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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

comfort sucking - any tips before I resort to the dummy?

31 replies

isaidno · 11/07/2008 14:54

DD is just over 3 weeks old.
She is starting to comfort suck - ie breastfeed, then cry and come off when the milk comes through because she is not hungry. My 2 DS did this, although they would just puke the unwanted milk back up. I ended up giving them both a dummy.

I bought a dummy today, although I don't really want to start it.

Just wondered if anyone has any other suggestion.

OP posts:
PrettyCandles · 11/07/2008 14:56

Let-down too strong for her maybe?

Jojay · 11/07/2008 14:57

Why don't you want her to have the dummy?

Original poster
isaidno · 11/07/2008 15:01

PC - the let down is fine when she is hungry.
jojay - I guess it is just dummy snobbery really; I don't like to see babies with dummies (or worse toddlers). I realise it might be the best option and save alot of grief on all sides.

OP posts:
Jojay · 11/07/2008 15:05

I'm a dummy snob too, but it was a great comfort to DS when he was little. He gave it up on his own accord at 11 momths so we never had any battles with it, and it was only ever a help, not a hindrance.

I'm pg with #2 now, and I'm happy to use one until it's 1 - then I'll be taking it away as I too hate seeing toddlers with them. I think the older they are, the more they resist giving it up too.

LadyThompson · 11/07/2008 15:12

3 weeks and you are resisting a dummy??? Poor little mite. For pete's sake: it's a dummy, not crack.

Teuch · 11/07/2008 15:14

some babies just have an overwhelming urge to suck and, if you resist the dummy, they will find something else to suck on sooner or later.

At least with a dummy, as opposed to thumbs/fingers/toys/blankets, you can take it away when you feel it it no longer needed.

Original poster
isaidno · 11/07/2008 15:15

lol LadyThompson!

OP posts:
LadyThompson · 11/07/2008 15:15

That actually sounder harsher than I'd intended but I think when they are really little like that it doesn't matter.

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 15:19

I dont like dummies. Especially when i'm at baby groups and the babies are just constantly sucking on them. Any hint of a noise dummy in! ds used to comfort suck sometimes in early days. Stopped at around 5 weeks, i think he still sometimes does it now. still i'd prefer to indulge him every now and then to have him winge for a dummy. I guess they do have their place, but not in my house!

Such a dummy snob! Don't care who knows it

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 15:19

I dont like dummies. Especially when i'm at baby groups and the babies are just constantly sucking on them. Any hint of a noise dummy in! ds used to comfort suck sometimes in early days. Stopped at around 5 weeks, i think he still sometimes does it now. still i'd prefer to indulge him every now and then to have him winge for a dummy. I guess they do have their place, but not in my house!

Such a dummy snob! Don't care who knows it

LadyThompson · 11/07/2008 15:23

Militant dummy snobbery is unnecessarily uptight, imo...

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 15:33

Well i think the number of babies that leave hospital with a dummy in their mouth is ridiculous.

That babies are now gagged with a dummy and not allowed to gurgle.

People in undeveloped countries seem to cope just fine with out them. Waste of money i think, plus it's gross when mum's put them in their mouths (full of adult bacteria) to 'clean' them.

LadyThompson · 11/07/2008 15:37

Not sure about the 'people in undeveloped countries' argument (bit reductive, that) but agree that they shouldn't be used as a plug, 23 hrs a day, and that they should not be put in adults' mouths 'to clean'. I just think there are worse things than a dummy, and sensible use of one really ain't so bad.

TinkerBellesMum · 11/07/2008 15:47

Dummies can affect the duration of the nursing relationship.

I prefer the word nursing to BFing because it takes away the emphasis from the "feeding" part. Babies don't just nurse for food, they do it for comfort, to encourage your supply and to put orders in for the next feed.

When you look properly into dummies and nursing, you find out there is a lot more to it than just snobbery.

I must admit I was a snob about it before I had Tink, but the hospital wouldn't allow any artificial teat to be given to a BFed baby, between their reasons, seeing a term baby in the unit with a dummy who was more upset and needed more care than the sick babies because she kept losing it, looking into it myself and doing a peer support course my reasons now are more than snobbery.

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 15:56

All i'm saying is that they are not necessary (lots of people manage just fine without them). People buy them before their babies are born presuming that they will need a dummy. Babies don't need dummies parents use them for convenience. Well that's what i think about allot of the mums that i have come across that use dummies.

Sure ds winges sometimes but i comfort him (cuddle/rock/sing/distract him) not stick a dummy in his mouth. I adress the problem. I just think dummies often mask the real reason the baby is winging, hunger, tiredness, boredom, fear...etc.

I'm not saying you are a bad parent for using one. They just annoy me. Sure their are allot of things that annoy you Lady!

Dummies, mums feeding their babies crap and smoking over pushchairs just get on my... nerves.

LadyThompson · 11/07/2008 16:01

Well...each to their own. I just think that used in moderation, they're not the world's biggest evil. FWIW, I do think mothers feeding their babies crap and smoking over pushchairs are completely beyond the pale

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 16:11

No not the ulimate evil, that would be a fruitshoot!

to the OP. I think that you should refrain if possible, allow your dd to comfort suck, she is only little. I'm sure it will calm down over the next few weeks. I think allot of comfort sucking is due to the closeness and safety a newborn baby craves. That yummy smell of milk and skin to skin from the breast.

Maybe thinking of it that way will hopefully make it less tiresome. God knows i know what it feels like to have a baby clamped to your breast nearly all day. You are nurturing your little one, thats what mums are for!

Original poster
isaidno · 11/07/2008 16:38

LittleMissBliss - I don't mind the comfort sucking exactly, but it is not giving her much comfort because as soon as the milk comes she screams because that's not want she wants. Then she will try again and settle for a few minutes when sucking before choking and spitting out more unwanted milk. This seems to frustrate her.

I think I will try to hold out a little longer - and I will also try to refrain from lighting up my fag while I open up the fruitshoots...

OP posts:
TinkerBellesMum · 11/07/2008 16:59

isaidno, she needs to do it to build up your supply and eventually she will learn how to control it better. Give her some time and it will settle down. Try swapping her over occasionally to stop her getting choked in the mean time.

Teuch · 11/07/2008 17:07

FGS! The OP asked about using the dummy to address a specific and identified problem.

She didn't say 'my baby is whingy and I need a convenient but effective way of, well, shutting her up 23 hours of the day'.

I would say try it - it may not even be the solution you are looking for, but it is not 'evil'!!

bearmama · 11/07/2008 17:16

I have finally given DD a dummy at 3 months because she was trying to stuff her whole fist in her mouth and sucking on it. But obv she is older. For now I agree with TinkerbellesMum - she will learn. Enjoy!

LittleMissBliss · 11/07/2008 17:50

I'm sure my argument would be much stronger if i used correct grammer and spelling, there not their. and address etc. sigh...

Teuch- no not evil, but no means necessary!

isaidno- Good luck, remember your milk hasn't settled yet 1-2 weeks yet. Hopefully the gushing will stop soon!

CJMommy · 11/07/2008 18:00

I thought the use of dummies had been identified in reducing the risk of cot death??? Gave DS a dummy at about 6 weeks and it didn't interfere with our nursing

TinkerBellesMum · 11/07/2008 18:14

It's a whole complicated thing with the link between SIDS and dummies, but the short answer is no.

Basically babies that use dummies are at higher risk of SIDS if the dummy is not in all night. But because it's a study sponsored by MAM the results have been spun so that it looks in favour of dummies.

It may not have affected you, but research does show that babies who use them wean from the breast sooner than babies who don't.

Original poster
isaidno · 11/07/2008 21:27

Well, I tried the dummy this evening and DD was absolutely not interested in it. So now I feel better because I have not denied her the opportunity!

OP posts:
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