problems with wind

[freyasiobhan]

Hi, really need advice. My second son is 5 weeks old and breastfed. My husband works nights. I have a muscle condition which amongst other things results in weak wrists. My son is incredibly hard to wind. I have tried every position that I can think of or find online. As a result he screams in pain after each night feed. Occasionally he does bring it up and then sleeps in his moses basket but most of the time if I hold him upright on me he can drop off but shuffles and screams with pain every 10-15 mins until an hour or so after the feed when he throws up. I need ideas. At the moment all I can think is he needs to go into temporary foster care and hopefully one day I'd get him back but I can't bear to do it. My husband can't switch from nights to days and there isn't anyone else to help at night time. Please, there must be something I can do? I sat and cried as he screamed and was going to look up the number for local social services but thought I would try here first. It must sound so stupid but I hope it makes some sense and that someone has the advice I need

No one? Please. I reslly don't know how ro help him and if I have to give him up I know my family will never understand

Hi
Sorry you had no replies so far. There will be more helpful people who will come along, I just wanted to offer a handhold. I've been at the depths of despair through windy baby in the past, it does get better I promise, but that won't help right now!

Have you tried infacol? That worked really well for us, you have to stick with it though, it's not an instant solution, it has to build up in their system before it works (I think about a week of giving before every feed) but it really did help our boy with his wind.

Gripe water is good too but they have to be a bit older for that (I can't exactly remember how old sorry)

You won't have to give him up, stick with it. It will get better. Try speaking to your health visitor too, they might have some more ideas

I'm a little out of touch with babies but my ds was incredibly hard to wind.

He didn't get sick after feeds but cried for hours with awful pains.

I found the first few months of his life really stressful. I just couldn't cope with the crying.

Personally looking back on it i was definitely postnatally depressed. My gp touched on it numerous times but i lied because i was terrified they would take him away. I had no reason for this as he was perfectly cared for, it was me who was exhausted and because he was my first I had nothing to compare it to.

I wish i had spokento my gp honestly as my dc's first few months could have been so different.

No one understands what a windy baby is like unless you have one. It's so hard. The hardest thing I've ever done. I thought all babies were like this until i had my second.

Because you said your baby is getting sick, could it be reflux? Please speak to your gp about this as well.

For what its worth my ds is now a fantastic 9 year old whom i love more than anything. He his the highlight of every day. Good luck op. Remember it doesn't last forever

Thank you. I will try the gp and ask about infacol. I just wish I could help him now as there is such a wait!

You can just buy it from the chemist and it's suitable from birth (I have a bottle next to me!)

I have a very windy twin that needs it (she just screams when you put her down) and one that is fine without. Very frustrating!

You can get infacol off the shelf in supermarkets or any shop. If you start on some today, you might start seeing a difference in the next couple of days. It wasn't a complete fix for us, but it definitely helped

You can buy infacol in boots along with gripe water and colief. All products I tried with both of my dc. It will get better. He is still so tiny and things change so quickly at that age. Screaming for an hour before being sick rings alarm bells for me though . Your baby might have acid reflux requiring gp intervention.

Having said that go to the gp for you as well. Even just to have someone to talk to to support you through it. You sound like you might have PND.

Likewise, see a breastfeeding advisor. There might be a problem with latch and he is taking in too much air. He could be tongue tied.

And remember breastfeeding is one option. My ds was like this (not gaining weight either). I was at the end of my tether until my dh insisted on bottle. My son's eyes almost popped out of his head. He downed the lot, minimal wind and we never looked back. I did combination feeding and it worked.

Infacol you can buy from most places and I would recommend! When he is up on your shoulder/chest can you rub his back in a circular motion that often worked when ds was little. This may be too hard for your wrists but it is worth a mention sitting him on your lap and the holding his chest and back and rotating him around in circles or laying him on his back and bicyling his legs!

If you have the money a night nanny could take some of the pressure off for a couple nights a week!

I wish we could afford a night nanny but we can't.
I know he isn't tongue tied and his latch is ok as we had a week in hospital after his birth and they were checked. I will ask about reflux though.
I probably do have pnd - pretty sure I had it with my first son but never diagnosed and never treated- he was 9 months old before I felt anything for him and nearly got abandoned in various places but I couldn't stand the thought of my husbands reaction so I went back each time!

Cookielove-i've tried the first 2 methods you suggest with no luck but will try bicycling next time he feeds

Gosh, please don't think you would have to give up your baby just because you're struggling with wind. It is really hard and will be even more exhausting at night when your husband is at work. Do you have any family or friends that could help out? You sound like you need some support.
Do speak to the gp about both the wind and how you are feeling in yourself. They are there to help. They had to keep an eye on me after having dd2 as I was very down due to heath complications after the birth but I never felt like they would get social services involved unnecessarily and 3 months later I'm feeling much better in myself, even though dd still has reflux issues!
Good luck getting it sorted

Fx something works soon! The infacol really worked for ds but it does take a while to build up in his system so if it does work it won't be a quick fix!

This maybe clutching at straws but you could try your local college if they have any childcare students who maybe able to come in at night to help you!

If it's reflux hopefully the Dr will prescribe something :)

The local college might be an idea, thank you!
No family who can help and no friends that near. I have a friend here today as I got desperate and begged! She has spent the last 3 and a half hours winding him and had no success. At least I know my wrists arnt the problem

Have a word with your HV - they might be able to refer you for some help from SureStart.

Also - are his poo's ok? Normal colour/consistency etc? 3.5hrs to try and wind definitely isn't normal

Yes, poo totally normal. What is surestart?

It's a service to help families. They have centres I think, but there are also volunteers that can come to the house to help you for a few hours a week, but you have to be referred.
www.gov.uk/find-sure-start-childrens-centre

Sounds wonderful! Thank you

Oh yeah, ask your hv about Home Start. It's a service where volunteers come and help you at home. Really useful if you don't have much family near.