Help - tired with crick neck! Breastfeeding 3 w old to sleep who then only sleeps on me

[PollyParanoia]

Hello, this is my third so I really feel like I should be a dab hand at this childcare business, but...
My dd will only sleep on me at night. Procedure is
a) feed her and put her in crib or safely on bed
b) she cries so I pick her up
c) end up feeding her some more
d) let her go to sleep on me
e) move her back in crib/bed
f) cries again so repeat c) and d) but give up on transferring her.
g) I sleep sitting vertically propped up on pillows with baby prone across my caesarean scar.
I've tried rocking her to sleep and then transferring her, but she always wakes up within minutes if she's not on me. I know I shouldn't probably give in but I need to get some sleep to be able to function the next day and look after older two.
Obviously she's too young to do any controlled crying and I'm rubbish at that anyway, but what's the best and quickest way to get out of this habit? Preferably one that doesn't involve staying up all night to achieve?
Sorry if this is the wrong place to be posting. I think there should be a mn section on sleep issues. Maybe there is, but I'm too sleep deprived to find it.
thanks for any help
Pol

Have you tried swaddling her? My ds loved to be swaddled because it gave him a sense of security and warmth. Might be worth trying! Sounds like a lovely (cuddly) problem, but exhausting too!

If you are breastfeeding, have you tried feeding laying down on your side with her on her side facing you? Then, she will probably fall asleep on your breast but you can also sleep like that.

I am also on my third (who is now 4 weeks old) and doing this. It is the only way to stay sane!

I caved in after 3 weeks of sleeping like this and gave my dd a dummy. She slept blissfully then, sucking away like mad.

swaddling has helped me with my 3 week old. I swaddle her whilst she nodding off on boob than put her down!!
Good luck.

Hi, Polly, I am also on No3 who is currently crying in his cot as I am desperate to improve his sleeping before my return to work next weeks .

Try all of the above. I found in the past the suggestions in the "No cry sleep solution" by Elisabeth Pantley helpful, but this time I am trying the "tough love" approach of "Healthy sleep habits, happy child" by Dr Marc Weissbluth as nothing so far has worked .

How old is your DD?

Hi - sympathies, it's so hard

I mainly co-slept for the first 6 weeks as my DS was the same, and it was easier just to let him go to sleep beside me after feeding (as IlanaK describes).

From 6 weeks I've been doing 'pick up/put down', which is basically that once you've fed, put baby down in basket, then each time he cries, pick him up to settle him then put him back down. This can obviously continue for a good while before he settles, and is quite exhausting! My DS has slept in his basket each night for a week now. Sometimes he goes straight to sleep and sometimes we have a few pick ups/put downs before he settles, but overall so much improvement

Hi Polly,

DS had similar habits. I had some joy with swaddling, but big turnaround was when we bought a sheepskin underlay for his cot (made it much softer whilst still safe) and raised the head end of the cot on those stacking blocks you can get for the job from Blooming Marvellous.

Good luck,
TIAIC

Good ideas upthread (particuarly the learn-to-feed-lying-down one!).

How about one of those neck pillows (a super deluxe one which is actually comfy) like people use on long haul flights? Not a long term solution, but a short term coping strategy for sitting up and sleeping.

ooo so many good suggestions.
I was given one of those miracle blankets for swaddling which I do, but I let her arms be free as she sticks her fingers in her mouth. I think I might try to swaddle her more tightly - at the moment it's a bit half hearted.
Meanwhile will also do the feed by my side.
I also think she might prefer being on her side to on her back so might try to wedge her safely like that. Stacking blocks might also do the trick.
I think also I want reassurance that if I let her sleep on me for a few weeks (and it is nice as well as aggravating as she's definitely my last and it all goes so quickly) then it won't be for ever and she'll move into a cot seemlessly at some point. She came out two weeks earlier than my other two so in some ways may be less formed.
thanks again for all these thoughts
Pol