Words of encouragement needed! Am getting worried.

[twojumpingbeans]

Hi there, I am just posting here to see if anyone has any words of wisdom or has had a similar experience with a positive outcome, am starting to get a wee bit (very) worried about my beautiful 5 day old DD.

DD2 was born by ELCS on Tuesday, after a very difficult and stressful experience with feeding DD1 I was determined to breastfeed successfully, or rather, I am still determined.

Anyway, she breastfed in recovery and pretty much constantly ever since, I was discharged from hospital 48 hours after my op with my latch checked and all was well. I noticed she was jaundiced but the Drs said this was totally normal with breastfed babies and that it would clear up soon.

My boobs have been very painful, sore bleeding nipples and constant agony so I got a CMW to come out to check and she helped me with a better latch

Two days later my DD is still very jaundiced, and more worringly is still losing weight, my sodding milk just won't come through. The CMW who came today said that they need to monitor her and are coming back in two days for a re weigh. I just feel so useless, all I want to do is the best for my precious girl.

Is there anything at all I could do to make my milk come through? CMW keeps telling me it's delayed but that doesn't help my teeny tiny girl.

So stressed, sorry if this is a bit incoherent. Have tried massaging and hand expressing milk, just want my girl to get what she needs.

Well I'd say you need help from a BF counsellor. Can your MW put you in touch with one? Get them to visit you ASAP and check the latch again.

Is she producing wet and dirty nappies? What are they like?

Has she been checked for tongue tie? DD fed constantly from birth for a couple of days - she has a tongue tie and I think struggled to get milk out.

I'm assuming you managing to get her latched on for the colostrum though? Do things feel a bit more comfortable since 2 days ago?

Most babies haven't started to gain by day 5 and the mw isn't obviously overly concerned as she's coming back in two days time. Definitely worth keeping an eye on things though.

You could try lots of skin to skin and switch nursing to help bring the milk in.

Sending lots of positive milk producing thoughts your way!

Thank you for your replies,

She does have enough wet and plenty of pooey nappies, her poos have changed to loose green too, which the MW says is a good sign, though again, delayed. I think my latch is okay now but I will ring and ask for it to be checked tmrw, will be the fourth time. I am starting to do thier heads in, she hasn't been checked for tongue tie though so that is definitely an option.

Will also try more skin to skin feeding, it's so hard with DD1 around too, she's 4 and a half so understands more of what is going on and is very quick to pick up when I'm worried or upset, I feel like I'm letting them both down at the moment. DD1 must be feeling abandoned and I can't even get DD2 to feed properly. On the joys of parenthood.

Thanks again.

Don't feel bad about badgering the mws for help- it's important to get the latch right at this stage.

It's a tricky time for everyone isn't it, I remember feeling cut in half trying to deal with two children, but not really managing it very well. Things will get better though and don't forget you've just been through a major operation, so you need time to recover yourself.

Have a google for biological nurturing and see if any of that might be worth a go.

hth and chin up, your milk will be here soon.

Honestly - I'd get a bf counsellor to check. I had MWs tell me my latch was fine but at 8 weeks I went to a BF group and it was pointed out that it wasn't....!

I don't have bf advice but I do share your experience of having a 4 yr old and a newborn. I must admit that I found it impossible to establish bf while DD1 danced around asking questions at the most inopportune moments, like when I was trying to get DD2 to latch on properly a thousand times while in pain.
In the end, I took to my bed with DD2 basically for two weeks, while DH cared for DD1 and kept her out of my hair. Lots of day trips and treats. She was happy as larry- not pining for me at all!- and I got to concentrate on establishing bf. If you have a DH or DP who can do might it work for you? I just simply could not meet the wildly different needs of my two children at the same time...

Iggly- I will do that. I have met my local bf lady, think she has a group at the local children's centre so will drag myself up there for a second opinion, certainly can't do any harm.

I have done a couple of skin to skin feeds today which have proved to be successful, on the last one DD had milk in the corners or her mouth when she finished, which was amazing!

Heliumballoon - my DH is being brilliant, he has basically taken over with DD1. He has got another week off work and they have got lots of little trips out planned too, don't think I could manage without him at the moment. Just feel so sad for DD1, keep reminding her how much we all love her and how important she is, whenever I get a min I try to play but yes, she does tend to ask question after question after question just when I really need her not to! Earlier she was looking at my ravaged nips and was asking why were they so red? why do they have spots on (scabs)? Why does DD2 have so much 'booby juice'? I could go on.... I find myself getting irritated, it's not her fault bless her. This then adds to the cycle of guilt.. I will definitely make the most of DH being around over the next week. Think you're right, it's the wildly differing needs of a newborn and a four year old, am am already getting the Fear about DH's return to work. Eek.

Right, long message. Thanks again everyone for messages, I'm detemined to suss this one!

Blimey - was just looking at the thread about googling your user name and seeing what came up and here this is. It's made me feel very, well, emotional! Partly because I can't actually remember even posting it. Turns out all was not well with DD2 and shortly after I wrote all this she was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis, the constant feeding was because she was malabsorbing her breast milk. I have so few memories of the time before we knew so it was so lovely in a way to read this, like another life. Don't even know why I'm writing this either really. Anyway, she's 4 now and is currently sat with her sister stuffing her little face with spag bol. It's been a bloody tough four years but so far, so good. Crumbs, wasn't expecting this!

What an amazing thread to see how things can change.
Good luck with DDs cf a tough journey I'm sure but she sounds happy