I can't seem to tell when baby's bottle is too warm :-(

[gutted2014]

DS3 is 16 weeks. I ebf until 12 weeks & have gradually introduced some formula, so now he has 3/5 feeds from a bottle of formula & 2/5 bf (plus any top-ups are bf). For the first few weeks he had formula we were using ready-made bottles of milk, so we have only started using powdered formula this week (Thursday).

Since giving him the powdered formula, which we make fresh according to the instructions on the box, I can't seem to tell when it is too warm. When I make the bottle & cool it, test on my wrist, then I hand it to DH, who every time tells me it is 'a bit too warm' then goes & cools it some more (an extra 10 seconds or so). I do test it before I hand it over & I have also tried testing it after DH says it's now OK, but I can't tell the difference . This has happened about 3 times now. When I am on my own with DS, I feed it when I think it feels ready & he drinks it without a problem, doesn't cry or try to pull away.

I am worried I'm going to hurt my baby and embarassed that I should be getting this right as I've mix fed 2 other babies too

If he's only cooling it for an extra 10 seconds or so then that's not going to make a difference. He's being picky.

It should feel neither warm or cold to the touch or on your wrist.

Stop giving DH a chance to be picky perhaps. If it feels ok, don't hand it over. My own DH worries himself (or did when the girls were young) and in the same situation would probably have gone with cooling it for a bit longer just the same, just to be safe.

Ten seconds will make no difference at all. Perhaps your dh feels the need to assert some level of control over the part of feeding her can be involved in.

Tbh I find the idea that he is trying to make out you are making it too hot (you're not because if you were it would still be too hot after ten more seconds) quite nasty and manipulative.

The reason you can't feel a difference is because with ten seconds there won't be a difference to feel. Which means that you got it right, but he wanted you to think you didn't.

Please don't doubt yourself, it's his behaviour that appears strange to me, not yours.

What a queer response that last comment was about your DH, OP! Please do ignore. My own DH is much fussier/paranoid about such things too but in no way 'manipulative'.
Easiest thing you can do is the taste test. My wrist is hopeless at gauging temperature too. Happy feeding and enjoy your baby

I often have this, my solution, drink a bit! You'll know straight away if it's drinking temperature.

Also, as a bottle is good for 2 hours, for your own sanity, can you make it up a bit early so it's just cooled in the bottle for a few minutes?

I think you need to have more confidence in yourself. You say yourself that it's fine when you're on your own. So just don't ask your DH for his opinion!