Due tomrw and bricking it!!!!

[AmIGoingMad]

Ok I'm due tomrw with dc2 and am starting to have a bit of a meltdown.
I had a tough first birth- induction due to indication of pre eclampsia, GBS, failed epidural, fire alarm in hospital during pushing, third degree tear, passing out during stitches, post partum bleed and transfusion.

Generally am panicking at the thought of doing it all again!

Blood pressure behaving so far this time so far.

Please reassure me. Could do with some positive stories!

Anyone?

Repeat after me - each birth is different. My last experience will not shape this one. I can and will have a calm, peaceful birth.

I was induced with ds1 at 42 weeks who ended up in scbu. DS2 was a 3 and a half hour water birth at 38 odd weeks. Now 38 and a half weeks with dc3. Your body can give birth, you can have a calm empowering birth, you just have to keep reminding yourself of that.

Thank you so much dinky!

I keep trying to tell myself that but need to start really believing it.

It's good to hear positive stories like yours though as it make it seem more realistic.

Thank you.

If it helps, lots of my friends had difficult first births but smooth and happy second births. Your body knows what to do second time round - trust in it x

Thank you!

Exactly what dinkystinky said! My second was a breeze compared with my first good luck and enjoy that lovely baby x

Thank you shylepite!

I had hoped for some more positive stories! Maybe my thread title should have been 'please reassure me' rather than 'bricking it'!

I'm not due my second for another 6 months so can't really give a positive story. However, if you have any chance of getting your hands on a natal hypnotherapy course, get it.

I've read a lot of things about how our fear of our bodies not bring able to give birth have a lot to do with more difficult births due to stress hormones delaying things etc. If we are able to relax, focus and believe in ourselves it can be much easier. ( easier said than done of course!)

If you can't get it, see if your hospital has anyone you can chat to.

Even without the hypnotherapy, do listen to your body. If possible, move around and try different positions until you get as comfortable as possible. Try to imagine being home with your children, all out in the sunny garden blissfully enjoying each others company, or watching the baby sleeping in the cot etc. just to remind you labour will not last forever...

Ask your midwife for breathing techniques to slow crowning ( and reduce likehood/ severity of tearing) or ask for an episiotomy if you feel you need one.

Then come back in 6 months and remind me of this when ill be freaking out a bit!

AmIgoingMad - read some Ina May Gaskin stories (may be some on the web, otherwise borrow the books from the library) - there are some great first, and second, birth stories in there. You can also try hypnobirthing downloads (available online) to help calm you down and remind yourself you can trust in your body. Have you had a look on the birth announcements threads - I bet there will be some great second birth stories on there.

Thanks bluecarrot!

I think it might be a little late but I've been reading some sections of the hypnobirthing book. I totally agree with the theory of it, it's just getting it truly into my head that's the problem!

I tend to lie down and listen to the birthing affirmations/rainbow relaxation downloads - I invariably fall asleep to them but figure that's just showing how relaxed I am

Not first birth was An induction at term +12, it was fast but I started bleeding in labour really heavy (having 2 pads and a towel thing changed every 10 mins) he also pood inside me so had to be constantly monitored and laid down, the pushing was also quick, but once I had him the blood loss vamped up a lot I passed out also during stitches, when I come back round I was hooked upto everything in HDU with an erratic heart going at over 230bpm they said it was due to shock. Then I was re-admitted 4.5wk later with a big bleed again I had a womb infection and was put on 28 tabs a day, consisting of all sorts. It really scared me and i knew I wanted more kids but didn't dare try.

However I gave birth to ds2 2 and half year after, it was a spontaneous birth, no constant monitoring, it wasn't the easiest labour as he was back to back and it went on for 5 days, and the pushing stage was long, but I had no tearing, just grazing so needed no stitches and lost less then the blood loss was less then normal so that was great. I was like you absolutely petrified I actually cried when I realised that I was in labour.

But as said up above each and every birth is different :) I'm due with ds3 in 6 and half weeks I'm hoping this one will be nice and easy.

Good luck, you will do fine :) xx

My* and not, not. Stupid phone

Hello I had an amazing second birth after the horrible first one. Natal hypno was great although I only started listening to the CD a week before my due date. Would recommend finding some breathing exercises that you can practice to help you through the contractions. I felt so much more in control because of this.

Thanks for sharing your experiences! I really appreciate it!

my first dc was a cesarean and my second dc was absolute hell, i ended up delivering on my own as the mw went for lunch (well, not completely alone dp was running up and down the corridors looking for help but my mum held my hand!) ended up with awful tearing and then sewn back up filling every single stitch!! But, my third dc (which i counts as my second actually delivery) was a breeze! before they examined me they were ready to send me home as they didn't think i could be in labour because my contractions just made me go 'ooh' abit :) turned out i was 4cm, straight to delivery and on gas and air. spent the rest of it watching films until i was finally told i really had to push her out or they'd ventouse me (i was very scared of that bit due to previous experience) but it was fine, i had 2 midwifes telling me what to do this time! no cuts or tears, just a slight graze. like others have said, second deliveries tend to be an awful lot easier then first. my sisters second one shot out infact, they sent her dh home, sat her on a bouncy ball and gave her 2 paracetamols, half an hour later the baby arrived! i would recommend getting on the gas and air soon as you can, watch the monitor (if your on one) and beginning breathing in deeply when you can see a contraction beginning and keep breathing on it right through to the end of the contraction. it really worked wonders for me!

All points definitely being taken on board!

My tummy is in knots with nerves at the moment and I know that that's the worst way to be as it'll make my body fight against itself but I'm struggling to sort myself out. Have mw this morning and will speak to her about it to see if she can help at all.

You sharing your experiences is definitely helping though so thank you!

AmIGoingMad. Not sure if you have already had your baby but if not you can get the download of the Natal Hypnotherapy effective birth prapration cd and even listening to it a few times over the next couple of days can make a huge difference.