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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

3 month old slow weight gain anxiety

27 replies

Kidspetsandcakes · 05/05/2016 21:19

Hi all, this is my first post and I'm not certain it's in the right place so please bear with me..

I took my 12 week old to be weighed yesterday and in 3 weeks she has only put on 8 ounces and so has dropped almost a whole costume (and she was only daddy to begin with). I am bf on demand and have been since birth. HV advised me to top dd up with expressed milk after feeds, which I have been trying but she doesn't want to take it... she will have a few sucks then spit the teat out... she has also recently started the play about at the end of bf - unlatching and relatching, pulling back and stretching the nipple, waving head from side to side or turning away and smiling, etc. I just don't think she's hungry... I'm at a bit of a loss with what to try now... anyone got any tips?

If it is relevant, she is my 3rd child, she sleeps what I consider a normal amount for her age, is generally alert and happy and has plenty of wet/ dirty nappies...

Sorry for the essay..

OP posts:

MonsterClaws · 05/05/2016 21:23

Your Hv sucks.
Offer more feeds and more sides per feed aim for 3 and see how you do. If you offer proactively you can often get more feeds in and more milk in. Some babies don't ask S much especially when entertained by siblings...
You have no indications of a supply of transfer issue in what you say here so whilst your baby may be where genetics dictate if you offer more milk it might make a difference. If you top up, one bigger feed per day is better and easier

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 05/05/2016 21:30

Thanks, I will try more frequent feeds, she is currently feeding about every 2-3 hours during the day but will do one 6 hour stretch at night..

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MonsterClaws · 05/05/2016 21:46

With that pattern you can probably squeeZe a fair few more in - personally I might leave the big sleep and aim for 1.5-2.5 in the day instead. See how it goes, some babies are meant to be smaller than average - all those positions on the centipede chart are equally valid and babies can cross two centiles without being at all unusual. When they cross more or drop off the bottom a referral for a check up is usual but most of these babies are still just doing what they need to...

Great that she is happy and alert etc:)

Tumtitum · 08/05/2016 11:02

Hello, my DD is also 12 weeks and is on the small side. She sounds very similar to yours, I offer her extra feeds but if she's not hungry she just won't have any of it and screams if I try to hard to coax her! So she's definitely not starving (no reflux issues or anything like that) and like your little one is very happy and lots of wet and dirty nappies so I'll assume they are just meant to be small! (Either that or they'll have one hell of a growth spurt at a later date! )

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 08/05/2016 12:15

Thanks, I have been trying to feed more often and sometimes she takes it and sometimes she just isn't interested... hv has made me an appointment with a lactation consultant for tomorrow afternoon. I don't really see what they can do as I'm confident she is latching correctly etc, but we shall see... tumtitum my 1st dd was also small at this age (though she was formula fed ) and is now 8 and one of the taller girls in her class... growth spurts are a definite possibility! :)

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Tumtitum · 09/05/2016 13:52

I saw a lactation consultant privately and they did help with our latch as she had tongue tie, but I've been back to see her since then and she's helped with other things, such as understanding some of her fussy behaviours and reassuring me by weighing her before and after feeds so I can see that even if she only feeds for a short amount of time she is chugging a relatively big amount of milk still!

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 09/05/2016 14:14

That sounds really good it'always nice to get some reassurance :) the lady I saw today pretty much told me to just take dd to get weighed again next week and if she doesn't put on she will refer her to a tongue tie clinic (but she doesn't think that's it, she's just "ticking boxes" - her words)

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Tumtitum · 09/05/2016 15:23

Huh, helpful!! Did she not check for a tongue tie? I was lucky I think as the LC I saw was a TT specialist too so she did it all. At least she didn't have any other concerns I guess!!

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 09/05/2016 15:52

She saw dd when she was about 3 weeks old because a friend of mine (works in the local NICU) said to get her checked for a tie and but at the time the lc (same lady) said she thought it was just a muscular one (weak muscles) rather than an actual tie... dd does stick her tongue out though so I don't really think she has one, just when she was younger she wouldn't really move her tongue and she used to click when feeding and have a few other signs which have all since cleared up... :)

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mrswishywashy · 10/05/2016 20:40

Sounds like my daughter.
Born 5lb5oz.
Had tongue tie done at six weeks which stopped the screaming.
Went dairy free at 10 weeks which stopped the constipation.
Her growth curve has bumped up and down between the 0.4 and 2nd centile, she never gains what she "should". The feeding group I go to is the most supportive explains that it's ok to go up in steps instead of the hard and fast lone in book. As long as they are going up, nappies are good and they are meeting milestones then it's best to look at whole picture.
My baby is now 6.5 months and weaning and had her weighed today and she is now right in the 2nd centile. HV said "that's good you're fattening her up nicely". I'm not going back again, I find their terminology a bit grim. For the bast six months they've been worrying me because she's not putting on the "right" amount and now she's on the 2nd they say its cos she's getting fat. How about they mention how healthy and strong she is?

I hope you get the support you need. Someone has to be down charts.

squizita · 11/05/2016 13:13

Mine grew slowly at first then had powerful spurts later. Her centile line looks like steps IYSWIM, but averaged out the same. She has been between the 2nd and 9th percentiles, so tiny.

My HV was supportive and told me all was well, so long as she was healthy and gaining. My HV also noted I am small and skinny, so she would expect a healthy but small child!

I was advised to feed regularly, offer each boob twice, and do compressions - though this was as much for my own reassurance as anything else!

MigGril · 11/05/2016 13:28

So your baby is gaining weight yes, is happy and healthy, it's having lots of wet and dirty nappies and had a good feeding pattern. 2-3 hours during the day and one long stretch of 6 hours at night. I take it feeds are pain free as well?

If he's to all of the above then your doing a great job, very few babies stay on one line and HV shouldn't be pestering you to top up unless there is a drop of 2 centeile and baby doesn't appear to be doing well. The fact she won't take a top up shows she doesn't need it.

Her starting to mess around as you put it towards the end of a feed often happens around this age. Babies get bigger and more efficient, feed times get shorter they can get more milk faster. I would just swap sides at this point, she may take more sides sometimes if she's a bit more hungry.

But overall sounds like your actually do a good job.

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 11/05/2016 14:46

Just got back from weigh in... dd has gained 1.5oz in a week..so still hovering between 2nd and 9th. HV said to keep coming back weekly until she picks up.. also spoke to LC again who said to try giving her to my partner to top up using a cup... I've decided to not let the hv worry me about her weight as long as she consistency gains something and is still happy and active... :)

Thanks for all the supportive messages guys, you've calmed me down no end... :)

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MigGril · 11/05/2016 14:51

Op is there no other health concerns?

Weekly weight in are really not very beneficial as babies weight can vary to much when being weighed so often. There are plenty of direct feeding methods to increase milk intake don't stress about trying to top her up.

MigGril · 11/05/2016 15:01

You mite find this link really helpful kellymom.com/health/growth/weight-gain_increase/#causes

Dellarobia · 11/05/2016 15:03

My DS1 dropped from 75th percentile at birth to 25th percentile at 3 months. He was perfectly healthy in all other ways, and now he's a tall active 10yo. Some babies don't stick to the percentiles!

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 11/05/2016 15:16

MigGril no other health concerns :) she is a bright happy 3 month old as far as I can tell. HV insists I take her every week as I told her to jog on when she suggested I switch to Formula just to get her weight up .. if I thought she was hungry or if she wasn't putting any weight on of course I would switch her over, but I don't see that it's necessary right now

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mrswishywashy · 11/05/2016 15:54

Great weight gain. If you're ok with weekly weigh ins that's fine but you don't need to have her weighed that often. Taking my daughter gave me anxiety and I only ever went monthly, one HV wanted me to for fortnightly and I said no as I can see she is otherwise fine.

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 11/05/2016 16:47

I was taking her every week when she was first born because HV wanted to keep an eye on me (I have a history of post natal depression and general anxiety disorder). The first time I left it for 3 weeks (advice from different health visitor) all this started and I was told she should have put on double what she had... :(

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mrswishywashy · 11/05/2016 20:34

It's annoying to have different advice. I get so anxious now about weigh ins. It's not how the system should be.

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 11/05/2016 21:04

I agree, you look to a hv to be your first point of call for advice and reassurance and you get contradictions and more worries.. it's not right.. I'm not sure there's anything to be done about it though..

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MigGril · 12/05/2016 09:26

Sorry I half typed a reply last night then had to dash out and didn't finish it.

The problem with weekly weight in its that you see fluctuations in weight gain which is why is not always great to weigh so often epically if a baby seems otherwise healthy. A big pool or wee before a weigh in can make a difference and just make mums more anxious. Fine if the HV want to see you more often but they don't need to weigh your baby each time just to have a chat.

Normally only a drop of 2 centials would be a medical problem then this should trigger a refurral to a pediatrician. Even then most of the babies they see are still healthy just slow to gain weight.

I'm concered th lactation consulate has gone straight to top up before suggesting anything else. There are many ways to increase babies milk intake at the breast before introducing to pups which many ebf babies don't readly except.

Monsterclaws suggestions of reducing the spacing of feeds during the day is a good one. You'll find more information on the link I added to.

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 12/05/2016 10:34

Thanks MigGril, I will look at that link when I get home. I will speak to the hv at the next weigh in about not weighing her every week, but they have told me to bring her for weighing every week so they can keep an eye on her.. I have been trying to feed her more regularly but anything less than 2 hours and she just tefuses... she will have a couple of mouthfuls then. Turn her head away and start playing like she normally does at the end of the feed... I do offer her both sides (with a burp in the middle) twice but she only normally takes extra just before bed...

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Tumtitum · 13/05/2016 08:07

My DD was weighed yesterday and is 5kg now, they were happy she seems to be following the 9th centile now. First time since she regained her birth weight that I've been told she's gaining well!!

Original poster

Kidspetsandcakes · 13/05/2016 09:02

Well done Tumtitum :) hope she continues to do well :)

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