Dad to be dilemma

[1NuDad]

Hi there.

My partner is 32 weeks' pregnant and we are due on February 13th.

I have a quandary that I can't decide on.

I've just started a new job and they want me to go to Morocco for six days in early January. From the 7th - 13th.

My partner will be 35/36 weeks pregnant at this stage.

She, and her mother, both think I should just go on the trip, and is very relaxed about it.

I'm worried I would miss the birth of our first child, of course.

I could always get the first flight back home. It's a 3-hour flight. But obviously I could still be too late.

I estimate the probability of her having the baby while I'm away to be around 2%. Is that reasonable?

Is it crazy for me to even consider going?

If you've been given the nod by your partner then I don't see the issue.

There's no rules to having babies, she could go late.

Go. Early arrivals are very rarely entirely unexpected. She’d very likely be having some signs or symptoms to indicate things are moving giving you time to get home. If she and baby are in good health then there’s no reason to think baby will arrive so early. I’d be very relaxed about my partner going away at that time and I’m due the same time. Ask your boss to approve the expense of a flexible ticket.

It'll be fine, it's quite rare for a baby to come that early.

DD arrived very fast and totally unheralded at 38w and I'd say, go.

It is a new job which will support your baby. Don't annoy them now. I would have been quite sad if DH had missed DD birth. I'd have been beside myself if he hadn't passed probation and I was on mat leave.

I agree, babies rarely come spontaneously before 37 weeks. At least not without some kind of warning.

My own daughter needed to be induced at 37 + 5. But this was due to medical issues which had been identified 3 weeks earlier.

I say if all is well go for it, your baby could be born up to 6 weeks after your trip!

If you try to remember due dates represent the middle mark, as many people give birth before their due date as after, with greater percentages the closer to the due date. So I’d say you are pretty safe.

I would defer to your partner on this if it really is a critically important trip. Realistically, it's going to be so much easier to do this now before baby comes than after. I had my first at 37 weeks. Because of that I personally wouldn't be comfortable with it, but I also knew I would be early so I wouldn't have let my partner go anyway. I think if your partner is comfortable, then I would just do it and get it out of the way.

The only concern I would flag up would be one related to infectious diseases. I don't really know what sort of work you do or where you'll be, but I would think twice IF you were going to be in a setting where you might contract something to bring back that would affect your wife or baby. I would just speak to a travel health nurse about this to be extra sure. I don't know of anything specific in Morocco (I work in health research and have worked a lot in developing countries), but it's just something I'm always cautious of myself because I work in health care settings usually in pretty poor areas and the risk of infection is usually higher in these places. That's the only concern I would have if your partner is otherwise fine with it.