Homebirth panic

[binkybonk]

I live in a country where homebirth is not easily 'accessible'- local medical belief is induce, epidural and pull 'em out, intervention to the max.
Birth of DS was here two years ago in a hospital and was lovely really- quick, no intervention and no need for pain relief. Very lucky
So #2 due in 4 weeks and have been planning a homebirth all the way. Painful process but do-able- have to book a private midwife (has to be foreign as locally trained nurses are not 'midwives' just nurses who are on rotation in maternity dept. at that moment in time) and doctor (the only one in the country who'll attend, but I have to have to have one for the anything postnatal to be covered by insurance should I need it)
Anyhoo-
Now I'm panicking!!!! Basically had severe vomiting and diarrhoea the other night, felt the pain like the beginning of labour, (and was generally miserable and tired) and DH basically was completely ignoring me- 'busy' doing important 'stuff' (to be fair, started new job same day). Realised that amidst all of these shenanigans, I just really need him to be there and helpful! And he soooo wasn't the other day. Panicked me.
Maybe I should just go to hospital? At least the interfering nurses will be interested in helping me?!

That's a tricky one... I think if you have gone to lengths already to organise a HB you should stick to your plan. Was your DH on board originally and lost sight of your ambitions? Either way he needs a good talking to. You won't be alone but may have to build up strong relationship with private midwife and discuss your concerns with her ASAP. Good luck.

If things don't go smoothly, do you have access to ambulance/hospital? From two homebirth experiences (one involving a transfer to hospital and a delivery with forceps, one textbook natural delivery in 2 hours at home), I would be happy if (a) MW up to date with training (b) easy transfer to hospital available if necessary.

And get your DH on board. A new job is a new job - it'll be there next week. The birth of a child is a once-in-a-lifetime moment, to offer support and to savour the 'miracle' of a new life.

Thank you for your input. DH was reluctant when first mentioned and now you'd think it was his idea
We were talking last night and he was saying how he'd let the initial stress of a new job take over. I pointed out that new baby will trump it! Midwife and dr alone are actually great anyway and I have very good, supportive relationships with them both, should DH lose his way on the big day.
I'm 5 minutes from a big hospital (where DS was born) which is reassuring too.
Thanks for clearing my head

Cool, well update us. I'm hoping my HB2 is about to happen any day now (40+3 today). Went with private MW first time round but giving NHS a whirl as it was all pretty straight forward. Here's to another positive experience.

Exciting!! Good luck x

Was fab: DD was born at home this eve. Feel v blessed. Hope you have a brill experience. X

congrats, clickingtock

Wow Just seen this, fabulous news!!
Just met with my midwife this eve and feel v positive about it all
Thanks again for your help x

Good luck. It's worth all your extra efforts. You might be quick tho. My first HB was about 6 hours, tho midwife came about an hour before birth as I don't think she believed I was in established labour. This time the birth took around 3 hours then almost an hour for placenta. So don't labour on your own for too long. Anyway for your imminent arrival. X

Congratulations Clickingstock, hope all going well

Thanks all, am besotted with my DD, a week old tomorrow.