HELP - baby losing weight & a bottle refuser

[littleleeleanne]

My DS is 7 months old on 2/4... only weighing in at 11lb 12oz (birth weight 5lb 2oz) and is a complete bottle refuser & also has a cows milk allergy! Not even on a centile.

I have been convinced for a very long time that it's my milk that is causing the slow weight gain, he drinks from both boobs each time but not for a decent amount of time.

As he has low weight he's under the dietician care who are TOTALLY useless. He has three meals a day (including meat, veg, fruits, oats, etc, massive variety with added 'calories' (a powder prescribed by the hospital)) but after nearly 3 weeks of this we are only 5oz up which is no different than if he was just being BF.

I am DESPERATE for him to formula feed as I believe this is where the problem lies, but he just flat out refuses it. He has now started waking up every two hours in the night to feed again like he's a newborn! We've tried MAM, Nuk, Tommee Tippee, Munchkin, Tesco own brand, varying different sippy cups, my milk, formula milk, mixed, hotter than normal, cold milk, slow teats, fast teats, I even went on a BF strike for 3 days and he took about 5oz of milk a day and then stopped all food on the 4th day and he only took about 10oz all day. This is through the mass screaming, pushing back, back arching, thrashing around. We've tried my other half doing it, my Mum, me going out for 5 hours and he just refuses everything. The dumb dietician tried to tell me he doesn't need milk 🤦🏽‍♀️

The most annoying thing ever is that he will take water from a cheap sippy cup, slowly!

I am at my wits end and fed up with people saying 'oh he's tiny' .... ANY suggestions please? 😢

Could you possibly weight him before and after each feed? Sorry not sure what to suggest but didn't want to read and run when you're obviously at such a loss. I'm just wondering if he's actually taking much when he breastfeeds.
Have you seen those tubes to feed babies whilst they are breastfeeding to give them extra, I'm not sure exactly how they work but maybe you could see about adding some other milk whilst he's feeding.

How much is he actually eating? Is there someway to work out in terms of calories and try to estimate how much weight he should (roughly) be gaining??? If the two are nowhere near adding up then it might suggest something else going on...

I'd also really really push for some more tests, or help or something. I'm sure you are doing your very best for him and are trying everything but you don't seem to have any confidence in the treatment he's having so push and push until you feel better about it.

Have you tried formula in a sippy cup or whatever he drinks his water from?

Mine was very low weight too. We had to feed him lots of carbs so extra potato to help with weight gain rather than just fruit and veg.

My 3 mo will only take breastflow bottles. It's a different feeding action to regular bottles and more like breastfeeding.
Initially I put a bit of sugar water on the bottle teat to get him to take it, they do this in SCBU sometimes if baby won't take a bottle.

Yes tried milk out of his sippy cup which he just refuses too... so stubborn! It's my milk too that we have been trying him with.

Managed to get about three ounces in him earlier after a breast feed by literally tipping it in his mouth - are there any good cups to do this out of as it's really hard to do?

I agree and don't think he's taking much breast milk - I know ish what kind of calories he's having, we give him these little coconut lemon pots, they're tiny and those alone have 100 calories in, along with all the other food he takes. I wouldn't even know how to work out how many calories v how much he should be gaining?

He has another blood test on Monday and I'm seeing the dietician on Tuesday but I just want to cry because every time I feed him I know it's not enough for him 👎🏽

Would it be possible for you to see a board certified lactation consultant? You can find one privately but some health boards have them. They could do pre and post weights and evaluate suck just in case of a mechanical problem. So sorry you aren't getting the help you need.

Thanks for everyone's help.
He should roughly be having around 4 feeds a day with 7-8 oz.... currently since 5.30am this morning he's had 2oz!

Are you completely dairy free?
8oz is a huge feed volume and if he's used to breastfeeding he probably isn't able to take that much. Would 6 feeds of 3oz be more achievable?

Agree with pp who suggested a lactation consultant

We are currently not taking any formula milk, my OH managed to get him to take 4oz of my expressed milk last night after a very small BF and he slept like an angel as he had a full tummy. We've been trying all day again as usual and we are getting nowhere. Not once have we actually managed to get 8oz into him, his tummy just isn't big enough for that - it's just what is 'advised'

Got all the bottles/cups out today and we've tried nearly 20 different ones over a period of a couple of months.

Lactation consultant sounds a good idea, that'll be my next step if nothing happens after the dietician on Tuesday.

Have you tried breast compression while feeding? It's a really good way of getting more milk into them, keep them actively feeding and increasing your supply.

I would also have a think about other things he may be allergic to. DS has allergies and I didn't realise about one of them until he was two years old which caused similar problems with weight gain.

8oz of breastmilk is loads. You shouldn't be looking at breastmilk in the same way as formula. It doesn't work like that. kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/pumping/milkcalc/ please read this. It sounds like there is something else going on that is causing the low weight gain.

Hi OP,

I have a just turned 7 month old who is breast fed, has poor weight gain and is also CMPA.

He was born on the 91st percentile and is now just under the 25th.

I’ve seen three lactation consultants and my son has had a tongue tie repair done twice.

I have tried every bloody cup and bottle going and he absolutely refuses to drink from anything. Initially I was trying to offer him the prescription formula and thought the taste was why he didn’t want it but he refuses to take my expressed milk either. I tried for well over two months to try and get him to take a bottle/cup but then I just gave up because it was never going to happen.

In my eyes he breast feeds really well, I have no concerns, lots of wet and dirty nappies, he’s hydrated and happy, hitting all his milestones etc, it’s just his weight.

Sometimes he will gain well, some times it will be adequate, sometimes it will be poor and on a few occasions he’s actually lost weight.

It was put to me that he might be CMPA when he was 8 weeks of age and I’ve been bwwn dairy free since he was 10 weeks old. He’s also on Rantitidinw for Silent Reflux. He also has a heart murmur which I have been told is completely innocent but we are seeing Cardiology in a few months time.

I’m waiting for my first Dietician appointment which is in about 5 weeks and we have been referred to the Paediatric team at our local hospital due to his weight.

We have been weaning for about 4 weeks now and it’s a very slow process as I’m sure you know too well. I can’t see that anything I’m giving him is going to add to his weight, especially as most of it ends up on the floor or in his hair anyway.

You have my sympathies OP - it’s really frustrating.

Oh my god @QueenofmyPrinces I had to double check I wasn't reading my own post!

My LO also has a tongue tie sorted, that's the most annoying thing... he started off life on a bottle with my expressed milk (I exclusively pumped for 2 and a half weeks! 😮)

My OH can get our LO to just about take some breast milk in a bottle but there is NO consistency with any thing/any time we try... although it does normally involve nursery rhymes on my iPhone in his face.

He breast feeds like a dream when he's actually latched, then he pulls off after such a short time (just enough to get him by it feels like) then it's a massive mission to get him back on, but with bum tapping and holding him into position he will go back on and feed on and off for longer, my question is he wouldn't feed for longer if he was full so I know he doesn't take enough in when he does his little spurt of quick feeding. Again, at night he feeds for such a short time hence why he wakes like a newborn! He does have wet and dirty nappies, although I did think his nappies haven't looked as full recently but we've got up a size so I think it's that. He is such a happy, content, non crying baby!

Ditto with the gaining, maintaining & loosing. He was weighed last Wednesday and gained 1oz in 10 days yet he was weighed again today (because he had a blood test for his thyroid, was unaware he was going to be weighed otherwise wouldn't have done it last week) he has gained 6oz since Wednesday. But then the hospital almost convinced me that it was a fluke, different scales, could need a poo etc.

Ever since I found out about the allergy I have stopped eating dairy too, I noticed a difference within a day.... it was only dreadful wind being his side affect, the big problem kicked in when we tried to give him formula.

I think I'm quite lucky with the weaning, he eats beef, chicken, veggies, fruit, coconut yoghurts, hummus, breadsticks etc.

I'm finding it so hard to get him into a routine, everyday is so different!

I have said for probably months now I'm convinced it's my breastmilk, and that it's not high enough in calories. But there's obviously no way of proving that! All I could do is bottle feed him for a week, see what his weight gain is and go from there... wishful thinking eh?

@fleetingthinker yes I do breast compressions! Missed your comment sorry. What was your DS allergic too? Currently we are being told to avoid soya and cows milk. I'm weary of nuts due to it being in the family.

I was talking amount formula milk not breast milk, sorry for the confusion but thanks for the link.

Have you considered syringe feeding? We had to do it with DD when she was newborn; I don't know if it would work with an older baby. I will warn you that it's very labour intensive and slow, so pretty much a last resort!

My son had his first tongue tie repair done at 9 days of age. When his weight started noticeably plateauing at about 3.5 months of age I had his tongue function reassessed and it was really poor and he had the procedure done again.

Prior to the second division I was lucky if he ever fed for more than 2 minutes and when he was feeding he was constantly on and off the breast. He’d have about 5 sucks, come off, be desperate to get back on but then have a few sucks again and come off again until he eventually just gave up.

The lactation consultant said his tongue function was so poor that he simply couldn’t form a suction, hence the constant coming off the nipple, and that due to his inability to feed effectively he was able to get the foremilk but physically couldn’t manage the hard work of getting the hind, calorific milk.

I had the procedure done 3 days after her assessment and the difference in his feeding was unbelievable. Since having it done just before Christmas he now floats around the 25th percentile line and hasn’t dropped any further down the chart so I’m happy he can at least maintain his line now. I plot his weights on an App that was recommended to me and since the procedure he has always been somewhere between the 22nd and 26th percentile whereas prior to the procedure he was slowly dropping down the chart each time I had him weighed.

I was advised that if I was giving any puréed food, or porridge, or cereals etc than I could try mixing them with formula instead of water or expressed milk as a way of getting calories into him. Is that something you could do or is he fully BLW?

What formula are you using? Is it neocate or nutramigen? If so, they taste hideous so that could be a good reason why he doesn't take it. With my dairy-free DD1 I used it to make rice pudding or custard with pureed fruit mixed in and got quite a lot in that way. She also had terrible reflux and only ever drank fairly small amounts of formula after she was weaned. DD2 was also dairy-free but could tolerate soya. If it turns out you could try him on soya, alpro do a toddler soya milk with extra calories.

@QueenofmyPrinces your DC sounds very like my DD1 at that age. She was born on 98th centile and gradually dropped through the centiles until she was between the 50th and 25th. She had reflux and was intolerant to dairy, soya, wheat and eggs. She barely put on any weight at all between 6 and 9 months and I was incredibly worried. We were under the paediatrician and dietician. Turns out with hindsight that she was just born big as I had a healthy placenta and she was settling to get natural weight. She is now 8 and still between the 25th and 50th centiles for both height and weight. Follow the medical advice you are given, of course, but be aware that it is not necessarily a problem.

Yes DS is allergic to dairy and soy. Didn't realise he was also allergic to eggs until he was 2 yrs and had problems with weight gain and sleep until then.

I breastfed him for 2.5 years and cut all those out my diet. The proteins travel through breast milk. I realised after a year I had to be ultra strict about it, esp the soy. Couldn't eat 'may contain' allergy labels, soy is in absolutely everything. It was tough but you get used to it. DS is 6 now and still allergic so it was good grounding for his diet.

My LO is going into hospital on Monday for further tests 😢 my emotions are all over the shop.
They've said that the 'community' health visitors, Dieticians etc have done everything they can and the added calories in his food just aren't working.

Every bone is my body is crossed that he'll be ok.

Bumping for you OP. Big hugs to you and your boy for Monday.

I had an outright bottle refuser, and a poor eater with it, but he had enough weight about him that he didn't end up under dietician care; I can only imagine how stressful the last few months have been for you.

Try and see Monday as a positive - this is where you get answers. Get yourself a note pad ready and note down questions you want to ask (tongue tie? allergies?,) names and job titles when you meet people and some nice snacks for you in the hospital.

How are things going?

Hi @QueenofmyPrinces ... my DS now has an NG tube down :( we spent 4 days in hospital & every test came back fine. I personally think it was my milk! Fingers crossed he gains weight as when we went into hospital he had lost weight argh! 7 month old weighing 12.2!