So scared about csection next week

[milkyman]

I have nade the mistake of reading horror stories on mn and google re csections. Had a terrible first birth - forceps, tearing, blood transfusion so thought csection best option (although aware of risks). I have a 3.5 yr old and dh will be off work for 6 weeks but still terrified. It wasnt a planned pregnancy so not sure how to cope - last time was awful at first and had pnd - i am a wreak without sleep. Life had just got back to a semblance if normality.

I've had 2 elective c sections. Both were lovely calm experiences.

I recovered well both times. I avoided stairs though to make sure my scar had time to heal. And no housework.

Mine was great, honestly. Really calm and laid back and the surgeon just pops the baby out and sews you up like they're making a sandwich or something. I would highly recommend it!

It's quick, all you have to do is lie there, then they give you your baby without any effort on your part. What's not to like?!

You might be a bit sore but they keep you dosed up on painkillers and it's not too bad. I was up and about moving slowly 24 hours later.

Good luck I hope it goes well. You might be surprised at how routine it all feels!

You sound more terrified of having a 2nd dc than the actual c-section...

I had one EMCS and one ELCS. The elective was lovely and i was out of hospital within 24 hours and pottering round out and about within a week. As a pp said it's a lovely calm experience.

You also have your DH with you for 6 weeks - that's really great so you can just concentrate on your new squidge. If you do start having any pnd feelings please pipe up straight away so your team can help you.

Good luck with it all xxx

Thank you all. Yes i probably am more terrified of second dc - but i know tjis time that they grow so quickly. I love being a mum.

I had an EMCS 2.5yrs ago and an ELCS 6 weeks ago. I recovered well from both, but unaurprisingly the ELCS was much less stressful! I'm a big advocate of sections, where necessary, and have been fortunate to never encounter anyone who's tried to tell me that I took the easy way out, or didn't give birth properly etc. I would have very little patience with anyone who did imply that.

Having two kids isn't really as hard as I thought it would be - it definitely takes more planning, but it's lovely to see them together and I'm so looking forward to them growing up together.

I have had two and there is nothing to fear. Just think your little baby will be here soon during theatre.

Keep topped up with painkillers afterwards and don't do too much and lie down to rest in bed rather than the sofa was one piece of advice I got.

I ended up with an EMCS with my first whilst my friend had an ELCS under the advice of her consultant. There was a world of difference between the two; it was planned which meant nice music in the theatre, time to bond with baby skin to skin, the father cut the cord, etc. As an added plus, she knew exactly what date the baby would arrive (useful for childcare with your first DC) and could put a recovery plan in place for the post op care, so the first few weeks were not such a shock. Congratulations on your soon to be DC2!

The cs isn't what's worrying you and rightly so. They're weird but absolutely fine. Calm, interesting and perfectly pleasant.

I had a traumatic first labour with a lot of intervention and an emcs. I had pnd and ptsd. I was so scared about dc2. I dreaded feeling so altered or having life reduce down to the peculiar fear and claustrophobia of those early days with a baby. I worried I was letting dc1 down or making a mistake.

It was nothing like that. I wasn't traumatised by labour or shellshocked from birth. I had perspective. I positively enjoyed the whole thing. I was mentally well and prepared to get help at the sniff of pnd.

6 weeks of DH being there is a great support. Do you have other family close by?

Having a second is NOT the shock of having a first and you'll be amazed at the physical difference of a calm elcs and recovery.

I recently had an emergency c section and I was amazed by how calm and lovely it was. The teams who carry it out are amazing. I recovered much better than I expected too.
Good luck with it all. You'll be great.

I've had emcs and elcs and have to say the elcs was a walk in the park.
I knew when I would be going to hospital so could arrange childcare, food etc.
The staff were great and I had a spinal anaesthetic so was awake when dd2 was born so could give her a kiss, dh got to come in to theatr and held her.....I had a crash section with first dd and was zonked out for 8hrs post op, dh not allowed in ( I had cord prolapse and dd1 nearly died)
Basically what I'm saying is an elcs is a controlled operation, much calmer procedure for everyone. I was up and about once my catheter was removed the very next morning
I then had a ds who was due to be born my elcs but he ahead other ideas and arrived 5 weeks early by 'vaginal delivery....but that's another story!

I've had one emergency and 3 planned .
Each time I'm amazed by how efficient and competent the surgeon his/her team are . I've been lucky to have a lovely surgeon each time with the planned .
It's natural to be scared / nervous before hand .
Just try to focus on the excitement of meeting your new baby .

Also, my first birth was terrible too but my second by planned section was so different I felt like it overwrote the first experience and I could 'put it to bed'.

I found a second a bit easier as I'd settled into the role of 'mum' a bit and felt more competent. Also, my 2 are currently cuddling on the sofa and the other day DD1 told me she loves her baby sister and she's her 'best buddy'! Two is nice, and I say that as someone who hasn't found parenting at all easy!