BF journey come to an end? :(

[Sunshine567]

My lo has breastfed since birth despite me trying to wean her early on to bottles as I hated the whole breastfeeding situation. But she just wasn’t interested. Fast forward almost 2 years later and she was still feeding first thing in morning when she woke up but since I went back to work in the past 2 weeks I am generally not about for her waking unless she’s had a bad night. She now hasn’t fed in over a week and I am beyond sad! I never thought I’d feel like this but I do. I feel awful because I feel like I’ve forced her to stop rather than it just come to a natural conclusion on her part. Am I being ridiculous?

To me? Yes, it sounds ridiculous, sorry, but then I went back to work at 10 months and stopped breastfeeding then and I felt quite pleased it was over! Sorry.

No you most definitely are not being ridiculous! For a start, your hormone levels will have realised the change and cause you to feel really emotional about it. Plus it's one of those end of an era things, like when people say one day you helped them get dressed/put their seat belt on/spoon fed them/helped them bathe and suddenly they were doing it themselves and you didn't even realise it happening. It's perfectly OK to mourn parts of dependency on you as a mother disappearing

Of course you are not being ridiculous. My 16 month old has only been feeding on an evening for a couple of months. He recently started messing about instead of feeding so I made the choice to stop. Even though it was my choice I still feel sad that he no longer needs me like he did. I think hormones also play a part. It will get better.

Not ridiculous at all. I’m still feeding my nearly 2 year old, and feel pretty ambivalent about it. I sometimes just want it to stop, but I know I will feel so sad when it’s over. I guess it’s the quiet one on one time that I will miss. Can you make an equivalent time for your child elsewhere in your day or week? This might help ameliorate your feelings.

Of course you’re not being ridiculous. It is such an intimate part of how you mother, and a relationship that only the two of you share. It maybe feels strange given you hated it at first, but all the more important that you overcame those feelings based on what she was telling you she wanted. Hormones definitely play a part like pp said. And as for the self weaning, I can understand feeling bad about that, as you know it has been important to her, but you don’t say anything that suggests she’s not coping with the change. You can’t help having to work. But let yourself feel the feelings, they will pass. I was amazed that when I stopped feeding my 2 and a bit yr old that within 6mo she’d forgotten that she ever did it! And it was such a big deal for me!

Thank you! I think hormones are probably playing a part in making me feel so weepy about it. The first morning when I wasn’t there she seemingly was a bit upset and asking for feed but she has been fine since. I think when she was younger I found it so draining and time consuming because she was constantly attached to me but recently since it was just morning feeds it’s been nice and quiet one on one time which has been nice. At least she doesn’t seem bothered by it; I’ll just need to get over it!

You aren’t being ridiculous at all. I fed my first son until he was 2.5 years old and I felt very sad when he stopped.

My second son is just over 2 years old and I’m still feeding him and I dread the day he stops. I will feel incredibly sad when he does because this is my last baby and the thought of never breast feeding again makes me feel a bit empty

Hormones can be a nightmare!! You don’t have to “get over it” though as there’s nothing wrong with feeling sad about something meaningful coming to an end