My baby will only sook to sleep...

[ScotGirl]

My ds (10wk bf) cannot go to sleep without a sook unless he is in the car.
I was getting a bit stressed about this after reading THE books (CLT, whisperer!!) but now I've decided to just enjoy my baby.
However, it makes it difficult for me to leave him. On Saturday I gave him a good feed at lunchtime and he should have slept for 2.5 - 3 hr ( he is very consistent with this nap). I went out and left my husband in charge. He woke after 1hr and screamed (the cry where he stops breathing) for the 15 mins it took me to get home). He had a sook for less than 2 minutes and then feel asleep for 2 hrs!!
We have tried dummies with some sucess but as of last week he seems to have wisended up to them.
I am not prepared to let him cry himself to sleep and would like him to be able to take a dummy again. Can anyone recomend a dummy or a technique that I can use to help me and my husband settle him? (I've tried shush - pat - not impressed!)
Ds is not hungry - sometimes he is so full of milk it is overflowing out his mouth! (he is a pretty pucky baby generally)..

hi i have a 12 week who is a bit like yours. Wants to suck when tired, esp at night time. It has improved as he has got bigger. i do use a dummy occaionally and its the silcone advent one which seem bigger and harder. i only let hime have it till he falls asleep then i renove it sohe doesnt get the idea the he sleeps with it.

Breastmilk contains chemicals that encourage sleep and relaxation for both of you - not just your baby. This is for a reason - your baby is designed to go to sleep after (or during!) breastfeeding. There's nothing wrong with it as you say and I am glad you have decided to throw out the books.

If ds will sleep in the car, how about other forms of rocking / vibrations / white noise? I know some people put the pram by the washing machine, turn the hoover on etc. My ds used to drop off if you jiggled him in the pram for long enough, and interestingly enough it was his dad who got quite expert at this (I was too lazy and would just stick him on the nipple )

Dr. Sears describes a special Daddy comforting routine where the man holds the baby against his chest and sort of croons to it. The vibrations and the motion are very relaxing for little ones.

We also had great success with a ring sling. The baby can lie down in it and you just carry on with whatever you are doing, so they get the calming rocking feeling and also the closeness with your body. My sling was worth it's weight in gold to us.

I must say though, I would try to forget about things like "he should have slept for 2.5 hr". Babies do what they want, generally and not what they should do. He is very young yet and I think you will have an easier time if you just follow his cues and go with the flow (I am allowed to say this as I totally failed to do it with my own son and wish I could have enjoyed that time more instead of looking at the clock )

Hope this helps a little.

\link{http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070300.asp\Scroll down to "Transitioning Techniques"} to get lots of suggestions that don't involve breastfeeding, including the special Daddy snuggle :)

when I was breast feeding I always let my kids comfort suck and fall asleep on the breast. I had no imposed routine nor bed time, they went to bed when I did. At 6m I put in place a bed time when they became fully bottlefed. I had no problems with either child getting them into the routine at that age and it seemed to suit them. I know a lot of those books say you'll never get them to sleep alone etc etc. it's not really been a prob for me.

With dd2 I've tened to let her take her bottle to bed but that's through choice as dd1 didn't need that. With each of them i tried the leaving them to cry thing. dd1 cried the first night for about 10 mins then for about 3 mins each night and dd2 cried a bit longer. I really miss that pre 6m stage when it was more relaxed and when i really enjoyed it but I've found that as they became more active (physically) and more aware my kids preferred a routine and it sort of developed naturally. ie they were tending to go to sleep around that time anyway. Just enjoy the closeness you have with your baby. I'm jealous and broody!

I worried about this too and really shouldn't have as it sorted itself out. Mind you, he's still pretty bad at going for daytime naps without being in the car seat or pram and he's 10 months.

I didn't do a great deal to help DS go to sleep at night on his own, but I do recall that if he fell asleep feeding, then I would lightly rouse him and give him his dummy before putting him in his bed. I'd make sure that his bed was prewarmed with a hot water bottle so he didn't wake fully.

I agree that babies don't do what the books say! my DS obviously hasn't read them anyway!

Try not to stress too much about it. It's hard to see at the time, but these phases really are quite short. And my DS is so uncuddly now that I actually wonder why I didn't enjoy those sleepy cuddles.

I still offer DS my boob if he's upset or overtired or needs to calm down in some way. I'm not sure what I would do without my boobs .

Lots of babies are like this at this age, and not just bf'ers, either. My ds had an entire phase of having to suck on his dad's little finger to go to sleep (never mine, lucky me!), wouldn't take a dummy except under extreme sufferance, so we never pushed the issue.

It all sorted itself out after a few months, so try not to worry.