Is this in any way normal....?

[nearlymumofone]

Due to various problems I'm now having (that's another story), I am now reflecting upon dc1s birth and remembering something that happened. During the pushing stage the midwife had her fingers up my bum telling me to push into her fingers. I let this happen as at the time I just took it to be part of the craziness of childbirth. But now it seems more than a little wrong. Any ideas?

I've never had that happen and would be concerned about how she is then going to 'catch' with a very non-sterile glove on! I'd not be at all happy about this. Why didn't she just tell you to push into your bum if you needed some direction? Was this in the UK?

I've heard people tell me they hold your piles in. Did you have any? Could it be that?

I don't know if that's normal but at the least it would seem professional/polite of her to tell you she was going to do it and why, which I'm guessing would make you feel differently about it?

Are you absolutely sure that it was your bottom? It isn't uncommon for the midwife to push down on the posterior vaginal wall to help baby along if necessary. Because of our anatomy it is very likely that this feel like your bottom. I have never seen what you describe and would be horrified!

I've been thinking about this!

Giving birth felt to me and my friend like someone was putting pressure up our bums when they weren't.

Is there anything in your notes at all?

I'm going to request my notes. It was over 2 years ago now so my recollection isn't crystal clear. I remember thinking that she had what looked like an open wound on her hand and was not wearing gloves but noticed this at the end bit while I was literally about to give birth. I was unhappy about this after but coupled with the bliss of my new baby I forgot it. I am sure it was my bottom rather than anywhere else. I spoke to my husband and he can't remember anything about it- but he wasn't really down that end!

When I was pushing with DS1 my midwife put her fingers in my vagina and told me to push them out. I think she was trying to show me where to direct my efforts, so that I was using the right muscles to push with. I didn't have a problem with it, but I think she asked permission first and explained, and it was definitely not my bum.

It didn't help, anyway, and DS1 was ventouse delivery in the end.

It is quite common for the midwife to put two fingers into your vagina and sort of tug downwards (assuming you're on your back) then say to push them away. Given how close you were to delivery, I'm sure that what they were doing and the sensation was confusing. Everything is so close down there, for example, you can tell if a woman has a 'loaded rectum' when doing a normal vaginal examination.

Yes I found the sensation to be very much like someone was putting something UP my bum and there were no fingers at all.

That was pre pushing about 9cm.

hmmmm- now I'm wondering if she had them up my bum at all. Maybe it wasn't. Thanks for all your advice with this.

Why dont you get your notes and have a read through?

Im due another one any day so I`ll report back, I ended up with a forceps and epidural but I was at 9com and I knew it was coming towards the end as I got the bum-thing my friend told me about.

I checked about the piles as well and both said MW informed and used a wipe. Probably to save the poor women getting a ruined bum.

If you can establish she didnt do it at least thats an unpleasent memory you can get rid of isnt it?

True. Thanks for the advice. Good luck with this birth x