Year 3 friendships

[carmen66]

Hi, my DD is 8 & in an independant school.. I'm so worried about her as she's finding it hard to socialise with other kids especially girls.. There was one particular child that she's known since nursery & although they did tend to bicker they played together. I find that sometimes two of the same personality tend to clash. Anyway since year 3 this friend has befriended another girl & my DD feels pushed out so I advised to her to make a wider circle of friends but she's finding it really difficult I think she feels very intimated by other girls..
Her original friend now won't speak to her & is being very spiteful I told my DD to be nice to her & it's causing a lot of friction.. My Dd came on Friday & said she hates school & has no friends she gets on better with boys but their getting older & sometimes don't want girls around... My Dd comes out of school virtually every day frustrated & with a long face she seems to be angry all the time apart from weekends when she's at home.
I'm trying to organise some play dates but she might play with another girls at home but not in school.
I'm feeling so sorry for her maybe it's all part of growing up I really don't know what to do next .. Any advice greatly appreciated :
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Oh, how I relate to this! It is a funny year/age as there are lots of friendship shifts. At least you are aware of it, so she is not alone. It can be really hard but I am sure it will get better for her. I have been through exactly the same and the only advice I can give is not to worry too much - just do lots of out of school activities so that she can meet new kids.

Try giving her some knowkedge /tools to deal with friendships. How to recognise crap friends. How to make sensible come-backs to nasty comments. How to believe that she is worth more than "being nice" to nastiness in the hope it will stop.How to accept some friendships just naturally end.

I was told by my parents to ignore it/be nice. Made fyck all difference.
I got this www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/1584857110. Read it. Gave to DD (yr3) and role played some answers. We called it her tool-box. Has helped hugely. She is still loyal, caring, friendly..but recognises if/when others are consistently mean or unpleasant to just not bother with them iyswim. I sooo wish I had had some of this earlier in my life.

Hope it helps. Good luck. And . I know it it's pants to see them unhappy.

My dd is just coming to the end of yr 3 and it has been a turbulent year for friendships, she started off the year with a best friend and they have fallen out and made up more times than I can remember.

It got to the point were like your dd she was coming home upset and frustrated and the girls were not really being nice to each other anymore.

It was hard but dd realised that her friend wasn't really a friend anymore.

It has now settled down and she has a new friend but still struggles tbh, she came home today and said that her new friend was ill so she had no one to play with at lunchtime.

I think friendship dramas are typical for this age and am hoping next year things will be a bit better!!