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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Second time round - is it better?

40 replies

ScarlettButler · 05/12/2010 21:05

Reassure me ladies....last time I ended up with a spinal, ventouse, forceps and an episiotomy...
Have moved and I'm due to give birth at St George's, Tooting, this tiem round and was impressed by the Carmen Suite and the tour. But am increasingly nervous
a) after all the bad reports I've read here about St G's and
b) whether I'd be able to stomach a birth with G&A and possibly pethedine (got to 10cm last time on nothing - not cos I'm tough but by mistake, was too scared to go into hospital until last min after being sent home once - but then it all slowed down, had a grumpy midwife who I found very difficult to deal with and DC got stuck... and I can't say I look back with fondness)
Any words of reassurance to cheer me up?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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BarbieLovesKen · 05/12/2010 21:15

Ooh I swear second time round is sooooo much easier!!!. I didnt actually believe people when they said this until I had dc2. Everything is better, the birth and the recovery after.

I didnt have the nicest time with dd1, I found the birth difficult but was completely shocked and in a lot of pain (and depressed) for well.. months later. With DS, I honestly bounced back within a few days, I felt like I was waiting for the pain/ difficulty to start and it just didnt...

I didnt have any pain relief whatsoever with ds, and was on syntocin drip to speed things along (as he passed meconium in the waters) which does make labour more painful etc and still it was easier.

I was really, really terrified about ds's birth. Im pregnant with dc3 now and not the slightest bit nervous.

Original poster

ScarlettButler · 05/12/2010 21:35

BarbieLovesKen - ooh JUST the sort of message I was hoping to get back

I just didn't have a great experience first time round (mainly due to grumpy midwife I have to say) so I'm glad to hear that you had a much better time...

OP posts:

TheBreastmilksOnMe · 05/12/2010 21:38

I'm currently 32 weeks with baby no2 and would like similar reassurances as my 1st labour was pretty hard going ending up in an EMCS. Do you mind if I sit with you ScarlettButler?

Original poster

ScarlettButler · 05/12/2010 21:43

Not at all TheBreastmilksOnMe - would be delighted to (passes over raspberry leaf tea)

OP posts:

LOLA1545 · 06/12/2010 00:15

I don't know if it's any better, you just know what to expect! I was 3 days in labour with my first and no pain relief (wouldn't give me a epidural as his heart rate kept slowing down)I went into shock and was sick and to be honest wasn't that interested in my son as all I wanted to do was sleep! My 2nd was born an hour after I got to hosp (again, no pain relief as she was so quick) The pain was horrendous and was all dramatic about how I couldn't do it,.lol but I was showered, dressed and ready to go home 3 hrs after I had her, so yes, better the next time around, but only cos u know what's going to happen!

I would say, both labours they wanted to perform a episiotomy with forceps(!) even though I didn't have an epidural. I managed to push them out and didn't get a tear, I dread to think what state the they would have left me in had I let me, trust ur instincts and remember the doctors aren't always right!

FooffysFestiveShmooffery · 06/12/2010 00:19

I had the labour from hell on DS but second time round, still painful, just more normal. A few hours of extreme pain some heaving and out she popped just how it should be.

thesecondcoming · 06/12/2010 00:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LOLA1545 · 06/12/2010 00:24

Funnily enough, I've heard of a couple of people who have said the 3rd was the worst!!

thesecondcoming · 06/12/2010 00:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

ScarlettButler · 06/12/2010 07:52

ah so the trick is to stop at two thesecondcoming

OP posts:

clumsymumsnowdriftbaby · 06/12/2010 10:27

2nd was def easier,start to finish in an hr...theres a thread about it somewhere.
it was a bit of a shock afterward beacause it was so fast,but the actual labour was really fine.
i was alot better prepared for it ,i had read an ina may book (fabby btw,do read one if you have time!) but i think the main thing was i knew what to expect.
my first labour was 12hrs of pure pain and panic,followed by 30 mins of fuzzy (gas and air) pushing.

second was,wake up,intense contraction,mad dash to mw unit,gas and air (my old friend) push,baby.

good luck

mousymouse · 06/12/2010 10:31

yes, easier and quicker.

first time: induced after waters broke without labour starting, ended in ventouse

second time: waters broke again, but labour started on its own soon after and 5 hours later baby was born. only gas and air. but not less painfull than first time, just quicker.

thesecondcoming · 06/12/2010 12:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Poppet45 · 06/12/2010 13:21

Beautiful last post there secondcoming. Milkcoma awwww!

I think if I ever have another and don't end up in a high dependency unit after the birth I'll be pleased.

onepieceoflollipop · 06/12/2010 13:27

I had a much better experience with dd2.

dd1 was very large (almost 10lb) and was born by induction following a terrible pregnancy plagued by hyperemesis. It took 27 hours from induction to birth, and I had gas and air, pethidine, epidural, prepped for emergency c-s but eventually they tugged her out via ventouse. All food and drink was witheld from me from the start, except the odd sip of water and I vomited 7 times.

Took me almost 4 years to have another. dd2 was 2 days "late". Labour started spontaneously at home. I had the most wonderful and kind midwife (Marie, if you are out there I really love you. :))

I paced about and howled during early labour which hurt but was manageable. I had gas and air for the last hour or so. The actual delivery hurt but not overwhelmingly so. Baby was just over 8lb. I was on top of the world from the sheer adrenaline and the gas and air. One of the best days of my life.

For me the second birth experience was powerful and intense (in a good way)

mum2oneloudbaby · 06/12/2010 18:32

2nd is way better.

dd (1st) 3 days of painful stop start labour, syntocin drip, 3rd degree tear, ages to recover very painful. It was at least 3 months before I felt anywhere nearing normal.

ds contractions started breakfast on and off all day ramped up at tea time born at 9.34pm in water, only g&a, kept falling asleep all day between contractions (couldn't stay awake) so slept most of the labour. At home in the bath and in the pool at the hospital dh kept waking me up so I didn't drown! 2nd degree tear but not at all painful in recovery and actually feel really good at 4 weeks post-partum. Doddle, but a bit disappointed that I will never get g&a again

notacluebutlearning · 06/12/2010 18:41

Much quicker 2nd time round which means less painful too. I had DS2 at St Georges (after a lovely birthing experience overseas with DS1) in the Carmen Suite. I had absolutely zero problems with St Georges during my labour and afterwards on the ward.

The added bonus with the Carmen Suite is that it has a separate post-natal ward so don't have to go on the very busy and loud Gwillam Ward.

The midwife was great and stayed with me for the whole labour from when I arrived (DS2 arrived 50 mins after arrival!!!) Don't hang about at home with the second!

Good luck and hope you have a nice experience at St Georges - I don't have any negative comments!!

homelyperson · 07/12/2010 16:47

Much better experience with DC2 here, too. Although the whole thing took from 3am till 12pm, the contractions I had at home 3am-9am weren't too painful and only the last couple of hours really hurt. But I knew what was doing and it took much quicker anyway. Recovery was amazingly better, too. So happy I had my DC2 otherwise would think of giving birth as a big horror!

soniaweir · 08/12/2010 12:06

Second time was quicker for me but more painful but shorter! ended up with another emcs but st georges were MUCH better this time and actually had a nice time there. Postnatal care was much better, not amazing but they seemed to care a bit better than last. good luck - remember it will soon be over and the memory of the pain will hopefully fade quickly!

clairemgill · 08/12/2010 16:57

I'm 33 weeks and a bit nervous too so its good to read some positive messages about this. My main concern is that this time I know what I'm letting myself in for - does it all come flooding back? Also, I had an episiotomy last time and I'm worried about my scar tearing - can that happen??

mum2oneloudbaby · 09/12/2010 13:16

I didn't find it all came flooding back until ds was crowning and then it was positive because I remembered what my first mw said about taking it slowly.

I was also worried about my scar tearing (had 3rd degree tear with dd and seriously considered a cs) I did tear 2nd degree this time but not in the same place and recovery was much quicker and less painful.

Tootingbec · 09/12/2010 21:07

Helloooo I had both mine in St Georges. DC1 was the full caboodle - 36 hours labour ending up with ventouse, episiotomy, drips, catheter etc etc.

2nd DC (8 weeks old now) also at St Georges - 3 hours from first twinge to finish and completely different experience. Was in the Carmen Suite (fab - and postnatel much better than Gwilim ward) and it was just me and the midwife. Very fast, very intense and hurt like a motherfucker but the recovery after was SO much better compared to having an epidural and episiotomy (not that I didn't LOVE my epidural the first time round - no time second time!).

chitchatinsantasear · 10/12/2010 15:23

My first was bloody awful - but because it was 'child related' the MWs assured me that there was no reason for the 2nd to be difficult. But for different reasons my 2nd was awful too - made worse because of the assumption that the 2nd would be easier so the MWs wouldn't listen to me.

spiggy · 10/12/2010 23:02

Sooooo much better. DS 3 days of contractions, bleeding, syntocin drip, waters broken, all drugs under the sun, ventouse, infected stitches long recovery time.

DD- Few contractions but nothing major (15mins apart). Finished my dinner, thought I'd get in the bath to see if things sped up. Waters broke, 15mins later holding baby. No stitches. Stayed at home. Felt amazing and up and about the next day as if I hadn't given birth. Only downside was the paramedic insisting that I wasn't about to deliver until I pointed out that her head was out

I am sticking my head in the sand and ignoring any comments about the 3rd being the worst (due in May )

TCOB · 10/12/2010 23:07

1st - 22 hours, stuck, epidural, ventouse: HELL.

2nd: 5 hours, gas and air, homebirth - all traumas put to bed.

Took me nearly 7 years to have DD as was so upset by DS's birth but now I can help spread the good (though slightly unscientific!) news that 2nd time is easier.

And both were back-to-back.

GOOD LUCK to Scarlett and Breastmilk (and to secondcoming's little milk coma'd chubber - cute!)

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