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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Panic! Panic! Panic!

19 replies

SallyInYorkshire · 07/02/2008 21:21

OK, this sounds mad but I'm due in 12 days and I kid you not I have ONLY JUST REALISED (like, 30 minutes ago) this means I will have a BABY sometime soon. I am so NOT READY (emotionally I mean). When did I ever think I was up to being a Proper Mum?

OMG OMG OMG... I am suddenly panicking!!!

Help, did/does anyone else feel like this or am I going insane????????? Please tell me this does not mean I am going to be a bad mother or get awful post natal depression due to not being prepared or stop myself going spontaneously into labour or something.......

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

filthymindedvixen · 07/02/2008 21:26

It's ok, you're not really going to have a baby. You've just got really bad wind.....

Hassled · 07/02/2008 21:27

I think it's better you're feeling like this with 12 days to go than do what I did and have the penny drop when I got home from hospital with DS1!
You'll be fine - it's big and scary and there would be something very wrong with you if you weren't having a bit of a moment . Good luck.

whomovedmychocolate · 07/02/2008 21:28

Nope, it's entirely normal to panic. You'd be weird if you didn't. Better to get it out the way now than when you are four centimetres dilated and trying to have a rational discussion about drugs with a mw!

speak2deb · 07/02/2008 21:28

First of all, congratulations!

Second of all, it's normal to panic, but I bet you'll be amazed at how much you enjoy your baby once it has arrived.

When I was pregnant, I was inundated by scare stories from people telling me how little sleep I'd get, how my boobs would get sore, how difficult everything would be, blah, blah.

What NO-ONE told me is just how much fun being a mum is and how I would fall totally and completely in love with my daughter. Just listen to your instincts, go with the flow, look after yourself and enjoy it.

You'll be brill.

filthymindedvixen · 07/02/2008 21:29

I know I felt like this and 10 years down the line, I still sometimes feel I'm making it all up as I go along....
You will be fine!

whomovedmychocolate · 07/02/2008 21:29

Oh and the birth is a doddle compared to the sheer relentless hard work of being a mummy too

BTW stopping yourself going into labour ha! You wait - in about ten days you will be willing yourself to have even one little contraction....you just wait. s

nappynoonoo · 07/02/2008 21:33

Sally dont fret you will be fine, really you will be. I was suprisingly calm about this all the way through my pregnancy. When I got home with DD I was like OMG what the hell do I do, what on earth was I thinking, how am I going to cope.

Basically how your feeling now I felt once we got home. The feeling goes, motherhood is wonderful and I am sure you will be an excellent mother.

Original poster

SallyInYorkshire · 07/02/2008 21:37

still laughing at filthymindedvixen's wind comment This could actually be true, since my 1st trimester I have been belching like a champion.... no stop!!! I am going back into denial again!!!

OP posts:

weeonion · 07/02/2008 21:41

sally - looking forward to reading your birth story and announcement in the near future! dd is 9mths and i remember being gripped with panic a whle before her birth in the "i am such a bluff - they will never let me take a baby home". that kinda lsated til we got her home, sat staring at her and weren't sure what we were "meant" to do.

no-one told me that despite the hard work I would be so in love with her. she has been the best entertainment and even though i have had some very dark days with PND - she has been the thing that has seen me through.

relax about it all. enjoy these last baby free days and look forward to a mini-in-yorkshire soon.

whomovedmychocolate · 07/02/2008 21:42

less a bun in the oven - more a yorkshire pudding then?

maxbear · 07/02/2008 21:43

I was serene and unpanicked during my first pregnancy (!) Had sudden realisation during first 24 hours of dd's life that she was here to stay and felt really scared. Felt like this for a few days then suddenly just stopped worrying.

vacaloca · 07/02/2008 21:46

I remember being shocked when a mw asked if I'd changed DD's nappy after she was born. It was the realisation that suddenly it was my responsibility to make decisions such as changing this baby's nappy. I don't think it'd sunk in until then that I was having a baby and she was all mine to look after.

whomovedmychocolate - sorry to hijack but I was doing a search for threads about doulas in Oxfordshire and saw you were looking for one too. Any luck yet? Or any recommendations?

Original poster

SallyInYorkshire · 07/02/2008 22:36

Thanks for all your replies - you are all so lovely and supportive.

Poor DH is having a stress-out of his own tonight as well (all about his work, which is v stressful) so it is really nice to be able to let off steam on MN without adding another burden to his shoulders!

OP posts:

Naetha · 08/02/2008 12:41

Sally - My DS is 5 weeks old, and although for the last few weeks the learning curve has been near vertical, (I've nearly learned to tough type with one hand!) I would (with slightly bated breath) say that it's all been pretty much a doddle, and nothing I couldn't cope with

Admittedly I've often searched frantically for posts on MN along the lines of "is my baby normal - he hasn't pooed for a week" etc, but all the info and reassurance has been there, and it's been great.

Incidentally, not sure where in Yorkshire you are, but I'm in Bingley, and would be happy to meet up for a coffee either before you give birth (I remember how bored I got!) or afterwards once you've got settled down (Have car so happy to travel a little!) Email me on elliethackray (at) googlemail (dot) com if you fancy it, although I understand if you don't - babies absolutely terrified me beforehand!

thequietone · 08/02/2008 12:45

Don't panic, you'll be fine. As someone near the top said, better now than afterwards. I've 17 days until I drop baby No.2 and I'm still in blissful denial over that one. TBH I'm still amazed the cute little DS running around was produced by me too!
Ignore the bad stories, take each day as it comes. I found that if you had a sleepless night feeding and wondered how you'd get through the next day, I ALWAYS did manage to get through it. It's just another day and it'll probably be a better one. Before you even realise it you'll be head over heels with your child and in total and utter awe.
Good luck!

NatalieJane · 08/02/2008 12:46

I don't think I ever had a moment of OMG I'm going to have a baby with DS1. It was only when we got home from the hospital he was still in his carseat asleep, DH and I sat on sofa, and I said to DH "So what do we do with him now" LOL Then it hit!

filthymindedvixen · 11/02/2008 20:03

how's it going Sally? Breathe deeply and re-laaaaax

Original poster

SallyInYorkshire · 12/02/2008 09:18

errrrrrr .... have kind of gone safely back into denial again .... however I have a New Plan, today I am going to sort through all the baby things we have bought and maybe that will help?????? (ie help to convince me both that I am going to have a baby and that I am prepared for it!)

all your kind comments have been very nice and reassuring too!

have also been talking to DH about it (now he has got over his work stress thing) and that has been helping lots.

OP posts:

beautifulgirls · 12/02/2008 09:29

I was crying my eyes out about 2 weeks before DD#1 arrived, wondering how in the world I was going to manage to be a mum. The reality is so different when the baby comes though and whilst you do not always feel like you are getting it right, you learn so much as you go along and you do cope - plus the love you get for your baby is so worth it all. What did really get me though was as we left the hospital the next day and the thought that they are letting me walk out of here with this precious little baby and trust that I am going to look after it properly. It just made me laugh in my head that they could be so stupid!!!

Blame it on hormones - you can right now.....
Everything else from here once the baby arrives you can blame on a growth spurt or teething!!!!

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