Just home with DD2 after quite possibly the best birth experience. That is not to say it didn't hurt, there weren't moments of excruciating pain and I didn't want it to be over as quickly as possible but it was so drastically different from the first time that it gave me faith in the whole process again.
DD1 was an induced, back to back, almost c-section but finally forceps delivery. Went on to have PND and hated motherhood for a couple of years as a result.
This time I had no expectations. I knew it was going to hurt. I threw out the hypnobirthing cd as it made me too relaxed and I concentrated on working with my body, my voice and my acceptance that I had a job to do. As a result I had an amazing water labour for 5 and a half hours with no other drugs and delivered sitting upright on the floor of the birthing suite. I got to lie with my baby and my partner with the cord attached until the placenta delivered naturally and the cord had stopped pulsing. I was able to feed baby and have her skin to skin all that time before eventually having a lovely bath, tea and toast.
I know I'm making it sound idyllic but I cannot believe how different the two experiences were and want to give hope to anyone who is worried or struggling. I was lucky in that I had the same fantastic midwife for the whole shift, an empty birth suite and the opportunity to use the pool but I think a different attitude went a long way too.
As for the NHS I cannot be grateful enough for what we have available to us. I am sure birth without it would be a very different experience.
Ok my hormones will be back to normal in a few days and I expect I'll be in tears by Friday about one thing or another but for now I just want to share some happiness and positivity with you all.
P.s My DD is adorable and I am made up with her.