Am I feeding my baby too much?

[Apfelbunny]

Basically that...

Little monster is 5 months old (weighed 14lb something at 4 and a half months) and we ventured tentatively into solids at about 4 months.

Typically an hour or 2 after an initial milk feed I do a portion of that Heinz porridge stuff (actually quite tasty).
Then maybe a small amount of toast at lunch - though not always
Dinner is another portion of porridge (tried jars of veg but they end up on the floor whereas porridge ends on hands, chin, nose, hair, feet etc) - sometimes I do a jar of fruit as well because often the monster acts totally ravenous, I do do milk feeds as and when I feel I should or pre-nap.
I also feed at bed time (about 2 hours after dinner and at least once at night)

The reason I have some doubts is based on
'adcice' from mil that I shouldn't feed unless baby is crying and I don't let baby cry 'enough' - I go by body language, sometimes by crying as well, at night time if a 5 month old baby is awake they're hungry so I feed before the crying starts.

I've tried more 'solid' solids than porridge (the addiction is getting expensive) but we've not really gone beyond toast and bread - thicker lumpy porridge with bits ends up with grumpy face.

Baby shouldn't need anything other than milk for first 6 months.

If you are determined to wean then how about using real food rather than jars? It doesn't matter if it ends up on the floor/in their hair etc. All their nutrients will be coming from their milk anyway.

With regards to milk feeds, I would feed on demand at this age, and prioritise milk feeds over solids. Crying is the very last feeding cue, so ideally you would give a milk feed when you notice much earlier feeding cues than full on crying, so I don't agree with what your MIL is suggesting.

Have you asked her why she thinks that more crying is a good thing? I can't think why you'd want a baby to cry more.

Shouldn't really be having bread as it contains gluten. Fruit and veg would be better. Mashed banana, avocado, sweet potato, squash, carrot, etc are good starter foods

Apfelbunny I would say you need to take advice from your health visitor. Do you have a local baby clinic you could visit?

Technically baby shouldn't be eating until 6 months that's always hard to do and look at babies weight as to how many feeds. The HV will help you calculate feeds and then perhaps you can get into a routine. I think at 5 months it was only milk for my children and they would feed 7,11,3,7 and prob 6oz a feed

You sound like you're doing fine. Ignore MIL, crying isn't a good way to judge how much food a baby is getting! Feeding on demand is recommended these days which means paying attention to feeding cues which occur well before crying and then not forcing them to take more than they want when they are done.

Agree with all above. Your baby does not need anything other than milk until 6 months.

If you insist on given food before 6 months then veg and fruit only.

I would definitely not be giving baby porridge.

Babies get most of their nutrients from their milk feeds until about 12 months so they should be your main focus and milk feeds shouldn't be restricted and should be given before food.

They don't need solid food until about 6 months and then fruit and veg are the best things to give. Bread and porridge should only be given in moderation because if they get full with these they will never get enough of the nutrients they need from milk.

There is no reason to let a baby cry? So your instincts are right.

Babies don't need food til approx 6 months, they get all they need from milk. I definitely wouldn't be giving toast. Or anything really at 4-5 months.

Oops, should of guessed when we started on food was going to cause a stir.

For the record my HV said feeding that early was ok so long as i took it slowly and followed baby cues about hunger and still had more milk feeds. I was also told more mush than anything until after 6 months and the porridge and jars were actually reccomended to me (time and waste saving) and I was also told toast was ok at 5 months.

I do offer food from my plate too if it's not something too processed or salty - a Sunday roast goes down a treat!

You could try switching to rolled oats/real porridge instead of the Heinz jars. The jars might have added sugar which can be addictive and does not fill you up. Cheaper too.

14Ibs doesn't sound too heavy but check your growth charts, if there's been a sudden leap then you'll know.

You're doing right by not letting baby cry, you are mum (or dad?), you know the signs of hunger and you don't need to wait for a cry x

I never really understand why anyone wants to wean early, it's so much easier when all they're on is milk!

Ditch the jarred food, I am not averse to the odd pouch but it should not make up most of their diet.

Agree that it sounds like you know your baby and are reading their cues appropriately. Roast dinners were early favourites in our house too - vegetables are soft enough you don't need to do anything more with them. Probably not till a bit after 6 months, but I always used to put some meat and gravy in the blender as well so it was the first real family meal they participated in.

And toast is not ok at 5 months unless your baby can sit unsupported as it's a choking risk.

This little beastie can virtually stand in aided and sits at the table with us.
The porridge is that powdered stuff, I can only imagine how awful jarred porridge would be!!
I give soft fruits as well, it's just the initial preference was the cow and gate jars of fruit which are only fruit (apparently) so I don't see the problem with them

Growth charts all look ok, it's just that dc1 was small so now I've got a 'normal' sized baby it feels weird - dc1 was about 9 months old when they were the size dc2 is at 5 months

My ds was having 8oz bottles 9 times a day, when I started weaning at 4 months as well. He was big/strong/99th centile and more than ready for it. Do what is right for your baby, 6 months is only a guideline. I mainly prepared purees myself, tried some Ella's kitchen and they are delicious!

Honestly MIL's reasoning is so bonkers I think it can be sagely ignored regardless of what you're feeding baby, it's not totally inappropriate. The idea that we should only feed them fruit and vegetables for weeks on end is very dated but still lingers. Proper porridge, even the smooth milled stuff, is much more nutritious than a bit of carrot mush or apple sauce. And if youve given gluten already no need to go back. It's a risk when you first introduce potential allergens in case they react, it doesn't induce the allergy itself to keep giving though.

Safely I mean

The initial toast taste was accidental and down to me eating toast and forgetting I was holding the baby...So the toast was stolen from my hands (and nothing can wrestle food from the hands of a determined baby! I'm sure if it had had Marmite on all future toast would be safe)

I'd ditch the Heinz porridge as it contains palm oil and maltodextrine. Switch to Ready Brek which has added vitamins and minerals or plain porridge oats.

Yeah I seem to recall DS snatching a flapjack out of my hands when he was about 20 weeks old. How, I have no idea in hindsight but I wrote it in my journal at the time so I know it happened then. So he had all the things you're supposed to avoid! Then moved onto toast because we were in a cafe and cucumber which was hilarious because he hated it but kept licking it curiously anyway.

Haha. Nothing is safe in this house. Not even drinks. The other morning I had coffee perched on the microwave so I could drink it through a straw without grabby hands trying to steal the cup!

Sara, I am so sorry for your loss, what a terrible thing to happen. It might be more appropriate to start your own thread for support and advice on whether you'd be able to make a complaint to the hospital?

I've let mnhq know of your post so they can move it if they think that's better.

I did the same Bertie :0) I figured this thread wasn't the right sort of 'traffic'