Obviously to varying degrees, but that is a massive number for a completely unnecessary and potentially life changing injury.

I'm honestly not joking in that I think many women who were injured through childbirth stay quiet and still promote natural birth out of spite and anger. If they had to suffer, why should anyone else get the easy way out with an ELCS? Because statistically, you will still get overwhelming support for natural birth despite almost half of that population being seriously injured through it. You may hear the odd joke about leaking wee when sneezing, not being able to go on trampolines etc and that's just the tip of the iceberg. A huge number of marriages end up breaking down because the woman is physically disfigured or simply unable to have intimacy anymore.

What nobody likes to talk about is that yes, your partner will also care. Having a baby in itself brings enough upheaval for a relationship. But if that comes with the wife being unable have sex then it's a nail in the coffin for the relationship. And you can have the most loving and understanding husband in the world but if there are going to be wee or poo involved in the process of intimacy, then it's not surprising that may eventually give him the ick.

Also bear in mind, some injuries don't really show up until decades later when hormonal changes lead to prolapses and pelvic floor issues. Lots of women in their 50s and 60s have to go in for prolapse or bladder mesh surgeries. Some prolapses mean you have to stick your finger into your vagina and manually push the poo out every time you go to the loo. Does that sound appealing or fun to your own self esteem and body image?

And of course, you always get the lucky ones chirping they had a dream birth with no complications at all, which is great for them but doesn't mean anything in the bigger picture. It still means you have the baseline risk of everything going wrong or nothing going wrong. An ELCS comes with risks obviously but it's a medical procedure so those are controlled risks. Infection, pain, adhesions, scarring etc. Virtually no surgeries will generate side effects that last your entire life. I do know two women who had to have a followup surgery to correct adhesions but tbh that sounds more palatable than leaking wee and poo for the rest of your life.

@User765342a lof of these threads having women frothing in anger that the nhs dares to
pay for elective c sections. They had to suffer so why shouldn’t we. It often saves money with the amount of things that can go wrong with a vaginal birth.

Indeed, we are all different.

But I always feel I should share my experience because I had no end of warnings about the awfulness of C sections and none at all about how debilitating vaginal birth injuries can be, and how they can render you, in my case, incapable of looking after your baby properly for months.

You have to sign acres of consent forms for a C section, but not a soul warned me that a vaginal birth can severely bruise your bladder and stop it working properly. I was completely shocked and unprepared when it happened to me and I left hospital with a catheter and leg bag. What’s more, no one from the medical team was giving me any certainty that I wasn’t now incontinent for life (thankfully after a lot if physio it got better).

Also no one told me that if you “try” for a vaginal birth, you can’t easily opt for a section at any point if you get into difficulties. My daughter was too low down the birth canal at that point and pushing her back up for a section was risky for her and me. So episiotomy, failed ventouse, forceps, 3rd degree tear and PPH it was.

I had 3 NVDs. Third was home birth after hypnobirthjng classes and was definitely the best of all.
None required intervention, first was painful but I think it was mostly fear and being unprepared! Recovery afterwards was quick for all

Exactly this! The way many women will use cost and ethics as a way of guilting other mothers-to-be out of getting an ELCS is downright sinister. One person's ELCS doesn't take anything away from someone else, assuming the procedure is approved and all the resources allocated. There's also a lot of sneering at the idea a CS is the easy way out, which honestly, of course it fucking should be.

Modern medicine has advanced to a point where childbirth can be a 100% pain free, fast and safe procedure. In just 30mins, a baby is out, the mother is spared lifelong injuries or disfigurement and the risk of illness virtually nil. It's honestly an absolute miracle if you think about it and women have to be thick as shit not to jump at the opportunity.

The only thing holding everyone back is the collective idea that motherhood depends on some sort of suffering or active "birthing" process which is bullshit tbh. You only have one life and one body so what's the point in risking that all for some fuzzy notion of what noble motherhood should be. I think not enough women understand the true consequences of a natural birth gone wrong (or even mildly wrong).

That’s actually very true you get told absolutely zero about those kind of things . Which isn’t right either . I remember someone coming at me with a big long consent form
about the epidural , when I was in such pain I was in no position to be giving proper consent. It’s bizarre when you think of it .

C section every time. I had one natural with episiotomy which then had to be repaired 6 months later after months of pain . 3 C sections from which I recovered very quickly ,

Im also small and petite, however, I had the easiest natural births even though they were chunky babies!

You can have pelvic floor prolapse even though you birth by CS. The pressure of pregnancy can cause weakness. Elective CS seem to reduce incontinence at the 3 month/1 year but after that, there is no difference. Infact pelvic floor prolapses are becoming more prevelent in women with no children at all.

I really feel its the womans choice but CS isnt a controlled reduced risk option and women should be given the pro's and cons for both options. The evidence shows clearly that a CS increased blood loss at your risk of severe bleeding (Post partum haemorrhage). You are more likely to develop a blood clot, infecton and more complications such as placenta pravea/accretia in subsequent pregnancies. Additionally, babies born by CS are at increased risk of needing neonatal support and admission for breathing issues .

Im not saying this to scare anyone but you cant make an informed choice without all the information.

Ultimately, maternity staff will make decisons to reduce risks throughout your care.

People will always bring in their personal experience. Many hospitals run clinics that you can have these discussions with a senior professional - either a consultant midwife or obstetrician.