3rd degree tear - incontinence

[GracieLoo]

I don't know if this is the right place to post, but nearly 4 years ago I gave birth to my dd, was a back to back, ventouse delivery and I ended up with 3rd degree tear and was stitched up in surgery.

I took a while to recover, was horrendous, even typing this is hard as I feel it all happened to someone else. I had a follow up appt and all seemed well.

However, due to embarrassment or ignorance, I didn't tell anyone I had complete faecal incontinence at the hospital day after delivery. Since then, on the odd occasion it has happened, completely beyond my control. I get the urge to go and have no time, if u get what I mean! This doesn't happen a lot, and not just when I'm ill, but it just happened at home, and it leaves me a bit shaken and embaressed.

I don't know what to do, I don't think it's normal, is it due to the birth? And shall I tell GP? I'm scared it will never improve or even get worse. Sorry for detail, pls advise

You must go to the GP. I am guessing you will be referred to the hospital. You must not suffer with this anymore! i bet there are steps that can be taken to improve this for you. I wish you lots of luck and just remind yourself it is a medical problem just like any other and deserves treatment.

Tell your gp and they can refer you to a specialist. Don't be embarrassed, I know a few people who have had urinary or faecal incontinence after childbirth. They can do loads these days to help. Check out the embarrassing bodies website (for the channel 4? Programme). There have been a few people on there with the same thing. Hope you get some support!

Thank you, I just don't know if they'll dismiss it as it doesn't happen often, just occasionally, and I gave birth nearly four years ago. However, I think I tore quite badly so maybe there is still some damage. I don't know, bit scared!

Hi Grace, I work for a company that deals with continence issues & you're certainly not alone. It seems unfortunately fairly common for women to end up with either faecal or urinary incontinence after childbirth though of course this isn't widely publicised. The other posters are right that there's lots can be done to help or useful products available. Speak to your GP or have a search for continence support groups / nurse clinics in your area x

Gracie, I have the exact same problem! 3rd degree tear almost 4 years ago and my issue with faecal incontinence has got worse over those years. Like you I had to go for surgery after my DD's birth and the day after had an accident - although put it down to eating fruit and drinking smoothies as had heard the only way to get out of hospital was to have a bowel movement, and really wanted to go home! At the moment I manage it by not eating if I have to go out and downing 8 immodium.....it's not living this, it's miserable. I went to my doc back in the summer as had to get over the embarrassment as want to live again, she examined me and sent me to a colorectal surgeon who did a colonoscopy....i feel he's going down the wrong route as I know the problem lies with my anal sphincter, not my bowels, although admittedly they are loose but feel this is a catch 22 situation in that I'm stressed about having an accident so my tummy gets churned up = diarrhoea. Even when my stools are solid I have to go as soon as I get the urge, I literally have a 20 second window. I feel somewhat frustrated as it all takes so long, tests etc but please go to your doctor I'm gonna get to the bottom (ha ha) of this eventually as it's ruining my life. All I know is that 4 years ago I could retain wind and a bm, and now I can't. I wish I had the money to go private but I don't.
They tried fobbing me off with IBS but I know it's not that. Tried all the IBS medication and didn't work. Keep us posted, Gracie, I really do feel your pain.

Go to your gp. This can all be sorted out. My eldest daughter had a 4th degree tear 2 years ago and was looked after by a rectal surgeon and a physio. She is completely back to normal. Another daughter had a 3rd degree tear 5 months ago and again has been looked after by a rectal surgeon and a physio. She is also fine and back to normal. You must get this looked at.

Go to your gp. This can all be sorted out. My eldest daughter had a 4th degree tear 2 years ago and was looked after by a rectal surgeon and a physio. She is completely back to normal. Another daughter had a 3rd degree tear 5 months ago and again has been looked after by a rectal surgeon and a physio. She is also fine and back to normal. You must get this looked at.

There is a really good thread on the general health page, for all 'Raggedies'. I dont know how to link it but the ladies there are really nice and can offer virtual hand holding to let you know you are not alone.

Definitely see your GP, I have put up with 'down below pain' for about the last 3 months before getting the courage to finally seeing my GP yesterday (different to what you are going through but still just as embarrassing). I was referred immediately to the gynae consultant at my hospital and should be seen in the next week or so.

This is not normal and as it affects your day to day life then defintely should be taken seriously.

Grannylipstick, can I ask what treatment your daughters had to get them back to normal? Thank you.