Can someone tell me about private birth procedure?

[9DonkeysAndABoy]

Hi, I should be giving birth at the Kensington Wing in early September, consultant lead. They told me what happens when I come in, but as I have never been through it, can someone tell me what actually happens? How much is the consultant actually there? I HATE midwife lead care (I am not starting a discussion, just stating my feelings.) and as I am paying for a consultant, I am hoping he'd, if not be there all the time (I understand he would not be timing my contractions with me...) he would 'do' everything. I guess I am just paranoid because he palmed me off to a midwife for a check yesterday. He wasn't supposed to do that, but I thought I'd be easy going as he was obviously busy, and may have had an emergency somewhere. But then the midwife was SO brutal. Why midwifes are always brutal, and consultants can gain the same information using the gentle touch beats me, but as I am paying for it, I would be expecting to get it. Sorry, as you can see I was a bit traumatised by yesterday. I suppose I am angry that I did not stand up for myself and refused a midwife check.

So back to my question: can someone tell me first hand what happens when you come in for private, consultant lead birth? Anywhere really, but especially KW.

Thanks!

9DonkeysAndBoy I have had private care - following NHS experiences I might add! - (not Kensington though) and when I had a query I just phoned them. Did you get a booklet explaining everything and who to contact? I was not met by the consultant immediately but he did stick his head round the corner and introduce himself quite soon and was there at all the relevant points.

Like you, my issues were with midwives. I KNOW they are not all anti pain relief bullying sadistic harridans so may be the ones I met were uncharacteristic but with my NHS experiences I felt I was in a horror movie and they were getting some kick out seeing me in pain. I felt abused by them. DH's comment was that he was appalled at how cruel some women can be to other women. It is a shame really because there must be a lot of really kind hardworking ones, but until the profession takes a long hard look at itself, gets up to date and roots out the bad eggs, there will be a lot of women who feel like you and I.

Good luck anyway!

Hi Ushy, I guess we are of a same mind on these issues . Couldn't agree more with your feelings about midwives, and I really think something should be changed with the profession. But, as you say, some friends have had really nice, positive, gentle ones. So we can't paint them all with the same brush. BUT, I'd rather not play that lottery, having seen the chaff.

Anyway, yes, the consultant will be called straight away, and will be there throughout to make decisions and deliver the baby. BUT I will have a chat with him once more to make sure that this is indeed the case and that I absolutely do not want any midwives delivering my baby or preforming any procedures. After all I am paying a fortune. This probably would not have been an issue for me to think about at all had I not been kind yesterday and allowed an unscheduled midwife check. At least it reminded me that I don't like them!

I am also consultant led at the Kensington Wing. From what I understand, when you ring the wing to tell them you are in labour, they tell your consultant. I understand that the c

Woops..

Consultant will come in to check you periodically in the first stage but won't be there all the time - first stage could last a long time! - and during that time you are assisted by midwives. Consultant makes all the decisions. He is then involved 'full time' when you he to the pushing stage. He will perform all procedures I think (though assume midwives might do internal exams to check your progress?). I think it's a bit unrealistic to expectsuch highl trained pros (who do not work exclusively for the private wing) to be in attendance during the whole labour, even though we are paying for the privilege! Out of curiosity, whic consultant are you seeing? Also, the midwives I have seen on the KW have been a dream so far - so sorry you have had a bad experience! You can always ask for a different one if you are uncomfortable with someone assigned to you.

Hi citymonkey, yes, I did not expect him to be there during the first stage (I did write that in the OP), but I still hoped he'd be making decisions if any needed to be made at that stage, and I also would be hoping he'd be there for the pushing stage. If all goes well, I guess I should not be needing that much assistance during the first stage anyway. Good point about internal checks though, and bearing that in mind I may ask for a different midwife if I happen to get the same one. Out of the three that I have seen, you are right, 2 were great, only the third one wasn't, and like I said, she wasn't supposed to do this, and was surprised to be asked.

I am seeing Keith Duncan. You? I should add, he is a very gentle man. Hence the shock at brutality of midwives!

I think they are there for any decisions that have to be made (or contactable if eg they are seeing other more urgent cases in the hosp at the time / not on duty)

Also seeing Keith Duncan! He is away on hols from the bank holiday weekend to the following weekend though so am being covered by Roger Marwood I think for that time (meeting him this week or next week) - I am due mid Sept.

Oh, right, sorry, I just saw your other post. Exactly the same as me, then! Similar due date and same cover. I don't know Roger Marwood, but I think I've read good things about him. How did you decide for Keith Duncan?

He does all of his own scans, is the director of obstetrics at C&W and seemed to have very good reports on various forums. Pleased so far, though obviously would much rather he wasn't away for my weeks 37-38!!

Yes, I know what you mean. It'll be my week 38. He is only away for one week though, right?

I chose him for same reasons, but I think he was a little bit surprised - I think most of his clients come through personal recommendations. Which is good I guess.

Yeh - one week but both weekends I think.

As it turns out some friends of ours we hadn't seen for ages also used (and speak highly) of him, but we had already booked in when we found that out. The wife of my boss at work used Guy Thorpe-Beeston but I wanted the same person doing scans etc if poss so went with KD.

That's good to know. Yes - I value the scans highly too. It proved useful with the fibroid too. Have you got a birth plan (that is more intelligent than my basic 'try natural, go for epidural if I cannot stand it)?

I will message you :-)