Advice around stopping breastfeeding after 1 year

[Vicky98]

I could really do with some advice on
Stopping breastfeeding please 🙏

So I’ve been breastfeeding for just over 1 year now, didn’t think ide get this far but as time went on and it became the normal part of daily life I decided I wanted to keep going for more nearer the 2 year mark. My baby eats a great amount of normal food , still feeds a lot during the day, sometimes proper feeds, sometimes stops after a few seconds so I’m guessing wanted abit of comfort.
She feeds to sleep for daytime naps in my arms and often I place her onto bed asleep and she’ll sleep alone in the day. Bedtime she’ll feed and very often lay herself onto the bed awake and settle herself. But then will wake up multiple times in the night sometimes a cuddle ect gets her back to sleep , a couple/ few times a night she’ll properly feed and drink alot, but also occasions a few occasions just wants boob for comfort to resettle with and will fuss until she gets it.

I’m having alot of thoughts about stopping, sometimes im not bothered by it and enjoy the bonding and the cuddles and closeness it creates. I’m under a lot of stress at the moment, dealing with a lot and have also been put onto sertraline, which I was hesitant about because of breastfeeding worries and although have been reassured how safe it is it plays in my mind. But mainly I often feel so stressed that breastfeeding makes me want to pull my hair out and that I want space. It’s strange because the good times are amazing but the bad times feel like they will never end. I want to keep going but I understand it’s all
Or nothing and I can’t just pick and choose when to feed depending on my stress levels.

So I’m unsure if it’s even the right time to stop because is that going To cause me more stress , what approaches have people found work the best around stopping night boob comfort/ feeds in general. Where do I start daytime or nighttime. Should I power through and wait untill I’m in a better place. Will the hormonal shift that comes with stopping cause me more issues right now? Has anyone ever transitioned from boob feeding to expressing, this crossed my mind as a middle ground, I could then get my body back and not be latched onto but also can continue giving baby the nutrients i want to not sure if this is a realistic approach?

I’m Really stuck , I wish I could just stop and have it over with but I also wish I had the patience to keep going 😥 breaks my heart to think about stopping but also I don’t want to continue and start having a negative attitude towards it as that’s not fair on baby either , any advice would be greatly appreciated please 🙏

Expressing is not the answer- it is much more stressful and time consuming and your LO will get much less benefit, and so will you - you are getting an oxytocin boost even if it feels like a chore right now.

I think your main issue is the disrupted sleep. I really get this because my two have been extremely bad sleepers - hence why I'm up now!. Two classic tips to try are, fill them up with as much food and BM before bedtime as they can manage, to lengthen the time before they're hungry. Second one, warm pyjamas and cold room. Often they're waking you up to get you to sort their temperature (via your own body being in contact).

Edit to add - i BF mine for 2.5y each, and both times I stopped i experienced a significant mood dip each time thst lasted a couple of months. It's something that's best done when your mood is on an even keel imo

I don’t think expressing is the answer either.

I’d start with some gentle night weaning as if you reduce feeds during the day, she might start to want to take more feeds during the night.

I too suffered a dip in mood once I’d stopped completely BFing.