Worried I'll make the same mistakes again. 4wo DC2 CONSTANT feeding

[caramelgirl]

I am ebf my 26 day old DS. The gaps between his feeds were 2-3 hours day and night. They are gradually decreasing and it feels like he is mostly snacking rather than having a full feed and then sleeping longer.

I had a miserable first six months with his older sister and felt stuck on thr sofa in the day and totally sleep deprived until we fairly painlessly and effortlessly sleep trained her at six months and she was much happier.

DS was diagnosed 80% tongue tie and cut by Ann Dobson (lactation consultant) on day 2.
After seeing breast feeding counsellor I am block feeding as have an over active letdown and over abundant milk, leading to shallow latch and too much air going in.

But when I ask about feeding patterns people tend to say every three or so hours for half an hour, but he'll work out his own pattern.

I am happy to be babyled on this but I think I must have missed cues with DD and I don't know how to do it with DS. I would like some sleep and breaks from nursing- if not now then in a month or two at least. He is thriving and already v fat (his sister went from 25th-98th percentile v quickly and he looks to be on track to do the same).
it he wakes crying it is usually wind, then I change him and then he starts feeding and feeding and feeding. He does tend to nap 1.30-3pm and 8-10pm but these are the only long sleeps I notice.

I have him in bed with me at the moment but don't know if this is storing up problems? I have a co sleeper cot and could put him back in this for the 45 minutes or so between feeds at night?

Sorry this is so long, I thought it was the kind of thing that lactation consultants/breast feeding counsellors helped with but think that they are more physically oriented.

Would be grateful for any advice. Thank you!

I think what you describe is normal. It's quite unusual for a young BF baby to go 3 hours between feeds. If he is gaining weight well, which he is, then I would personally just stick with it. His feeds will space out soon enough.

I also wouldn't worry about storing up problems for the future by having him in your bed. Obviously make sure you're following safe bedsharing guidelines, but do what you need to to get the most rest now, your DS won't always be in your bed.

It's difficult when they're small, but it'll soon pass and before you know it it will seem a lifetime ago.

Thank you! I guess I'm panicking about co sleeping as we are on hols in June (with in laws!) and bed there won't work for co sleeping. like you say, I'll jusr do what works now.
Plus I have downloaded an app to try to track any patterns which might make me feel a bit more confident that order may emerge one day.

There's a growth spurt at around 3 weeks too, so you might find things settle down a bit soon.

Ooh, that's hopeful. I thought it was 6 or 8 weeks (memory v v blurry from last time around and somehow never seem to have time/free hands to read the baby books!-thank goodness for MN and iPhone!!)

There is another growth spurt around then, but also at around 4-7 days, 3 weeks and 3-4 months. But they can happen at any time. Also, some babies just feed more than others.

I remember the early days of relentless feeding, it's exhausting, but as long as weight gain is good, which it is, at least you can be reassured your baby is getting enough. Just rest as much as you can, difficult with a toddler or older child to look after too, I know.

I second what Midori says. Go with it and he will work out his own pattern.
My LO was like yours & now at a year he will sleep from 9pm-6am, although sometimes it is 7pm-1am & 2-8am. He also has 2-3 hours in the day, normally in one block which he has done since about 5mo.
Best of luck. It does get better!

Oh & he nurses when he wakes at 1am & 6/8am. Sometimes it sounds like he might drown as he gulps it down so fast!!

Haha, nice to hear about coming out the other side! I am in love with him and he is wonderful but, oh the frustration of not knowing what he wants or even what is his 'normal' yet.
But I did resolve to treasure fleeting newborn days, so will focus on that more and stop the pointless fretting. Thank you!!

DD cluster fed and kept me on the sofa for HOURS at the beginning, but at around 14ish weeks her feeds got quicker and better spaced out - she's now 20 minute every 3 hours, and has been for ages. Hang on in there, it should get easier :)

I downloaded an app (babyconnect) recommended on here and actually it has made it a bit easier to see that he is feeding and sleeping in reasonable sized chunks sometimes.
He has definitely slept better last couple of nights.
So thank you v much for calming words and advice.

Glad to hear the app is helping. We used that too. DH loved it because he could log on whilst he was overseas and have a peek at what we had been up to!
One word of warning though - don't use it for weight..... It got us in a panic at one point because we understood it to say DS had dropped loads of centiles after a holiday. Caused an almighty row between us and his family got involved too. Not helpful at all.
If you are in the UK only rely on the red book for weight. Much simpler too!

We used the app until DS was about 10/12 weeks, at which point we felt comfortable "going solo"!
Tbh everything got easier about then. Months 3-6 are wonderful. You know what you are doing, you know your baby better, they can't move much yet, they only drink milk & you can meet your friends for coffee/lunch, go shopping & do a baby massage class etc.
the introduction of solids at 6 months threw me for a bit but we got used to that too.
Time passes in a flash so live in the moment & enjoy every second, yes even the hard parts :)
When the going gets tough, the tough drink