Is ds2 clingy because he is breastfed?

[Racheyg]

Advice needed please.....
Ds2 is 28 weeks and breastfed with the occasional fm bottle at night.

Oh thinks that ds2 is clingy and sleeps bad because he is breastfed. He wakes 2/3 times a night for a fed but past 3 nights won't go in his cot at all, and has ended up sleeping on me. He wouldn't even settle in our bed.

Is it time for me to start weaning off the breast? We did start weaning but he keeps throwing up all the food I give him.

He whines if not held all the time it's becoming exhausting

I have 4dc, 2 have been formula fed and 2 have been breast fed (bottle refusers) none of them have been clingy or been bad sleepers.

Some people will tell you it's because he's breastfed, it's because you cuddle him too much, because you let him sleep in you... I'd say he just wants comfort. Maybe he's teething, maybe he feels worried, lots of babies go through phases like this and I, personally would ride through it, do whatever I needed to get enough sleep (co-sleep, feed etc). I read that real food doesn't give them as many nutrients as milk so weaning is not the sleeping cure some say it is.

I hope he sleeps better soon. I feel for you, my baby cried most of last night and no comfort helped...

I think it's nothing to do with the feeding, and everything to do with the child - I've BF both of mine (until 2.5, and until 8 months) - both went through clingy phases, both are now happy, independent toddlers.

All kids are different, this phase will pass.

Sounds like he just needs comfort at the moment for whatever reason. If he's not sleeping well it sounds like something is up - could just be teething, coming down with a cold or something. My theory is that if you are always there to provide that comfort for them when they are babies they will grow into confident independent little people because they can trust you. I wouldn't think it's to do with breastfeeding.

It won't be because he's breastfed, it's his personality.

At this age your son is learning that you still exist when he can't see you (before now it was if I can't see you, you don't exist), and so it can promote separation anxiety in some kids. Nothing to do with bottle/breast feeding.

It will pass, just continue to reassure him that you are there and if you leave a room that you are coming back. Don't make a big deal of it and he should get better at coping.

Best of luck.

Thanks guys.
Ds1 was so different, and I only fed him till 4 months so that's why oh thought it must be the feeding.

I agree that this sounds like a comfort thing, please don't try and train him not to need comfort. It is usually a passing phase and babies naturally grow out of it, my ds had a few months of being super clingy so I bought a wrap sling and took the African approach of having him on my back when I had chores to do. I also had a massive wicker truckle that I lined with a sheepskin so I could move him from room to room with me when he slept (we had a massive old house and monitors were useless). We also co-slept till he was 18months/2yo because he would scream in his cot the second I put him down and I feel really strongly against controlled crying. He is 13 now and despite a v disrupted life (violent alcoholic father, numerous house-moves) is super confident and self-assured.
Interestingly (and heartbreakingly) dsd was rarely cuddled and had controlled crying as a baby and she has monumental attachment issues.
Obviously this isn't definitive evidence, but I do think that there is something in it.

Asteria, thanks for sharing I'm sorry to hear of your past. I don't agree with controlled crying either.

I will just carry on bf and cuddling......we will get there one day. I think oh is worried when I go back to work In march