when does 'hitting' and 'pushing' turn into bullying?

[eyeofhorus]

DS is in reception. A boy has been hitting and pushing him and some other children. Just wondering how/ when this changes into bullying bearing in mind they are only 4/5. Also concerned that the school has not kept me informed but when I spoke to the TA she said she knew of the "situation".

It's not bullying unless it's repeated, deliberate targetting. In my experience (teach reception) as children are essentially egocentric until around the age of 7, it is more likely to be a case of rough play and communication struggles. For example, child 1 has the scooter, child 2 wants it. Child 2 grabs scooter, child 1 grabs it back. Child 1 pushes child 2. Child 2 pushes child 1. Those children who can ask politely etc are no less likely to push or grab because although they know how to ask they often don't like the answer!

The TA probably meant it in a well meaning way to assure you that the child who is a bit hands on shall we say will be being watched. If your son had been injured (I assume) you would have been told. If I rang every parent whose child was pushed I would be on the phone all day.

"Mrs X ds was pushed. No he's fine"

"Mrs Y ds pushed someone."

"Mrs X sorry to phone you again but ds has hit someone"

thanks for that weedle. god to have some advice from someone in the know!

good even!

No problem

Hope he's had a good day today! If it does seem to be dragging on, obviously talk to his class teacher about it. But I'd imagine they are already putting strategies in place for the other child